"I'm not a feminist"

Discussion in 'Women's Forum' started by xthevalkyriex, Jun 23, 2004.

  1. vinceneilsgirl

    vinceneilsgirl Member

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    I'm not a feminist because of the fact that there are feminists out there who actually attack women for choosing to work in the adult industries and they attack women for choosing to be wives and moms. I thought feminism was about allowing women to have choices but apparently for these feminists it's not. I also don't like feminists who blame men for everything. I love men!

    I'm a womens rights advocate, not a feminist. Also, I hope you know that women went to college before feminism came along.
     
  2. feministhippy

    feministhippy Member

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    So the fact that a few people do something condemns the entire movement?
     
  3. vinceneilsgirl

    vinceneilsgirl Member

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    Absolutely not, but until feminists start taking a stand against the women who pretend to be feminists and yet attack other women I won't be a feminist.
     
  4. xthevalkyriex

    xthevalkyriex Member

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    There are many different types of feminists. I personally am considered a "sex positive feminist", though I don't really like that term because I don't believe any feminist can really be "sex negative". Basically, I support women who choose to work in the adult industry. I also support a woman's choice to stay at home and be a mom, if that's what she really wants to do. Feminism to me is about allowing women the freedom to do whatever they want to.

    As far as feminism not being the reason women could attend college-sorry, it is. Feminism dates back to the 1800s, with women like Mary Wollstonecraft (spelling?). Women could NOT attend college until the pioneer feminists started demanding that they should be able to.
     
  5. vinceneilsgirl

    vinceneilsgirl Member

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    I'm a history major, and while it may be true that some in the U.S. didn't go to college, they still got a good education. Some of them were taught at home by tutors.

    In Europe, women of the aristocracy did attend college before the 1800s.

    And even if they hadn't been allowed to I see no difference between being taught at home and going to an actual college. It's still a good education.
     
  6. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    This is a silly, stereotypical, sttitude. Although I am a SAHM (and run my own business) and don't beleive in the draft for anyone, men OR womyn, I consider myself a feminist. If you saw me you would think I was one of the most femine womyn you had ever met. I don't have "Masculine" traits. Whatever that means. Just what does that mean? I know people who think a womyn who can argue or hold her own in an intelligent discussion is being "masculine."
     
  7. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    Unfortunately, too many people associate "feminism" with radical, zero population growth, housewife haters of the 70s. This is NOT what feminism IS, yet too many people, who haven't done thier homework think it is. I don't associate myself with this type of "feminism" at all. Equality, as well as the right to choose what you do with your life, including staying home to raise children. One of the main problems with 70s style feminism (and this was a short abberation, in a long history of feminism) was the idea that "housewives" and mothers were the enemy. I canceled my subscription to MS because of their complete inabiity to recognise motherhood, pregnancy and breastfeeding as feminist issuses. This type of feminism (Betty Freidan type radical, 70s style, housewife haters) has actually made it HARDER for families. It helped eliminate alimony, made it almost impossible for one income families to survive and made life only easier on the highly educated and the already rich and the childless, and men who didn't want to take care of thier families. NOT the actual goal of feminism.

    Feminism should be for everyone. Not just the childless. not just the rich, not just those for womyn.
     
  8. sadeyedlady

    sadeyedlady Member

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    When people say they're not feminists but still believe in women's rights, it makes me feel like it doesn't matter, we're both for the same cause. They're just confused about semantics and history.

    Even if they want to call themselves "cunts" who believe in equality between the genders, it doesn't matter. After all, action, not intellectual masturbation, is what makes a difference.
     
  9. dotadave

    dotadave Member

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    We are, just don't post in gyno threads with things like "Ewww, That's gross!" as they add nothing to the conversation.
     
  10. dotadave

    dotadave Member

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    The same applies to married men, why aren't they forced to cover up? This gender role of "he holy vehical of your family" is another way of saying "pregnant kitchen slave."
     
  11. Glower Child

    Glower Child Member

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    Exactly. The word "feminism" itself can be construed as sexist. If it really denoted equality, it could easily be called "masculinism." But would that fly? No way.
    It can't just be about trying to "catch up" with men on some imaginary ladder anymore. They need help too. What about those American high school boys in 2001 who were scared to death of the draft because they knew a war was coming? In such a case it is advantageous to be a woman. And then there's those horrible stereotypes about men wanting to beat and rape everyone and then go off and not cry somewhere. That's stupid too and just creates more fear and suspicion.

