The missing black sheep - A cry for HELP!!!

I am the "lost" and now found camper from Wakarusa Music Festival '05. I have been posting on this board for almost two years now under another name but felt it was time to embrace the name I found for myself on this vision quest of a summer I have been on. My name is Rob JP Jensen and I am in the loony bin at the prostigious Silver Hill hospital in New Canaan CT, where I am also from. You can all send me your love in the form of e-mails Rob_Pluto@saintly.com or real, much more appreciated letters at my home address:

Rob Jensen
68 Turtleback Rd S
New Canaan, CT 06840

what made me go insane was this girl with whom I connected with only briefly until she was hidden from me by the Rainbow Family. I am proud to say that I have practiced pure form in my romantic shortcommings but I met this girl that would have made me cave. I now believe in Love at first sight I met her at the late night set of the Jazz Mandolin Project. I NEED TO FIND HER!!! I don't give a fuck about mutiple posts so this message can be carried far and wide in the hip circles so she knows that I am waiting for her and she is loved.
The contact info for her friends and even her name (which I horribly forgot Christie, or somethin like that) is in a book at a friends house in Ft. Collins CO. My deadhead friend's name is Gandalf and his wife is known as Rattlesname. I NEED TO FIND THEM AS WELL!!! I hope to be of some service in their band - playin music with them, cooking, baby sitting whatever as we travel arround in their Blue Jay tour bus.

PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!

 

umm..i welcome you.. but..i think before i'd attempt to find her for yyou, i think i;d want to know more about the nature of your ansanity..umm..this isnt wayfaring poet is it? fo you have a picture of her if i do decide its safe for her to attempt a reconnection?

 

I got diagnosed with Bi-polar after a weekend of eating some LSD, pretty stardard really

I don't have a picture of her. But she was the most beautiful girl at the late night show and I said to myself "what if I go and dance with the most beautiful girl here" and she melted in my arms. She has one brown dread that she heeps tied up in her hair, other than that she appears to be white but very tan I think she may be from Cali.

 

it seems to me like a pretty strong infatuation with someone you danced with once, & you dont know her name or where shes from..no offence, but..if i can track down this mystery girl..which is a huge if.. then what i tel hrer hey you remember dancing with some guy at some show a year or so ago? & if she even remembers, then what..well i say hes in a mental hospitol & is looking all over the internet trying to find you? no offence to you, you seem like a genuine & reasonable person..i think anyway.. but if i was a sister & someone told me that..i'd be changing my name, afraid to go outside..i dont mean that to sound harsh at all.. just reality.. i can tell you i've lost contact with sisters i felt a real connection with.. but i just figure if i'm meant to see them again, fate will bring them back into my life.. & its true..
so..i guess ineed to know..was this one dance? was it just 1 night together? or was it more & you just lost touch after the lsd incident?

 

Soaring Eagle has got a good point there. You have to figure out how she'd react and what the connection really was; for her as well as you.

If you're mentally ill (or even just having a rough patch) you need to work that out first, and trust in the universe that if you're supposed to hook up with her (or anyone else) that it will happen. In it's own time, in it's own way.

Trite as it sounds, there is something to the whole "let go and let god" approach.

 

I know the ordeal; I met a young girl once at Merlefest, six years ago...fell in love at first sight, got her S/N and everything. Tried the S/N, it was dead...used every public records search I could think of (knowing her first name and hometown), but never found her. I tried again every once and awhile, but still have found no way of contacting her.

Sometimes shit hurts and you just have to live with it.

 

If it's meant to be, it will be; if not, there's other fish in the ocean.

 

Precisely.

 

I half beieve in fate, half not. I know I can move mountians if you find it in your hearts to do so and make the wheels of fate push on down the line. I know there are more fish in the sea, but as I said I have practiced pure form so far and do not want to feel weak and break down and meet someone else, at least for one year. I am grateful for eveyones advice, but please remain positive. I'm not allowed to get on this forum from the hospital because it is blocked so I can only send my lines out on this weekend pass I am on.

 

i understand about pure love..however..my concern is how you define your "pure form" of love.. if it means being 100% dedicated to someone you met once for 5 minutes.. that sounds more like pure obssession..love takesa much deeeper understanding of the person..like her name for 1 thing.. love isnt based on how beaitiful she is.. its baed on the connection you feel based on your personalities.... had you even had a detailed conversation? do you know what she wants from life? how does sh feel about you?
what are you basing these feelings of pure love on?
the reality is..its easy to feel pure love for someone..without any real love being there..& obsession can feel like love.. think about stalkers..dont most stalkers claim to feel pure love for the ones they stalk? what about the guy who shot reagan..didnt he do that out of pure love?
if theres real love..wouldn't she ne lookijng for you too?

 

Twice in my life (that I know of), I've had guys 'fall in love' with me, just by watching me be myself. Both times I was unaware they were watching. I think it was strange as they knew nothing about me. Both had someone approach me for them and I said no to both - without ever finding out who they were or what they looked like. A relationship needs mutual attraction, yes, but there is so much more involved for two people to join together in love.


I've also had 'stalkers' twice, too and I was afraid they were similar types.

 

yea that was me..i fel in love with ya & was hidding in your closset last night..heeheehee

but you see her point..you met this girl once..and now your al over the internet trying to track her down without even so much asa name..if i was her & i saw that..i'd freak

 

hahahaha

The "stalkers" I ran into were right after I left my first husband - it freaked me out plenty - I was wondering about all men for awhile there - thank goodness most people are not like that. But I was alone and vulnerable for the first time in ages, I'm sure that was part of it.

 

Hmmm...I don't know. If I met some guy briefly,then found out later that he had been looking for me...well,that's kind of romantic. Or it could be romantic. If the guy seemed obsessed or if he did the same thing with other girls all the time..then it wouldn't be romantic. I guess it just depends on the circumstances involved. The mental ward thing would probably put her off more than anything. You may be a decent guy,wrongfully locked up...but unless she knows that for sure,it could be hard to convince her otherwise.

Good luck with it though...

 

What do you mean...the rainbow family hid her from you? That's kinda....strange.

 

i'm guessing he meant she hid with rainbow family..sonce rainbow family really has no existance to do anything

 

If she's hiding, that speaks volumes.

 

lol...kinda kills the romantic part

 

well wonder tried hiding from me for years.. but i hired a team of specialists to track her down & pump her full of mind controll drugs..& now i can even untiee her once in awhile

 

I feel so ashamed for it now.....after all,you are our cult leader