amerikkka

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by maryfairy, Jun 24, 2004.

  1. maryfairy

    maryfairy flower

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    i wrote this a few weeks ago and hhmmmm, yeah, i guess its kinda of abstract so if you have questions feel free to ask. or critisize. or whatever.

    amerikkka

    he walks alone. SOLDIER.
    army disbanded, burrowed
    into holes of a net. orders:
    STEAL this, STEAL that,
    ...but leave the plastic.

    his home is MAN_MADE
    DIRT where the
    hangers hold nothing
    in a nothing closet
    millions are LOCKED in.

    he doesn't own a TV.
    he watchs Survivor where
    PUPPETS entertain PUPPETS
    and sand stirs. where's
    jiminy cricket?

    two drugs pass through
    him, Him, and HIM. one says
    "kid, keep up. listen,
    march DIE for MURDER.
    we'll call you Pat."
    the other- a wartime foe.
    it keeps shooting [up].

    his eyes open up,
    dialate, see. senses show
    nonsense. he only asks
    "George or Abbie- who's
    the father of america?"
    NO ONE CAN HEAR ANYMORE.
     
  2. Meeshka Chaukinov

    Meeshka Chaukinov Senior Member

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    very nice. i agree with most of what you are saying. i especially enjoyed the survivor bit.
     
  3. skyfire

    skyfire Member

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    you were right...this is quite abstract...but i like it...these were my favorite parts...
     
  4. maryfairy

    maryfairy flower

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    thank you and thank you.
     
  5. littleskinny

    littleskinny Member

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    This is funky...really like!
     
  6. TelimTor

    TelimTor Member

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  7. maryjaneguitargurl

    maryjaneguitargurl I am just like you.

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    Thats an interesting piece of worky you gotty therey. I likey it..

    peace
    chickens
     

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