    If feminism is really about equality of both sexes, it would have a better following with a new name.
     
  12. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    Yeah, but they are then taking the benefits of the hard work of men and womyn from the last century and not taking any of the responsibility. They have no idea that womyn were once forced to quit their jobs if they got pregnant, or even married. Once couldn't vote. One had a choice of about 4 jobs, all low paying, that they could choose from if they wanted to work. Once couldn't one land or sign a contract. Ect ect.

    I have some resentment for those who haven't bothered to do some history work and find out what womyn once lived through, then live their lives, all benefitted by feminism and cleverly (they think) say, "Oh, I'm not some ugly, hairy, lesbain feminist." While, if they lived even 25 years ago, woulnd't have half the things they have now.
     
  13. Megara

    Megara Banned

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    you make it sound like men have lived on easy street for the past 4,000 years and women have been slaves. Most men lived as dogs just like women. Joe serf in england wasnt given much, if anymore rights than jane serf was. While it is true men have been free longer than women, people need to read history and see how mankind has struggled against oppression...that would be more effective.
     
  14. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    I said nothing about men "living on easy street" never thought that, either. But in the recent past, it was still more difficult for womyn. I am not talking about serfs in feudal England, I was talking about trying to get a job or a credit card in 1975.
     
  15. jiimaan

    jiimaan Banned

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    Yeah, you did say something about people not doing their "history work" and not knowing what it was like for women "even 25 years ago". This suggests that you were, in fact, making reference to the more distant past.
     
  16. bjorky

    bjorky Member

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    I couldn't agree more. I think such people possibly don't realise that these comments have serious implications:metaphorically turning back the clock and undoing a lot of good work.Whenever I vote I remember that women literally died for that right.

    Whenever anyone tells me they are not a feminist i just ask them if they vote?. Its a very one-dimensional question but it makes them think for a second.

    I should also say I grew up surrounded by boys and men who were very enlightened on this subject.

    Peace
     
  17. Megara

    Megara Banned

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    i think the same thing when i vote, that men died for my right to vote.

    THen agian, both men and women have died for both our rights to vote: i.e. ww2.
     
  18. Piper82

    Piper82 Member

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    In the United States the first state college to admit women was University of Iowa in 1855 I believe. Most women did not receive a good education until the 1900s, and for many more less advantaged, it was in the mid 1900s before they even had the opportunity. And how can you see no difference between being taught at home and going to an actual college? How can one possibly receive an adequate education from an in home tutor? Just the fact that they were denied the right to attend college is a huge difference.
     
  19. Phrivolous

    Phrivolous Member

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    Well, i really hate to always "stick it to the man" but this time it suits the topic. A lot of women wouldn't touch feminism with a ten foot pole because they have heard over and over again the criticisms that feminists face. And yes it stems from men, because it is these women's overbearing husbands and fathers that have taught them over the years that feminists are "crazy butch lesbians."

    I had an ex-boyfriend whose father was a vietnam veteran and whenever he spoke of women in the military he would call them "Femme-Nazis." (can you believe that?!?) Anyway, as much of a "feminist" that I am, these words started to get to me and after awhile this started to warp my thinking. Essentially, comments from this ignorant man and many others, made me think, "wow, maybe the whole feminism thing is over the top and maybe we should cool it." BUT then i got knocked back into my senses somehow and realized: WHAT THE HELL AM I SAYING?? In this day and age, women are STILL ranked second on the list of overall importance.

    I'm not asking to be first, I'm just asking for equality (if there is such a thing). Equality in every sense of the word except in the case of the draft. (Because honestly, the draft isn't an equal practise to begin with.) Really the reason for most men being against feminism stems from them needing to be in power. (Example: all the of the presidents of my country that i call home (USA) have been male.) And women don't want to be rejected by the men, so they fall into the trap of anti-feminism......:confused:

    AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP THE BRAINWASHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  20. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    What did WWII have to do with anyone's right to vote?
     

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