For the brave only: your most spectacular disaster

Have you ever met John Varley, the retired CEO of Barclays Bank. He would tell you a very different story.
As a matter of interest, his bank did not require UK government funding to survive the recession. The reasons are very interesting.

 

Currently, that's correct, but it varies from month to month and year to year. I spent 8 months just editing poems nonstop, and I've covered just about every website online related to physics and philosophy. Hipforums is merely useful for collecting metaphors, like youtube, but I'm on my last chapter of the book and shouldn't require too many more. Once its finished, I have no use for such websites. Seriously, what has hipforums or youtube or all the censored news and academic websites to offer anyone other than instant gratification?

You might as well waste time watching the boobtube or shooting heroin.

 

A little bit passive but that's exactly the spirit.

 

we used to use the strip of magnet out of the door of an old refrigerator to put down the slots of various vending machine and steal money out of them and way back then newspaper boxes on the corner we're just a steel box with a padlock so those are easy to steal from......

 

Also I've gotten away several times from the popo who did you turns to chase me but couldn't catch me

 

My monumental fuck up was the result of a perfect storm of shit. Like, I don't know if I failed, or if this was literally the only possible outcome. A year ago, I was a newlywed with a kickass job I was good at. I made a lot of money. My wife made a lot of money. I had every Friday off to go surfing. I had a house at party central in a historically gay neighborhood. Everything was perfect.

Today, I am landlocked in the desert 1,000 miles from any ocean, living in a tiny apartment, and working a retail job making a quarter of what I used to. I have no friends, my wife and I work opposite schedules now, so she leaves for work as I get home, and I'm so fucking depressed I'm seriously considering talking to a professional. Crying has become my new favorite pastime.

I had, basically, as close to a perfect life as I could have, and I fucked it all up.

 

This isn't nice to read : (
I'm sorry. Even more sorry I have nothing useful to say.
It won't be forever. I hope things will swing the other way for you sooner rather than later..

 

Thanks to Ya'all , it is going to be a killer thread !
we have some distinguished records so far, #1:

this one is leading so far.

and for #2

I missed entirely the last nine world wars but these stories are quite spicy. well done ! btw you can cut through tnt as much as you want, it will never go off, the trouble starts when you begin to saw into the primer tube.

We miss a lot of details but that must have been a real ordeal, just consider that the story doesn't end here.


You gals&guys ROCK ! Keep the good stuff coming, and the good spirits up !
hahaha that mushroom story really cracked me up, too bad it's not a disaster at all..

 

I like how you presented your story. Like i can feel the suspense while reading it. I would've made that same story boring: "I remember i stole my parents car and went joy riding with it. Then ran from the police until i was eventually caught."

One of these days we need to hang out and do some serious shoplifting together. Perhaps steal a few cars and rob a few people along the way. Hell yeah, i love to rob people. That should be fun.

I'm only kidding of course.

 

LOL, I’m glad you liked it brother Darkness!
I tried not to make it so damn long, but I had to capture every detail. Yeah, I’d say pretty much after that, my mischievous days got behind me, I was done with all the foolishness and cleaned up my act. I left out one more thing in the story- the fact that I was on the brink of committing suicide in my jail cell that first night. Yeah, I hit rock bottom emotionally from the embarrassment and humiliation that I didn’t want to face. I straightened up after that night.

 

A little inspirational clip :

 

Holy shit, I think you win the thread.

Noserider, what? Where are you living now? I literally cannot imagine how all of that could possibly be your fault!

 

Damn dude, next time I ride shotgun, K?

 

Wrong. We may be spread out a bit but you definitely have friends.

 

Wouldn't a "spectacular disaster" be something like blowing up half the town?

 

My mind.

 

Yes that would be spectacular but er... only Butters can make carnage fun !

BTW my own fuck-up is still the weirdest of the bunch . Keep posting fellows, I bet the real oddball, grotesque, ridiculous stuff is still to come.

Oh... you didn't really raze the town... right ?

 

I was nowhere near the town... Honest.

 

a spectacular disaster would be something like blowing up half the government, but i probably shouldn't say that.