Hey guys....this is the deal...my guy is over in Afghanistan for a year....and we've been sooooo into each other since the very first moment we laid eyes on each other.....and 2 weeks ago he had to leave for deployment....(which he may be able to come home after 6 months instead of a year) but after a conversation with him on the phone tonite he has a lot of doubt in his voice about if we're gonna last or not....he's afraid I'm not going to last is what it is......sometimes I can't explain myself in words to him like he'd like for me too.....verbally that is.....b/c i get tongue tied a lot speaking to him when trying to explain how much i'm really into him.....but i wrote him this letter tonite........hoping it helps him understand me a little bit better....and the letter turned out to be better than I expected...........i'd like for you guys to read it and let me know what you think about it.....it's exactly how I feel.........but i just thought i wrote it really well.........what do you all think???? oh and any comments about it??? please feel free ~~~~~~Sometimes I feel you get really agitated with me. And sometimes I feel you get frustrated when talking to me. Like tonight wgeb we were talking you seemed very doubtful about things, especially, and mostly, about "us". I know you won't get this letter until a week or two weeks from now and you probably are thinking which conversation I'm talking about but that doesn't matter. What matters is that is worries me and bothers me to think and feel as if you are only thinking of how there will never be a you and I. As if you don't even have an offering of hope to give me. I feel as if you don't believe me when I say I miss you and how much you do mean to me but Brandon those questions are unfair. How could I possibly explain to you the depths of how much I miss you and care about you? Especially when the depths are neverending? You ask me to explain these things to you, these things which are, either fortunately or unfortunately, whichever way you choose to portray them as, impossible to explain. You may ask why would being unable to explain such feelings be something considered fortunate? Because you probably consider how I can't explain such feelings as unfortunate, right? Of course, which explains to me why you get frustrated when I can't, with words, explain my feelings to you. And I understand but sorry I am not. I consider it something fortunate because what I feel for you goes so deep it's worth so much more than words. Words are not good sometimes, but silence and stares are. You can learn so much more from someone and about someone by being quiet than from words that someone might say because words anyone can say, in any way and form and in any language which can have more than one meaning which can cause much confusion. Feelings are true, words a lot of times are just words. So I ask you to trust my feelings. And you may ask how can you know if my feelings are true? That's where trust and honesty come in. They aren't bought with words, they are bought with feelings. And feelings are sought by actions of faith which are blind because they can only be felt. And you may be thinking that I'm way in too deep but your thoughts, my thoughts, everyone's thoughts are all misleading at times. Thoughts are words. Remember that. Your instincts are not...they are feelings...so go with your instincts, they will never do you wrong. And as far as my instincts, you're written all over them. And I always follow my instincts....I do now, that I've met you. So I want you to know and understand that because I may not always be so open with words verbally that it doesn't mean I do not feel for you. I feel for you, miss you, care more about you than you believe. I want you to feel that. I want you to trust me, believe me, and have faith in me. I want you to understand that no matter what individual paths we must take in order to complete certain things we need to complete in our lives, understand that when all is done, you will be in my life, or my life will never be completed. I want you and I to be on the same page. It worries me when I hear doubts in your voice about the future and it hurts when you seem frustrated with me when I can't explain something I feel. Trust me, okay? I will never hurt you again. Just don't lose faith in me when I can't explain my feelings in words to you. I'm here, regardless, until the end.~~~~~~~~
Soulsister, Great letter..they say that distance is a killer for love.. but in this case..you have showed your deep love.. and respect for Brandon...and these things have their value.. Don't worry..this letter will touch Brandon's heart.. and everything will be all right for both of you.. Big smile..Emiel
awww thanks guys!.....and yes...i definitely wrote it out...didn't type it...i love handwritten letters so much better sometimes i love him....and you guys....keep him in your thoughts and prayers.....he's in such a dangerous place and my heart weeps he must be there
