If YOU ran a CULT what would it be like?

ME?

My cult would be convinced that i'm the reincarnation of Sisyphus.
worship of the earth.
emphasis on perseverance.
we'd all be naked but for derbys.

how about you?

 

To participate in activities that are anti cult.

 

I would order everyone to leave me the hell alone and stop following me around.

 

Members of my cult would have to speak in nonsensical jibberrish punctuated by hysterical laughter at all times.

It would be alot like Hippyland.

 

A total revival of Dionysis worship. Anyone who is into greek mythology will know why...

 

I am going to follow naykidapes cult.

BLACKABACA!!!!!!!
AHAHAHAHA!!

 

schemdalglockenspeil!!!

har, har, har......(I may have just accidentally spoken in german)

 

cult of personality, just because It won't be hard to find a song to play during ceremonies.

 

- The followers would have to listen to each of the following bands for an hour every day:
Grateful Dead
Pink Floyd
Dave Matthews Band
Simon and Garfunkel
The Beatles
Phish
Bob Dylan

-They would have to wear something pink everyday. No matter how small.

- No fubu or sean jean allowed or any other "ghetto fabulous clothing".

- They would refer to me as Mrs. Matthews

- We would all go to Schwagstock together. Each and every Schwagstock. And they will love it.

- I will give them pop quizzes about my likes and dislikes, and if they miss one question they have to sing a song of my choice. If they cannot complete the song they must eat my pussy.

- To join, each person must prick their finger and let out a few drops of blood into my vase. The blood will all my mixed together. On the fifth night after the cult is formed we will all stick our fingers in the mixed up blood and taste it. This will ensure they we are in it for life.

- Any other rules I can think of will be enforced. No questions asked.​

 

The Family.

 

Excellent post. Those are very good reasons not join a cult. Keep it up.





As for me: Well, I already have a cult. You see, millions of hot women all over the world worship me and my dick. They just don't know it yet.

 

all those i deem attractive would be part of my personal harem
no flesh would be consumed
the unicycle would be the main mode of transportation
rap, mainstream hip hop and bubblegum pop would be unallowed
clothing would be optional, and no one would care either way

 

*prays that you find him attractive*


Edit: Oh yeah. You're gay. Well...I could shave and sway my hips when I walk...

But look!




And...and...!




If nothing else, that should give Adam the hard-on of his life.

 

I feel that if we combine naykidape's cult with psyche's cult and then force cirrhosis to pinch his own nipples all day and night our cult will polarize the heart quite perfectly

 

I'm three steps ahead of you. *pinch, tweak, flick*

 

Ok...is no one else disturbed by those pictures?!?! LMAO

......I think I pissed myself

 

If you were worth anything at all, you would be turned on.

 

As you know, I of course, find it extremely sexy and I am amazingly turned on.

 

Well, duh.

 

Hmmmm.... My cult.

Our God: The Holy Shoe Godess, which comes in men's as well.
Our sacrificial animal: The Slinky. The bravest of our cult will hunt these for our sacrificial purposes.
Our Holy garb: We will wear nothing but underwear and ponchos. Anyone whom does not wear underwear(loose underwear at that!), will be ejected from the cult for being grose.
Our Holy text: Cults for Dummies. If there isn't already a book of such a title, please write one, because we need it.