I am 15 for fucks sake. I had been toghether with my ex for 19.5 months and I just can't take anymore. It feels like I've been married for 10 years. Her dad died and she has been crying on me for the past 4 months. When I don't want to listen suddenly I'm a selfish bastard, I really cannot do anymore of this. It's not possible. I cannot listen to her moaning anymore. I am drained to a point where I cannot possibly concieve listen to another sylible of her. I cannot listen another second. I'm not saying you shouldn't listen or talk. 1 or 2 nights at a time is healthy for both partys. A week is a bit iffy. 4 months is way beyond iffy. You pay people for that sort of shit. Someone trained and qualified, not your 15 year old boyfriend. The lesson. Ease off. If you need space, get some space. Never play martyr and sacrifice you feelings for those of someone else. If you are honest with yourself then honesty to others comes easily. I really need a break from everything. Blessings Sebbi
always play martyr and sacrifice your feelings for someone else. some people are affected different by different things it might not have affected you as bad had your father died but dude c'mon what if it had been you in her place, how would you feal if your gf left you because you were sad. also if you would only be sad for a week if your father died i feal you need to find a way to get closer to him if possible or be honest with yourself and aknowledge it would take longer than a week. i havent seen my dad in 10 years because he is in jail and i am still sad about not seeing him and if he were to die i would be verry hurt for much longer than a week.
it's clear you dont love your girl at all. If you did, you wouldnt be whining about her saddness and her need to tell you what she feels. If you loved her, you'be her shoulder to cry on and would feel great.
love is partly about making sacrifices for happyness, if you don't love her then don't do this to her, it'll hurt her so much as you leave it longer and longer
Looking at it from the point of view of an outsider would you let a 15 year old be a grievance counsellor? I'm not saying not to make allowances. I'm not saying you shouldn't empathise with people, but don't over do it. You have your limits and when they are being pushed then ease off.
there is a difference in being a boyfriend and being a grievance counsellor. a grievance counsellor is a rich guy who is full of sh*t(from what i know ne way sorry to offend ne of you if you are one though). a boyfriend or even just a friend is someone full out of love, or should be.
Have you ever had counselling. I have had counselling. My granny is a counsellor and I have a friend of a friend who is a counsellor, they isn't full of shit. I am told that what a counsellor does is listen and release what they listen to. What you are refering to is the stereotype of someone who analyses peoples heads. Most counsellors don't do that anymore because it's pretty widely believed by that circle that empathy does better than saying what they should be don't and it is also believed that analysing peoples heads normally blocks empathy. Blessings Sebbi
4 months is an excessive time to still be breaking into tears on a daily basis... I'm not saying that one couldn't still be sad, but this girl needs to get a grip.
look just because y'all dont have the same viewpoints as the chick dont mean she is wrong for doing it. it hurts when someone dies. i had a friend die a few years ago and there are some nights when i still cry over it and i am not one to cry. mind you this was not even my father this was simply one of my friends. and yes i have been to a counsellor...i find a friend is much better comfort and there should be no need for someone like them if other people would be true friends. what you are told, exactly
Speaking of conselors, why don't you suggest that she gets one? Don't tell her, "Hey, I'm sick of you whining." Four months is really long... But you need to still be there for her.
