Hello everyone. I'm in a relationship with a really great guy. We've been together for two years and are talking about marriage and kids and spending our lives together. However, three years ago I dated this guy. We only went out for a few months, but I was crazy about him. For ridiculous reasons, I broke up with him and then tried to get him back for a long time. I ended up looking like a fool and we haven't spoken since. It took a long time to forget him, move on and love again. Yesterday, out of the blue (three years later) I get this letter from him. He apologized for everything that happened, and spoke of how us being together was a great part of his life. He even mentioned that he was happy to hear I was in a good relationship, yet his e-mail had all those undertones about missing me and being sorry and all this. Unfortunately, I now have this terrible longing for him again. I miss him. I feel so confused and like my world has been turned upside down. I know I should stay away from him and continue life with my lovely boyfriend. Yet, why do I want him now? Is it a self-destructive thing? Am I crazy? What should I do?
You want him because you're looking at only the good parts of his memory, and right now you're living with something good and bad, and most likely the good of your boyfriend far outweights the bad...but everyone has bad traits and with the way you're communicated with this ex, shows only the good...I reccomend staying with your boyfriend whom you love, and not doing anything on a whim.
Hmmm... as I see it, you can choose 1 of 3 possible solutions: 1. Keep the status quo. Make him do all the work if he wants it. 2. Three words: deception, deception, deception. 3. Dump the chumps, fuck the Spaceduck (lmao I can't believe I just said that out loud) Sorry I couldn't resist. Ok, I'll pm you my serious response now.
But what if I want Spaceduck more than I want my boyfriend?? Thanks for the advice. I agree that I was just seeing the good parts. It was a shitty relationship and I guess I haven't completely surpressed all those feelings yet. I think I'll be alright afterall.
awww...that can be hard. just remember how much you love your present boyfriend and how wonderful your relationship with him is that's all i can offer at the moment...good luck...
That is so true! Its like the "grass is always greener on the other side" thing. People tend to idealize the past. I second the advice in this post No one is going to be perfect in real life when you have to live with them.
