When Your Child Start Masturbating???

When your child start masturbating and you catch them in the act, what would you do or say to them, if anything?

 

I think the best thing is to talk openly about it. Everyone does it at some point or another. Just let him know it is normal and let him know what to expect out of his body, now that it is starting ot change from a boy into a man. Maybe you could find come help from a book or website set up for this type of thing. I just think the best thing to do is not to make him feel embrassed by this! You are gonna hafta kinda put your toughts aside on this one.

 

But he is so young. I think I would be more embarrased than him. I'm going to tell his dad about it, but I wanted to try and handle it myself.

 

The best response would be to point and laugh.

 

Thats my point, you hafta put your embarrasment aside. And obviously hes not to young! I think maybe you and the father should address the situation!

 

I really didn't think it would be this hard to talk about sex to my son. But I know I have to. Last school year, my son told this one girl, that he liked, that he wanted to rip off her clothes and kiss her body. Well, his comment got back to the principle and he had to go to Saturday school, as a punishment. Even then, I was shocked, I asked him why did he make that comment to that girl and he said because he watched "How High" over his dad's house and only said it to the girl as a joke. I was more upset with his dad for letting him watch that movie. But I told my son that he couldn't go around making sexual comments to girls and that he was grounded from playing his games and that for now on he had to be supervised when watching any movies over his dad's house.

 

I think openly talking about it will make him more comfortable knowing htat its normal to do it and feel those things. Kids think and talk about sexual things all the time. At least they should know that it's ok. I would probably just let my son know this isn't something he should do in public but in his own room is ok.

 

Just tell him what will make other people feel offended and what may cause harm to him or others. I think that if he's a smart kid you don't have to bother with the rest. My parents never did and I figured it out just fine.

 

there are some good books - i asked my son if he'd rather talk about it, or read about it & ask questions if he has any. of course, he said the book, what boy wants to talk to their mom about sex? i say though, you cannot let this pass - he's aware, he needs to be informed for his own safety. when i was working at a middle school 12 years ago, we had 6th graders getting pregnant. just hoping his friends will fill him in isn't responsible. nowdays sex education is a matter of life & death.

i know it's kinda weird to talk about sex with your boy, but after you get through the initial embarassment it gets easier. what's worse, being a little embarassed, or being a grandmother in a year? or, god forbid, your boy getting stds? or burying him in a few years because of aids? i read just a couple of weeks ago that there's a new strain of hiv that goes to full blown aids in FOUR MONTHS.

and maybe you should start knocking on the door before you go in.

 

You are totally right!!..Thanks for your advice.

 

wow! i was right about something? i'm gonna have to mark that down on my calendar...

the book i got for my boys is It's Perfectly Normal - not TOO graphic (some books are almost porn), cartoon drawings, and it doesn't give 'technique' tips, for want of a better word they can learn technique from their friends - lol!! it covers everything, in basic language. my mom suggested i use a razor to cut out the pages i didn't want them to read, but i think it's better for them to be educated. the things kids tell each other, like, 'you can't get pregnant if you do IT standing up'!!! lol!!!

of course, my mom only told me about asprin being the only sure birth control... when you hold it between your knees, you can't get pregnant - lol!!!

 

THAT is funny!

 

Thanks for the information!!

 

What about the whats happening to my body book for boys

 

i didn't see that one applespark - you'll have to write us a review.

mike, i dunno too much about raisin girls. but i know if any child was humpin MY leg i'd have to put a quick stop to it - being the adult, that's sexual abuse regardless if it's them starting it. they DON'T know society's rules, it's up to us to educate them in a manner that's age appropriate of what is and what is not acceptable, without warping their little minds about sex.

here's a good article from www.askdrsears.com, and a couple of excerpts - i really like that site, it gives sensible advice.

Most children play with their genitals—expect this somewhere between age of two and six.


3. Not in public, please. Dear old Aunt Mary is sitting in your living room and in full view four-year-old Susie climbs on the arm of the couch, wiggles around, and soon has that happy look on her face. Other faces in the room turn red. Witnessing anyone masturbating embarrasses adults. Without making judgments about your child's actions, matter-of-factly advise her that anything to do with her "private parts"—like going to the bathroom—is private. Use this as a teachable moment and nicely explain that you want your child to "go do that where I can't see you—it makes people uncomfortable." Usually the child will choose to stop the activity so he or she can stay near you. Normal social living demands that people often delay their own gratification (or subdue their own feelings) out of respect for the feelings of others. The best approach is to quickly distract the child into a more socially-acceptable activity.

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i've used the private reasoning before, ya know, kinda told them 'that's why they are called privates - it's for private time' - not to make it a thing to hide and be ashamed of but to know that it's not something you do in front of everybody else. and also, maybe bring it to their attention that nobody else is doing it in public, like the grocery store or the library or wherever - but not blurted OUT in public! my boys would just melt of embarrassment - can you imagine??? 'hey, nobody's whackin' off in the produce department today!!!' lol!!!!!

 

Well, I started when I was NINE so HA!!!!

 

Please for the love of crap DO NOT talk to your kids about masturbation, i cannot think of anything more cringeworthy....

 

hahahaaaa!!!! you are SOOOO lucky you aren't my kid :X

no, i don't torment them with talking about it much, or technique or anything really 'cringeworthy' but i have had that conversation with them...

 

it's important to have conversations about it....My mom took the Christian route though....telling me that it was NOT ok to masturbate...that it was a sin...so until I dropped Christianity, I felt guilty everytime I even washed myself and spent more than 10 seconds down there!

 

Hahaha...i don't think my folks have EVER done that....thank goodness....then again the sex ed in england is very good so i learnt it off a puberty video....now theres no going back!