fag hags:opinions?

All the gay guys I know have at least one. And most of the straight girls I know either have a gay friend or wish they did. What do you think? I have to assume this is pretty common. Personally,I prefer the company of gay men because the ones that I know are all hilarious,fun to be with,adventurous,and share my somewhat eccentric personality. I also love gay porn,which is obviously something I can't watch with my boyfriend.

 

People forget that it is not all about sex but about relationships. Straight women can enjoy the company of gay men because they can get rid of all that sexual tension that happens with ANY straight guy they know. (Yes, all straight guys size you up sexually and on some level you know it)

So, that out of the way, you can enjoy male company at its most unselfconscious. (Again, straight guys have an agenda and are on display around women). If you truly accept the gay couple they will appreciate your feminine input that they may miss in the male dominated world that surrounds gay men.

So, "Fag Hags" or "Fruit Flies" are a symbiotic relationship and as you have observed, quite common.

Or at least that is how I see it.

 

I am a fag hag. I have been since the third grade and before I even knew what gay was. I enjoy the company of gay boys and love how some of them view the world areund us. I have had one bad experience with a sreeching trainwreck queen, and that kinda tuned me off for a bit, but now I have new gay boy now and he's 18, blonde and not a sreeching queen. I love my new gay boy!! patrick, If you read this, I lurve you.

 

I don't really care. I think it's kind of pathetic when anyone would go out of their way to be friends with someone because of homosexuality.

 

this world is so full of fucking bull shit people, if someone cares about you that is a good thing. my best friend of the last 6 years, i guess you would defind as a "fag hag". however, you find nice people who care about you appreciate it.

 

Fag hags can take a hike.

 

Its one thing if you're the small effeminate gay guy, one that once girls start thinking about babies arent going to be interested in, in that way, even if the guy was straight. Just as it is with the female best friend, they'll get on well up unto that point where they compete for attention from the same guy, then its usually claws out

Different story if you're the big macho gay guy type, When they are younger they love you cos you're a big guy thats not about the sex with girls. Once they really start to think about babies, then it changes. Up till that point they convince themselves you're not interested in them in that way cos you're gay, when the hormones start back up again they start to work out the more obvious truth, that with some of them you wouldnt be interested in that way anyway, even if you were straight. Girls in that 25-40 yr range, I can only be close friends with the ones that can get hotter guys, or the ones that have close to zero baby making urges, or true bi girls - as they are really the only ones that get us. Not saying I'm hot, just when they are in that age range, well any guy over 6 ft gets a look in.

The real reason we hide or seperate our gay friends from staright friends is not so much about the threat of violence from clueless straight guys. Its more about what straight couples pick up in their partners when around gay people and then get angry cos they dont understand or cant bring themselves to admit. I'm not talking about repressed homosexual urges, half of it has to do with the opposite of sex- Love, which is really about bonding. A gay guy meets up with a straight couple, the wife beams at him and gets all excited, the hubby who has to put up with all her crap 24/7 gets the shits, cos he does all this work and doesnt get a reaction from her like that, he gets confused, doesnt know why that is, thinks its about sex when its about the opposite and he starts giving the gay friend death stars and feels he has to compete.

Or scenario 2, a gay guy meets the straight couple, the hubby is a little more excited than he should be, the wife picks this up but doesnt say anything, sometimes it is about repressed homo urges, feels she has to compete and starts to get bitchy. Even though most of the time it has nothing to do with that. A gay guy to a straight guy represents a guy he can hang out with and not have to worry about keeping up that fake macho bullshit facade. Most of the time its just about a stressless male friend, the wife wont see it that way though.

My point: Human social interactions are all very complicated, nothing is ever what it seems. The fag hag - its never a static relationship, good if she truly wants a non sexual male friend, bad if she views the gay guy as a toy to be played with

 

To the thread starter, sorry if some reactions here sound negative, but pretty much all of us have at least once been screwed over by the self serving female that wants to up her 'coolness' factor by getting a gay friend - really irritating

Doesnt mean we dont cherish the nicer version of the fag hag, one that primarily does want to be your friend


Even though I hate that term, she's not a hag, and I hate the word fag

 

I also agree that no one should seek out freinds just because of their homosexuality.In fact,I recently had this conversation with one of my gay friends because he has issues with people wanting him to be their token gay/black friend. For me,it just happens that the guys I have gotten along with really well are gay,so I have an affinity for gay men because of it. Of course I have met plenty of gay men who are train wrecks,but that can be said about anyone. And I don't normally even say the word fag unless I'm kidding around with one specific friend of mine,but I get called fag hag all the time,so I embrace it. And I'm not some flaky teenage girl looking for cool factor.I'm 31 years old with 2 kids and I want them to grow up accepting of everyone,as I try to be.Thanks everyone for their replies.

