Does a bitch have to write a manual?!

Why is it that in porn, when a guy is going down on a chick they:

- lick it at light speed:
I dunno about you but I prefer a soft, slow flutter than this light speed guido licks that theses greaseballs give. They teach guys this! So now you got some dickless wonder out there thinking that that is the proper way to give a girl head. I have a tip for you: it isn't.

- look like they are stabbing her pussy with two fingers: It is a vagina, not a fucking jar of peanut butter.

- the excessive clit rubbing
seriously yo, it isn't a fucking car getting waxed.

I hate it when they show the guys. Crop em out as much as you can for christ's sake! All I want to see is a pelvis and some dick, and some nutsack swinging back and forth. I don't want to see their faces! It is really hard to get turned on when there is some white boy with a BLONDE-FUCKING-AFRO going down on a girl. I just can't take that shit remotely seriously. I kid you not, dude looks like a surfer version of Mike Brady.

Your thoughts?

 

ROTFLMAO!!!!

I wholeheartedly agree with everything you just said!

 

yea totaly.. then again i find it hard to get turned on buy guyds in porn...i like the female form too much.

 

You should wear a t-shirt that says that.

 

Think about it.....if a couple wants to "get in the mood", the LAST thing they want to do is rent a porn flick. It's actually quite a turn-off......everything is too fast, too savage, too robotic. The actors are like wind-up toys...it's a wonder that anyone can even stand up the next day.

And forget sex-themed movies...most end in murder or tragedy, most definitely a turn-off.

These films must all be directed by eunuchs, idiots. What a waste......

 

Actually, not all porn is "savage"... I've seen quite a few erotica films that were sexy as hell.

 

White boys have no idea what it means to turn a lady on. You're right! What the ladies need is a love makin' brother like myself to show 'em what it means to be pleasured and, more importantly, cherished as a woman!

 

"look like they are stabbing her pussy with two fingers: It is a vagina, not a fucking jar of peanut butter."

Don't ya know? All those pornstar-lettes gots pussies of steel.

 

I's gotts ta say, dem dare steel pussies be reel nice for a ball bangin' brudder likes me self.

 

I like a good savaging.

 

Some of them aren't so bad -- the porn industry has actually made an effort to respond to women's interests in this regard... Their technique still sucks, but at least there are far fewer guys that look like Ron Jeremy!

To add to your complaints:
-- what the fuck is up with the stilletto heeled platform shoes 2/3 of the women wear DURING sex? I mean, if she's gotta walk in wearing 'em, fine, but take 'em off when you strip, dammit! And that ain't just me thinking of how painful it would be to wear them, my boyfriend gets freaked out at how painful it could be if she were just a slight bit careless with how she moved her legs!!!

-- For as bad as some men look, the boob wrinkles caused by bad positioning with fake boobs just looks like shit. That is a MAJOR turn-off for me. Nasty.

-- Notice how every woman in porn loves anal? Sorry, that just ain't for me, I won't do it, I don't want to watch it. I'm not complaining that it's out there, I'm just complaining about how hard it is to find a movie with just vaginal sex, no anal.

 

Not true. Yeah, you have to be careful about what you rent, make sure you get one that pretends to have a plot instead of one that just goes from sex scene to sex scene. But it can be quite arousing to watch with a partner.

 

lately i've grown to totally hate porn. this may just be because of my husband, who is an idiot regarding women. my husband likes it, but so much i see is just plain stupid. for starters, what's with all the ugly men? and i think you're right, too many guys watch the stuff thinking it's going to show them how to make love to a woman. it doesn't ever show how to turn a woman on. most of the time, that's not what the porn is concerned with. it just shows what the guy wants to see to get off. the woman's pleasure is only an afterthought - also shown only because it's what the guy wants to see to get off. that's why it always looks so fake.

i've become very cynical lately about the quality of erotica available. it's not couple-centered, and it most certainly isn't woman-centered. where's the porn that teases and tempts, that sets the mood, that woos and romances? where's the porn with hot-looking straight guys that treat a woman the way she wants to be treated between the sheets? forget it. in spite of companies like good vibrations, the sex industry is still about men and what they want. nobody wants to make porn like that, because no (male) one wants to watch it.

 

This is called "coochie abuse" and is a serious crime. 8 out of 10 women have been coochie abused in real life (the rest are virgins). We at the C.A.D. appreciate you identifing the source of this offense and will be sure research it thoroughly. Thanks for your support.

 

i can totally relate to kitty fabulous
thank you for that sweetie

but we do like a good savaging once in a while

 

That's freakin hilarious, man. Thanks!

 

I must have something extremly backwards here then. I try to go slow and love my last xgirlfriend and she asked me "why are you going so slow"

now that i think about it all the fucking done in their was alot like porn at her discretion... she was a little bit of a *cough* though. dam biatch and cheatin on me lol

 

It has nothing to do with color, sweety. My husband is a wonderful lover. I was refering to porn.

 

well, hell yeah! but there's a difference between wild, intense, free and passionate savaging and the scripted, robotic, empty "savaging" you see in most pornos.

 

Porn is too male-centered, but if you think about it, they have it all wrong.

A couple rents a movie or film or "one night in Paris". The guy doesn't need much to get him going.....most guys are like ON-OFF switches. Women usually need more time......but so many porn flicks cater to the guys, so what happens? Wham Bam Whoops.........