Carry On My Wayward Chat

Pshh boys cost 10x more money than a girl does. A boy wants video games and bicycles and then the next video games and the next bicycle and sports events tickets and upgrade to dirt bikes and bigger TVs for more video games. They need sports equipment, fancy schools to go to for scholarships, the new xbox 520 and a he just ran his dirt bike off the road and guess who's gonna be paying for that one?

A girl. We keep our barbies and ponies for years. We don't need assets, we help mamma in the kitchen and the sewing machine. Costs nothing. Recycled household gifts, no dirt bikes. No xbox824s no big TVs no special school, no sports equipment just hand me downs to help with learning how to live life Instead of being in a fantasy world.

A wedding, kids these days can't even understand a vowel and youre worried about keeping up with traditions of the wife's father needs to pay up LOL holy Moses, Matthew!

I wouldn't have my father pay for my wedding at all, it's not on him I don't care about whatever tradition I could never expect a family to do that.. I'm paying for my wedding. that way I Dun have ta invite many cunts. Dun need uncle willy at my wedding. Another excuse for someone to get drunk for free outta my dads pocket.. Noooot foooooken lyyykely.

 

Just found out my good friend who lives next door is flying back home for she-doesnt-know-how-long. Her dad is in the hospital and it doesn't look good. There might be a funeral in her future.

Me, being a good-natured, but dim-witted, friend, offered to help her in any way possible.

Oh sure, she says. If you guys could check my mail, turn the lights on and off every now and then to make it look like some is home--oh, and take care of my plants.

No problem, I say, despite the fact that she has a lot of exotic plants.

But there is a problem. I can barely keep artificial plants alive. After my dad was a cop, he became a farmer. He could grow plants (pay attention, Stoner's Lounge). But me?

I'm like the Bride in Kill Bill, but with plants. What was I thinking?

 

I never had a pony.

 

This is still so nice of you to offer. Hopefully, the plants will live. :=P

 

Surely you had a barbie who had a horse? Even my Lego's had horses. I dunno oof barbie even had a horse. I never had a barbie I had gi Joe's. And horse figurines. Suppose we did have a farm and actual horses too... But no way a girl is more expensive than a boy on a farm either. We have to be taught how to use a farm, a boy would need another brand new dirt bike every year for it.

 

wedding vow

not vowels

 

I did have that. I loved my Barbies, and my pretend kitchen. I did more in that pretend kitchen than I do now in my real kitchen.

 

Son, I'mma take you to the fishing shop were gonna get some new gear to go fishing with. Girl, you get in there and help your mother bake bread. Pah! Girls more expensive. Wouldn't read about it and if I did read about it, it'd be in a book of jokes.

And when they come back with no fish, it's alright son we'll go fishing on the new Nintendo I bought you and bass pro fishing game!

Meanwhile we are stewing away in that kitchen but don't worry, mum has already taught us how to poison erryone. Muhhaha.

 

I had plastic ones

 

I had a rocking horse. I loved that thing.

 

I never had a rocking horse, just Breyers and My Little Pony.

 

I sometimes miss being a kid and playing with my Barbies.

It was like being a film director. I would concoct these elaborate and dramatic soap opera like story lines for them to navigate. It was fun. I'd give anything to be able to do that today without being judged.

 

lol HF's sex section has that, no?

 

I had 2 sons and a daughter.. I think daughter cost more, but that was my choice.. frilly dresses, Barbie, boots and shoes.. waste of bloody time, she just wanted he man and trucks! Now she drives trucks! Now the sons cost more cos the keep having kids!
The sons borrow money and time, im fed up trying to track her down.. I think over all, the boys probably cost more..

 

Not like going down to the pond and chasin' blue gill or Tommy cods.

This shark? Will swallow you whole. A little shakin' a little tenderizin'...and down you go. Now we gotta do it quick. That'll bring back the tourists...put all your businesses on a payin' basis.

But it's not gonna be pleasant. I value my neck at a lot more than three thousand bucks, Chief.

I'll find him for three. But I'll catch him and kill him for ten.

Now, you gotta make up your minds. You wanna ante up? Or play it cheap...be on welfare the whole winter.

I don't want no volunteers, I don't want no mates--there's too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars for me by myself...

For the that you get the head...the tail...the whole damn thing.

 

that easter egg cartoon is still crackin' me up...I had to forward it to my sisters

 

i miss my model trains.

 

i miss running around and riding a bike all day

 

I miss being a teen with no responsibilities

 

Just make eye contact with the shark and paddle in.

White sharks are skittish and opportunistic predators. They won't attack if they know you know they are there.

And that's only if you're in the .001% stalked by a shark in the first place. They're just misunderstood wild animals.

Sorry, got my undergrad in marine biology. I could go on and on about this stuff.