I dont want to staple my twat shut

please help me. ok for background info i am 18 years old and in a committed relationship where we both love each other very deeply.we have been together for over a yr but broke up once during it which we both feel was a huge mistake.. anyway..he is almost 18 this is just to show you that we are not 12 and just flings or anything.. well this is my twat issue. i worry. a lot. i am a virgin and so is he and we have gotten into some heavy makeout sessions recently where sex was brought up and we both wanted to but i hadto say no because i am not on the pill and even though he has condoms i DEFINATELY cannot just trust a condom as the only form of BC. i am wayyy to much of a worrier for that. i am going on the pill in a few weeks so i can feel better about having sex because i feel that i am ready except for the pregnancy factor. but if i waited to have sex til i was comfortable iwth being pregnant... ok then i will be a virgin for 5 or more years and i seriously dont think i can do it. what i am trying to say is.. even on the pill and using a condom i still know i will be sooooo worried that i am pregnant every time i have sex because there is still a CHANCE. and that fucks with me. even when we dry hump and he has his pants off but my panties are on.. i freak out bc i was told there is still a chance. i am just a freakout. i need help here on how to loosen up or something because i cant just not have sex until i want to have kids.. which means i will only fuck twice in my life cuz i want 2 kids. this is just not right. i know u people do it like rabbits and seem to be not having problems. please any help would be greatly appreciated. i just dont know what to do (more like think) without going crazy.

 

Oh my! Don't overreact. If you take the birth control pill every day at the same time according to the instructions, you should end up like my wife and I. We have sex three or four times per week, for more than 18 years. When it was time to have children, she stopped taking the pill and fell pregnant. Twice as planned.

So my dear, we have had sex more than 3,000 times and no unwanted pregancies. Just her on the pill and because it was monogomous I used no condoms. And it is still the same. The pill and no condoms.

 

Well, first of all I congratulate you for at least being concerned about it. Too many women (and I use the term lightly) don't seem to think that far ahead.

That being said, you should know (not to scare you even more) that the birth control pill must be taken for 1 full month before it becomes effective. Talk to your doc for more info. On that note, when you turn 18 or when you become sexually active (whichever comes first) you should make an appointment with your gynechologist for a pap smear and other routine checks. While there, you can talk to them about other options for bc.

There are things you can do in addition to condoms and the pill to prevent pregnancy. One is to buy a fertility monitor so you can find out which days of the month you are most fertile. In most women, this occurs about 15 days after the first day of your period (unfortunately, this is also when women are most horny, lol). This doesn't mean you can't get pregnant any other time, but at least you can avoid sex on the days when pregnancy is most likely to occur.

Then, you can also buy spermacide. It's a gel (or a cream) that you put into an applicator and basically shoot it up your vagina after you have sex.

Another option is a diaphragm, although you have to go to your gynechologist and get fitted for one. It's a little plastic/rubber like dome-shaped cup that you insert right below your cervix so the seman can get past.

There is also the morning after pill, which is now available over the counter. You take them within 72 hrs of having unprotected sex (if you get caught up in the moment) and it prevents any egg from implanting into your uterus.

Also, most condoms have spermacide powder on them. If you take the right measures, and are responsible, you should have nothing to worry about.

Hope this helps.

-Kate

 

Listen, as i 19 year old guy, i understand the sudden chance of kids is pretty scary. But If birth control is your main concern, then a condom should be sufficient, but if you are going on the pill and using condoms then your effectivly safe. Trust me with both of thoose combined, you should be more woried about emmacualte conception then by getting pregnant from your boyfriend. with PROPER use of condems the effectiveness is roughly around 90%, and considering that most of that error is for improper usage and the effectivness of the pill is something like 99%, [size=-1]statically[/size] its almost impossible for you to get pregnant. I mean its probably still possible... but you probably would have more of a chance of falling off of a cliff, but instead of the impact killing you, you get struck by lightning on the way down. My advice is not to worry about it, its probably just pre-sex jitters which is making you worried about it. But I kinda understand it anyway, and you might want to try having sex the first time a few days after you've had your period, which would reduce the risk even lower.
If your still woried, theres the morning after pill(Levonelle-2), which would probably bring the risk of pregnancy down to some astronomicaly low preportion that i dont even want to think about. But i really dont reccomend being that drastic, as taking all thoose hormones would probably make you nauceous.
Incidentally, in 2005 theres finally going to be the release of the male birth control pill, which has pretty much the same ingrediant as the womens birth control pill, estrogen. (plus some testosterone 'boosters' to prevent unwanted feminization) In clinical studies so far this method of contreception has shown to be 100% effective.
http://www.askmen.com/love/dzimmer_60/72_love_answers.html

 

first of all, try not to worry so much. Secondly, maybe the pills not the best choice if you are that worried. My friends on the depo shot (and im actually debating doing it) look at the side effects and all, look into it and see if youd like it. It stops you from menstruating completely. You cannot get pregnant. You get the shot every 3 months, and youll be infertile while taking the shot. (you can have kids again, you just need to stop taking the shot for a while so youre body starts ovulating again)

anywho, look into the shot, id still use condoms if youre that worried... im sure you can trust youre guy not to mess around, but its always safer to use condoms.

But if youre on the pill (talk to your gyno shell explain how safe you are and all...) and using a condom i wouldnt be so worried.

hope i can be of some help

 

Then don't. I wouldn't recommend it, really. In fact, I've never heard any good stories of people doing such. Just listen to the nice people above me and don't, by any means, put a stapler anywhere near your twat.