More Conclusions.

Like I said, many things about this situation didn't make sense to me. One thing was I just wasn't sure what rights I had or if the people in my life weren't really just there to harm me. They certainly said that at Oakwood Hospital in 1989. I didn't imagine it, and my 2011 therapist confirmed many thing like that, many things that really even now don't make sense. And same thing in 2004. I went to Sinai-Grace hospital to be helped after being driven to suicide by all of that. And instead of receiving any help, instead of getting any therapy for that, instead of even having someone treat me with the slightest bit of compassion, I was treated like that. Interrogated, treated with suspicion, made to feel that I was there to be arrested, not helped. By that homophobic staff assigned to me, and others there too to some degree. I really do think that those seven years of suicidal thought led to nothing tragic so I could tell others what happened, everything that happened there and throughout my life, and have all responsible exposed and held accountable. And I think I will probably go there and get the records from that time. Like I've said, I am entering my old age, and I would rather relax and recapture some of the time that was taken from me all my life. But instead I am supposed to be spending my whole life filing endless appeals and having people all play along while I plead for help. And never knowing who to trust, now that I know sworn forms can be fakes. But I do intend to spend the rest of my life exposing everyone and having them face responsibility for what they did, however anything else turns out. And I guess there's a good chance I will just spend the rest of my life living where I am. All my possessions are here, my life as I have built it is here, and now I have to face the rest of my life in this state, alone and damaged by drugs I never consented to, and damage my doctors are still silent about for some reason. It would be nice if I could have someone to help me clean again. And I will probably be needing things like a new car, and I was thinking perhaps a new stove some day. My present stove dates back to the 70s. I really don't think that I was ever living that extravagantly or asking for much. Anymore then there was ever a time in my life that I deserved to suffer or deserved to be unhappy. People often told me that as I said, but I am not going to allow them to have me ever believe that again.

I was also going to say, I am still confused by all that is going on in my life. Harm that should never be done to a patient and legal concepts like fake legal forms and courts and people like that lying to you. Things that wouldn't be allowed in the most extreme case. I guess it could just be done in my case, but that doesn't make anymore sense for the same reason. It also seems like this nonsense began in 1992 with my forced medication, for really no legitimate reason. All while people in my life deliberately acted silly to demonstrate the fact they recognized that fact. But it may have just started in 2011 with Eric become my guardian secretly, to use that power over me. His side of the family always looked down on mine, and my aunt (who was always one of my strongest advocates BTW) said even as the trust was drawn up she suspected Eric had ulterior motives with his mannerisms and attitude at one meeting. I also suspect that at one point Eric, like my Uncle Al, was trying to have me put in prison by whatever means he could find. He knew I am law-abiding and not guilty of any crimes, but that seems to be what was happening. I even suspected it at the time, and then more recently the past couple of years all my fears that he was using his power over me to harm me seem to have come true. I have done nothing wrong, I never broke the law and I am a good person. And like I told Eric and his brother recently, for that reason I have no reason to fear going forward exposing him, and the rest, for all that they did to me like that. Like I said, it's just a theory now. But as time goes by I am planning on moving in that direction. Because no one should do things like that to anyone, especially someone they are supposed to help and protect.