 

fag hags, man they wanna be your friend just because your gay, I get them every so often but usually shake em pretty quick.

 

So-called "fag hags" are individuals. Some are sincere, lovely, caring women.

Some women just get along well with certain gay men, especially femme gay men. They sometimes just have a friendship. They may share some things in common; like they both like fashion, they are both into men, they both like feminine things, etc..

 

Ok, what do you consider a bisexual/lesbian who is friends with a gay man? I'm bisexual and my best friend is gay... am I still his "fag hag" and does that make me a "super fag hag" since I'm on the in the the GLBT comm?

 

I think there's more connotations to the term "fag hag" than just a woman who hangs around with gay guys. And I wouldn't think that a woman who didn't fit into that definition would feel too offended by them or bound by them. A lot of gay men have male and female friends. This doesn't necessarily make them faghags.

The archetypal faghag, to me at least, is a girl who latches on to one gay guy, or at least one at a time, using them almost as an excuse not to find a boyfriend. Gay men are like a "safe" male to them, but I don't know that it's so much about sex as it is about being unable to deal with men as equals, to relate to them or understand how they think. Straight men who can't get laid turn to porn or to prostitutes; to me, this seems like the female equivalent, to get some of the feeling of a relationship but circumventing the hard part, the stuff that makes it worthwhile.

But as I said, if the above doesn't apply, or doesn't seem to, I wouldn't consider you a fag hag. Straight chicks in gay bars are two-a-penny these days, but fag hags stick out a mile.

 

I doubt it makes much difference. By all accounts gay man and gay women haven't got a huge amount in common psychologically. I'm not even convinced the GLBT community, or at least the G&L parts, are really a community at all.

 

Trouble is we get stuck on gender just like the straights do .

Most of the girls I get on with have a strong boy part, doesnt have to be much though; just a spoonful of attitude or tomboyishness, even a short hair cut, wider than usual shoulders or slightly deeper voice will do it.

Everyone gay/straight/whatever needs either a certain level of sexual interest or a certain level of familiarity with someone from their past to bother making the effort to be your friend

 

well, i guess i don't really have a friend that is friends just because i'm gay as a fag hag.
My fag hag is a girl that i get along with great, we have the same tastes in guys and it's just a lot of fun to be around her because i came out to her and it's just a really great friendship.
I haven't been in a case where i get befriended just because i'm gay. I'm not totally out yet, so maybe that's the case?

 

I have had some of the same women friends for years.
________
I knew those women when I was a man in a hetrosexual marriage with my ex-wife.
_____________
I knew those women when I came out as a gay, started dressing as a woman (and I was very good at female impersonation), and start dating handsome masculine men.
_______________________
And I know those women these days, now that I have transitioned from male to female, and look, act, dress, and live as a woman full-time, and have taken a female name.
I am on estrogen and anti-androgens, which have given me a lovely woman's shapely body.
I have had my facial and chest hair removed with laser and electrolysis.
I have had facial feminization surgery, which has given me a beautiful feminine woman's face.
And I have enhanced my estrogen-grown breasts with breast implants, and also have had hip and buttocks implants.
I dress very feminine, usually in a dress, or skirt and blouse, and I have beautiful long blonde silky straight hair 3/4s of the way down my back, and I have pierced ears and wear earrings, and I am very good with my makeup, etc..
I am 5'10" tall, I am a slender shapely 130 lbs., I have a 38-24-36 figure, and I have soft feminine skin, a beautiful woman's face, and feminine mannerisms. Unless they know, no one guesses I was once a man.
I look like a beautiful feminine woman in my 40s, and I am with a handsome masculine man who is into transwomen, my man Todd. I live as his wife, and he as my husband.
And the genetic women I know best accept me as a woman, just as they accepted me before as a married hetrosexual man, then a gay man who dressed as a woman, and now that I have been made into a lady, as a female, a beautiful, feminine transexual lady.

The women I know are wonderful, beautiful, feminine lovely women. Including my lovely ex-wife, and my two college aged daughters, whom I am still very close with. Most of the women I know and am good friends with are hetrosexual, and married to men and have children, although I know some single hetro women, some transexual women, and some lesbians also.
I appreciate all of those women that I know. It is wonderful knowing them.

 

Exactly.

Sexuality defines attraction.

Personality is a group of qualities that make up who/what you are.

Once they get intermixed, its a mess. What annoys me most about the homosexual community is that they intermix the two much too often.

 

Personally, I would love to have a 'fag hag' or maybe a group of them. It'd be nice to have a friendship with no sexual tension, and to have some cool chicks around to hang out with and be myself. I mean, who wouldn't want an awesome girl/woman as a BFF? That would rule.

 

In a way, I suppose I have fag hags. But all they really are is friends who don't care for my sexuality. No need to give a name