this is really sad. but for two days in a row i've eaten something. an icecream, a pancake, and then spewed it up straight afterwards... why do i always need to have a way of punishing myself? if its not drugs, i gave them up...its...making myself fail in school. if its not that then it has to be something.. i am obsessed by punishing myself. why?????
I sometimes enjoy pain too, but nothing serious haha just something stupid like setting my pit-hair on fire or lighting a fart or something dumb. Once I jumped into a pile of leaves on a scooter and I hit my head on the curb, I had to get stiches. Maybe you should try shit like that instead. Or you could always get counceling or something, are you trying to end the habit, find a reason for it, or a new way of satisfying it or what?
yeh i do that to myself too.... i faint alot....and throw up alot...etc i dunno, have you done something you feel guilty bout?
BabyFf is on to something there. Maybe it's guilt. But the good news is that self-punishing is not always a bad thing; you can channel it into constructive purposes, especially with guilt. For example, if you feel bad about eating ice cream, why not run 10 miles and "punish" yourself that way? I've got a thing about punishing myself, too. (hehe, yah, getting myself thrown out of school was one of the most satisfying things I've ever done!) I've figured out that pain can inspire & motivate great things. I think some people are just built that way. I'm not necessarily talking sado-masochism tie-me-up-&-whip-me stuff ...um, although... that's not entirely out of the question... damn, what was I talking about...?
lol... i do that. today i walked 19 miles in one go. interesting perspectives here. i really value them.
