So, tell me about yourselves

Discussion in 'Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans, etc.' started by Dark Bowser, Aug 30, 2005.

  1. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    I hope you don't mind me asking, but as a non-gay and being fascinated with the psychology of sexual orientation, I hope to have a room-mate with an atypical sexual orientation. Until that happens, you guys'll do. You don't have to answer if you don't want to, so don't get too uncomfortable. I'll save the more.....perhaps offensive questions for later, in case you don't think you can handle it. Well, anyways, enough of that. Onto the questions!

    I just have to ask, why did you decide to become gay? I guess I'm just asking why you couldn't be straight if you wanted to. Are you comfortable with your sexuality? In other words, do you like being gay? Someone in an online group of mine recently "came out" to me, and said he doesn't like being gay. This just makes me think, "hmmmmm........" So does anyone else feel the same way? When did you first think you were gay? What's your opinion of heteros in general and what they say about you? Well, really, I'd just like to hear your stories with that information incorporated into it. That's about it for the inoffensive ones. The others, which are only two or three or so, might be offensive to some, so like I said, I'll hold off until someone says they're okay in answering those questions.

    And thanks for answering, to all those that do! :)
     
  2. RxHEAD

    RxHEAD Member

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    I'm too tired, poor, sick, and in horrible pain to even fight this one or get angry. Mostly oppressed and depressed and mentally ill discarded into the trash by the government for being disabled. So really this one is not all that difficult to answer as I am used to doing these little experiments or clinical trials with my indegent mental illness. I dont really say I like being gay. I dont like being hated on and judged without ever being talked to or seen. That I am gay I would say I am yes gay not by choice only by hormones and am not exclusivally gay as have had sex with women as well as men. I've been sexually abstinant for over 2 years now so it is more than sex to be alternative lifestyle. To me it is about Love which I dont believe I have the ability of intimate love or companionship male or female anymore. RX
     
  3. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    I figured that's what the other guy meant when he said that.

    I'm sorry about your pain. It's hard being different, isn't it? But I believe we can all overcome our shortcomings if we try! It is a matter of will power. But there, there, want a hug?
     
  4. RxHEAD

    RxHEAD Member

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    No, don't need no hugs. Just some sort of an adjustment of my prescription medications and I'm not really all that different in the ways of a guy, just a crazed agoraphobic who cant deal with other humans. So I put trust in God as he is the only one I can say ain't never let me down. The only one other than myself that is able to feel what I feel when I am able to feel. Peace Out-Rx
     
  5. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    You'd refuse a hug? :( That makes me sad.

    Oh well, it's good to have faith in the Lord. Anyhow, would anyone else please contribute? Pretty please? With sprinkles on top? :D
     
  6. Obituary~Birthday

    Obituary~Birthday Member

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    i didn't 'decide' it. this is just how i am. how ive always been as long as i can remember. even when i was in love with a girl, it wasn't physical. the thought of doing physical things with girls (other than kissing) makes me sort of cringe. i was a pervy child. i'd always look straight to the mens underwear section of my mothers catalogues. but hey, i was like 5, how was i supposed to know?
     
  7. james q

    james q Uranian

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    ah another agoraphobic. me 2. it's been about 6 weeks now and i've hardly gone out. scary really. but i'm much more comfortable atm dealing with the world from inside my flat rather than outside. the person who posted this thread is annoying me: i think he/she has got some sort of hidden agenda. i'm waiting to see what it is: christian, new age, kinky... we'll see
     
  8. james q

    james q Uranian

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    know what you mean o~b. i was the same. i used to love hanging round in the change rooms at the swimming pool from the time i could learn to swim (about 6) and i loved thinking about men while stroking an erection which i got plentifully in those days. as for it being a choice: it was never a conscious choice made in this lifetime, imo. it's like rx said above. and please poster stop assuming that being gay is some kind of condition we seek cure for, presumably from you. god, we get a silly troller in here once a month, without fail.
     
