More On Where Things Stand.

Like I've said, my having the car will always be at the top of the list of my concerns. There is simply no way I could live without one now. There was no way I could live without one in 2005. And now things are much different than then and much worse too. I will never deviate from the position in any way. I am also kind of confused how anyone in the US could live their life taking the bus and how they could be expected to do that. The US, wherever you live, is really not made for people who don't drive. And buses are not made for long distance travel on a regular basis, especially like every day. They keep stopping and going because they have to go to the next bus stop, which is usually a couple of blocks away I believe. Then they pull to the curb and stop. And the door opens, giving you that lovely blast of cold air in your face if it's winter. And then you have to wait for people to slowly file in and slowly put their coins in the till. And even that involves walking at least a couple of blocks to a bus stop, with my neuropathic feet and no waterproof boots now (and I really can't afford to get my feet wet now either, or have a slip on the ice). And taking transfers after walking to those bus stops first. What we really need in this country are more subways or high-speed trains like they do in other countries. Plus you just could never do with carrying several bags of groceries like I often do, or carrying bags of laundry like I have to now or carrying something like a big, heavy, bulky pet carrier. Like that mentally ill woman I saw on TV 20 years ago that I was talking about who had her license suspended for just arguing with those police officers. That's the first thing I thought of when I saw that, how will she get her cat to the vet now? When you take away someone's car for any reason it has serious consequences. And why would you do something like that to someone, take their car away for just arguing? No I must always have a car. But I clearly have neuropathy in both my hands, and my future is not clear in many other ways. But I plan to drive for rest of my life IAE.

It's a funny thing about 2004. It seems like it just happened. When I was hospitalized a couple of times in 2004, I met a number of interesting people with interesting stories. It seems like that just happened. But that was a long time ago and they have all moved on and their lives are very different now. I don't know why it feels like it just happened. Maybe because I was back at Sinai-Grace hospital recently and it seems like a continuation of that time in that way. Plus for some reason I keep thinking Livonia Mall in Livonia, MI is still open. After briefly closing, it's weird. We used to go there Sundays after we ate, but it closed for good in 2008. I guess again it seems like a continuation of that time and that is why I think it briefly closed and then opened. But I have to keep reminding myself of that. Yeah, Livonia Mall was interesting in that I saw a lot of police working their on their off time, and it gave me a unique view of those people. They weren't at all like I thought up to that moment. Homophobic, killing animals for the fun of it like they did in Detroit for a while, cruel, etc. They seemed accepting of gay and they were having a drive to buy a police dog a bulletproof vest at one point. I was surprised by all of that and it shaped, or rather reshaped, my view of police after that. And also another thing that makes now different from 2004 is that I lost a lot of people, in other words a lot of relatives, some who helped me a lot. My father, my Aunt Grace and her husband, my Uncle Chet and Aunt Irene and many others. They were all alive then, alive and healthy and like themselves as I remember them as a child in their youth. But they have all passed on since then.