Her love is like wine, dancing on the vine, I'm on her ship, but she won't drop me a line, Waiting for a sign from up above, Living in the endless summer of her love Waiting for her to get on her knees, Watching the color change in the trees, Asking for a sign from up above, Living in the forever autumn of her love Endless Summer, Forever Autumn, Now on to her cold winter and her promising spring. Listening gor her to make a sound, As the snow falls on the ground, Begging for a sign from up above, Living in the eternal winter of ther love Seeing if she has anything to say, While the grass gets greener every day, Pleading for a sign from up above, Living in the everlasting spring of her love. Eternal Winter Everlasting Spring Her lovely year is finally Complete, I am one.
ethreal man,..... I love the seasonal metaphors you use. Must be one damn good woman ya got there. Damn,...I need that kind of inspiration. Good job. Crank em out man. I already have a melody and intro lead idea on this
Actually, the woman i got inspiration from was woman herself. I have the utmost respect for women. If it wasn't for them, we wouldn't be here, right?
Yup... coudn't agree more. Woman is the life giver the ying to my jacked up yang. The blessed peacemaker and the only really good thing in this world worth living for. Good on ya!
Great poem man, Very intelligent metephors. You must have a good head on your shoulders This part made me laugh. Sorry.. You could just take it that way.
I thought this was going to be about that Beach Boys greatest hits album from the 70s also titled 'Endless Summer', so I was pretty disappointed-- but not really, because I have pretty low expectations of most of the stuff posted here. Anyway, it doesn't really rhyme very well... and it reminds me of some dumb cross between lyrics to songs by the Doors and Cream, but without any music to help them seem cool. Your metaphors are boring, predictable and approached without even a shred of originality. And why did you start with summer?? The year starts in spring... it doesn't even make sense. Also, a lot of it seems to be about sex, and doesn't really strike me as being particularly romantic or respectful of women at all. I mean, typically someone who respects women doesn't wait for them to get down on their knees-- but then again, most of the time when a guy says he respects women he's only letting his dick make him say what he thinks women want to hear, and typically doesn't really have any respect for anything except maybe guys who get laid a lot. Anyway, I'm sure if you're looking to get laid then writing something like this and showing it to some dumb girl will probably be enough, but if you're trying to write something interesting, then I would recommend writing honestly about what you really want and not recycling tired, predictable images without bringing some kind of fresh perspective to them.
Just so you know, I wrote this when I was 12, so of course it's not going to be poetically shattering as something by Leonard Cohen, or Dylan Thomas...I certainly didn't write it just to get laid, and if I did, then I failed.
say what?? seriously?? that's amazing for 12, i was still writing haikus about snowflakes when i was 12. damn. hahaha.