  9. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    I thank you for the comments.......even the......hmmmm......rude ones.


    I apologize if I'm annoying you. What is it, exactly, that's the problem? I already gave my purpose. I am interested in the psychology of it. People have always interested me, but I have lately become more interested in the psychology of sexual orientation.

    :eek: j/k Lol. :)

    This has to be the comment that bothers me the most. I can understand where you might think I'm saying homosexuality is a problem, but I never really said that. You ever hear the quote, "When you assume, you make an ASS out of me and you."? I am trying to be courteous and such, but please do not be rude and assume things of me. I am most certainly not trying to give you a cure. :confused: It's not like I'm a real psychologist. I'm in my first semester of college for cryin' out loud!

    Once again, please remain civil. If I can manage it, then you certainly should be able to too. 'K? :(
     
  10. james q

    james q Uranian

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    youre right u know. sorry for the rude remark, i was out of order and i take it back. :)

    ok, here's what u said:
    i take shortcomings as being synonymous with problems in that they're seen as something bad u wanna try to overcome and get rid of. that's part of what annoyed me. the other part that annoyed me is that it sounds patronising, esp when u say that to a guy u don't know and who's probably a lot more experienced in life than u are. if u want to come here and investigate us or conduct some kind of research u need to learn how to make the subjects feel at ease and not feel like some insects in a jar being analysed. be aware that incivility can come in many forms.
     
  11. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    Thanks. That's all I ask. *hugs j00* :D

    I figured you'd bring this up and so I'm prepared. I was talking about overcoming problems in general. You gays say that you get dealt a bad hand, and I am of the opinion that the Lord gives us tests for our strength and courage. I am not debating whether or not homosexuality is a sin right now. In fact, I saw that one topic entitled Gay Christians and one dude there seemed to bring up some good points. Even if he's wrong, he's intelligent and has some good points, even about the bible in general. I just brought up the "shortcomings" part because since some of you gays seem unhappy with your sexual orientation, I just simply brought that up. I apologize if I offended you.

    That almost sounded rude, but you are right, I am only 18 after all. But wisdom does not necessarily equal age. Some of us young 'uns have good advice too, you know. I apologize if I'm sounding patronizing, but like I said, I'm just trying to be empathetic and helpful. I was also in a bit of a humorous mood so I joked around a fair amount too. It's just now you're kinda forcing me to take a serious tone. But it's okay, since you've cooled off. I don't hold grudges. :)

    And I guess I already pretty much covered whatever else you said. Remember, I'm not a professional psychologist or anything, and while it is kind of private research, it's also not official, and I'd rather be loose and joking, rather than boring and erudite, you know?
     
  12. james q

    james q Uranian

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    u wouldn't say to a black person u must try to overcome your shortcomings (ie being black) using willpower, so don't spin that line here, ok?
    anyway, whatever, get on with the slutty questions then, that's all i'm here for ;)
     
  13. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    Damn it all to hell! I had a lot written up and then I hit a wrong button and lost it all!! I ****ing hate it when that happens! :mad:

    *rolls up into a fetal position with thumb in mouth and rocks back and forth*

    I'll try to write it up tomorrow. I really need to get off and do some homework. I've been slacking off with you and other guys too. :&
     
  14. james q

    james q Uranian

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    ok off u go. btw is u boy or is u goil? (need 2 know if i'll bother flirting with u)
     
  15. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    Okay, lemme try typing it up again.


    But you can't change skin color. *Michael Jackson shows up* I stand corrected. But seriously, do you get what I mean? Even though this is a different issue, I'll take it on! *puts on the boxing gloves and hops around, but then begins dancing like a ballerina. Yes, a ballerina!! :mad: Okay, that can still apply to a black person. Unfortunately, discrimation still exists; not nearly as much, but it does indeed exist. A black person has to deal with it from time to time, and others might try to keep him down because they don't like black people. But he can go to college, get a doctorate and will probably have an awesome, high-paying job. I mean, how many doctors are unemployed? People like doctors because they have a lot of education. And this is how a black person can, even with the cards he's dealt, still succeed in this country.

