anybody ever feel this way?

this sunday it will be exactly one year since a really close friend of mine died.
long story short, i feel i need to get something dedicated to his memory tattooed. i want my first one to be a memory of him that i can keep and show forever.
i dont want just an RIP with dates. ideally, id like to design something myself or at least a general outline.
the problem is, i can't think of anything good enough. i cant find something worthy of him, something deserving of his name. he was not exactly a kid you could put in a nutshell, which is why i love him, of course
i dont think i have enough space on my entire body to say everything i want to about him.
so im wondering: anybody ever feel like this? what did you decide to do?
even if no one has, i really needed to vent, so thank you all for that.

-marissa

 

what is somethinghe liked alot....a certain band maybe or maybe he was into some kind of hobby?....think about it until u come up with what he liked alot and have either the dates of when he died put on or his initials or something...hope i helped

 

my roommate and I both have sort of "memorial tattoos" but hers is more directly dedicated to our friend that died. She has a moon tattooed on her leg, but inside the moon is what looks like a really neat squiggly type design. In actuality, it is our friend's initials in a really neat script. You could do something like that, or something more along the lines of what mine is, which is a symbol which I feel represents my life as well as his. Trust me when I say that time really does heal the pain some, so in the long run, you're probably going to want something on your body that means just as much to you as it would to your friend. Just a thought! I hope that helps, and I"m sorry about your friend.

 

jest give it time. if it is ment to be, then it will come to you when the time is right. give yourself sometime to morn. you could sit down with some markers and think about them, and start drawing. madey something will come to you or he will send soemthing to you.


love and blessings apple seed

 

I would never ever get a tattoo for the reason you said you were considering it. I memorialize things in very different ways. I don't need to make a display of my grief on my body for all to see, and I certainly don't need it to help me remember the loss of someone.

-Jeffrey

 

Friends that are close have insiders... Who cares what other people think its a tribute to him and a symbol to you. It could be a frozen pineapple.

 

did u come up with something yet??

 

what did he like to do? maybe somethin that he enjoyed a lot incorporated with the dates and his name or somethin like that

 

first, not a display of grief, a celebration of life.
second, not for anyone but myself to honor a friend, not keep me from forgetting (which is in no way possible)
third, for 'peacefuljeffery,' seems a bit confrontational man.

everyone who's shared ideas, i truly appreciate your help.
i think the biggest block holding me back is that he always felt he represented an entire community of young people who had similar experiences with intolerance.
he was openly gay and endlessly tortured for it, not only by peers, but his own family who threw him out. in seventh grade, he was abducted by a 'family-friend' and molested for 5 days.
long story short, the trauma that he went through gave him strength to stand up for others, but inwardly, he suffered for years.
all of this drove him to cutting and hard drugs, which is what killed him.
he od'ed on heroin, few people even knew he was using.
it's the saddest thing i can imagine, he was such a burst of light and love.
i know how much it hurt him every time someone would make a rude comment or mutter "uhhmmmmm, FAG" when they passed him in the hall.
i want to memorialize him with something that promotes tolerance, understanding, and compassion.

ugh, i miss him so much it hurts. reading all of these responses has definately helped though. thank you all so much.

love <3

 

Hmm that's tough. I have mixed feelings about these kinds of tattoos. I wanted to get something like it for my dad, but just a small mickey mouse silhouette, (My dad was obsessed with mickey shit) with the dates underneath. But i think the mickey head is kinda corny and really doesn't suite my jive. Anyways, i thought to myself that i really didn't want to memorialize the death of my dad on my body because it's just not the appropriate way for me to do it since i still have a lot of underlying issues with it.

AAANYWAYS....lol... I think, like an above poster said, just wait it out, it'll come to you eventually. Think of old inside jokes you had together, maybe a line from a song or a movie that was "yours"... if you were truly close to this person, the possibilities could be endless in terms of jokes or favorite nights together that you shared. Before you get it though, just always remember to remember a beautiful life, rather than a tragic death, and be prepared to talk about it....because many people will ask. Another reason i didn't want to get the tattoo for my dad, is because i really didn't want people talking or asking about it all the time. good luck.

 

get something rainbow like, like a rainbow ring or something. Representing eternity and your friend being the colourful person that you described him as.

 

There were two caterpillars and they loved one another very much.
Well one day one of the caterpillars died and the other caterpillar was heart broken and would just weep in sadness and grief over it's lifeless friends body.
Everyday a Butterfly would watch on and stare at the caterpillar mourning.
So finally the caterpillar got angry and told the Butterfly....why do you bother me? Why don't you fly away and leave me in my sadness and grief?
The Butterfly responded---I am your friend and nothing ever really dies it just transforms into something new. I am now a beautiful Butterfly and someday you too will be just like me and we will fly and be together once more.
So I think a Butterfly might be a fitting design for your loving friend.
I think he is lucky to have had you as his friend.
Peace The Wiz

 

that is BEAUTIFUL man, really is.

 

drew, that just absolutely made my day.
thank you for your thoughts, it is a truly beautiful story.
love

 

it's really amazing you want to get tattooed because of that reason, kinda sad though. do you want to wake up every day, looking at yourself and keep thinking of your friend? naturaly, we dont want to forget someone we love, but it's also natural to let it go after a while and accept it...
i dont know how bad is it and if you really really into it, but i'm sorry, and i hope that whatever you choose to do will be right for you.