    Anyways, that's way off-topic, so onto your next sentence:

    Alright, if you're sure you're ready for the offensive ones......Why would you want to take it in the ass? That more than anything else is what grosses me out about homosexuality. I mean, the last place I want something inside of me is my butt. I mean, that's gotta hurt, or at least be uncomfortable. Personally, I find the butt to be the nastiest part of the body. Sure, the whole body is gross on the microscopic level, but still. And its not just you gay males, it's some heteros too. I don't get the whole anal sex deal. Also, certainly, someone's ass is the last place I want to put myself in. I don't get what it is with even heteros' deal with the butt like you can always hear someone say something like, "Would you look at that fine ass? I could just squeeze it!" All I can think of is ewwwwww.

    As for a less offensive one, what do you think of heterosexuals? Do you dislike them for their close-mindedness or anything?

    I'm planning to join some group at college called HOMAGE, which is like a Straight-Gay Alliance or something. I don't think I have anything to contribute but I'm interested in learning what happens at those meetings. Besides buttsecks, that is. ;) I'd also like to talk to some homosexuals in real life, get their opinions, see what they think, etc. I am also curious how heteros treat you guys these days. I don't mean just in the media, I mean typical guys. Of course, guys in that group are probably more open-minded than most but oh well. No hurt in trying, right? I spend too much time on the computer anyway. :p

    I guess I also have to ask again, you really don't think you could change if you wanted to? I guess I'm curious if a gay person really could become straight if they wanted to, and also want to learn about the nature vs. nurture argument by asking you questions on if you think you were just born that way, or maybe something in your childhood.

    Woah! What brought this up?! :eek: I'm a guy, but I'm kinda ugly so you wouldn't be attracted to me. You are a gay guy, right? :p But I can assure you, I am not interested. Sorry. :( Can I just buy you a coffee or something?
     
  16. james q

    james q Uranian

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    i'll say. i think u might be a tad confused, love. what i meant by that remark is 1) there is nothing wrong about being gay just as there's nothing wrong with being black (but a hell of alot right imho: love the physique and body style); 2) you wouldn't say to a black guy change your skin colour and then all your problems will be solved, so don't say that to us: we couldn't change even if we wanted to, period. our sexuality is not the problem it's attitudes like this that oppress.
    i hope that's in syllables clear enough.

    is that it? good god man, that's not offensive. that's a common sense question. if u change your mind one day and decide you'd like to explore and get fucked you wanna know in advance, right? as has been discussed here many times there are ways to make it pain-free. some go for the pain btw but i'm not one of those guys. it's the stimulation against the prostate wall that i like. yeah i can understand it if u find it gross. alot of ppl do: even some gay ppl i know have got a problem with it. i think that has to do more with how you were socialised (your parents' attitude to the naked body and bodily functions) and potty training and things like that rather than sexuality. for many of us the sexual urge and desire is so strong it negates any repulsion of the anus and its function we may have. in fact i have grown to adore the arsehole, so u might have guessed. it's a part of the wonder of the human body that despite looking hideous at a microscopic level, or even a few centimetres under the skin for that matter, we can still love and desire it with such passion and fantasy. that's a wonderful mystery worth going nuts over.

    i take them on a case by case basis.

    let me be the judge of that.

    honey, it's flirting. it's not real. it's only happening on the screen and in our heads. u can be anyone in cyberspace. anyone at all. so yes i'd like that coffee. where are we going?
     
  17. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    Ain't gonna argue that. Like I said before, I'm not here to argue if homosexuality is a sin or whatever.

    I wouldn't? :p But seriously, dear boy, I'm not saying that homosexuality is wrong and it's the only thing that makes your life miserable. Of course it's not going to solve everything. If it did, heteros would have perfect lives, but last I checked, heterosexuals don't have it so great either. It's just they don't have to deal with as much discrimination(let's not bring other irrelevant things into this like skin color and such, you know what I mean) :)

    But why wouldn't you change? Why wouldn't you try? If homosexuality gives you those problems(yes, we all know it doesn't solve everything), then why not try to change? Haven't you tried?

    Well, glad you think so. I just wanted to make sure. This is a typical question a troller asks after all, OMG y do u gies tak it in teh ass!111 its nastee and stuf.

    Sure. But I have no intention of becoming homosexual. Sorry. :(

    Yeah, still sounds nasty.

    That's always good. What do you think of people of some other non-hetero sexual orientations?

    LOL! No, trust me, I'm quite ugly.

    I was gonna do something funny, but I gotta go soon. Well, as long as that's understood with the flirting....I dunno. Not Starbucks; way too expensive. Some place cheaper. Then of course bloody butt-secks afterwards. That's a must! ;)
     
  18. SageDreamer

    SageDreamer Senior Member

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    I didn't decide to become gay. It's just that I've always been drawn to my own sex. I even went through one of those dreadful "ex-gay" programs which didn't work. At least for me, IT WAS NOT A CHOICE. Please forgive the capital letters, but I am running low on patience with people who claim that it was.

    I'm comfortable with my sexuality, but not necessarily with everyone else's response to it. I know that I'm gay. I feel good about it. I've got a great relationship with a wonderful man.

    Heteros are a mixed bag. Some of them are OK, and some of them are clueless or nasty. Of course, I can probably say the same thing about people of all orientations.
     
  19. Dark Bowser

    Dark Bowser Member

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    I used to believe it was. I am being persuaded by evidence that it is indeed genetic. You guys, my other online buddy who "came out to me" all say it wasn't a choice, I recently read a touching story by a mother who's son was a transexual. I really enjoyed it, but have been unable to find other stories like it. I have been doing introspection and know that my sexual orientation has always been what it is. I don't think I could change that, so if I can't change my own, then I begin to wonder if homos could change their own.

    Well, I guess it's a good thing you're happy. :)

    Indeed you could. I appreciate your comments and I thank you for sharing. :)
     
  20. Casey

    Casey Member

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    I didn't choose to be gay either. I dont claim to know why or anything all i know is that it wasn't a choice more....a natural attraction to other women. I realised when i was 12 but in hindsight i was always gay. I've never felt the need to have sex with a guy to justify what comes naturally to me.

    If by 'becoming straight' you mean could i sleep with men, then yeah i dont see why it wouldn't be possible. However if you mean, could i suddenly stop being attracted to women and instead be attracted sexually to men, then no. If i started dating guys then I would be denying who i really am, and some guy would be wasting his life with me when he would never have the most simple primative things from me such as feeling like he was truley disired, or feeling that he could satisfy me. To spend a lifetime leading someone on and living a lie, to waste the small chances of happiness in life, to go through life miserable rather than face the facts....those things have got to be the biggest sins of all.

    I've always been comfortable with it. I like certain aspects of it. I like making my gf smile, i like holding her hand, i like being in love and having someone speacil love me back. I love the way a womans body looks, and feels and smells. I love waking up in the mornings and feeling lucky to be the one to watch her sleep. The only aspect i dont like about being gay is not being able to have a baby and for it to have both our genes. That and having ppl think gay relationships are a cancer on society. Kinda having to constantly justify that it hasn't been a choice for many ppl who are gay.

    I dont have a bias oppinion of hetrosexuals. I tend to take ppl on thier character. Though i do have a bias of some gay ppl who add to the portrayal that we all use drugs and sleep around and have unprotected sex. Because its a label thats hard to shake off and i get sick of being lumped in with the generalisations made by (mainly) religous folks.


    Casey x
     

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