Can anybody help me

is there anyone home?

im trying to be drama free but although i try my best in dan's and my relationship, somthing bad happened again and i need out.

can somoene PLEASEEE save my life

 

And HOW would I do that?

 

well...imagining oneself as a completely unemotional being and using that power of imaginitive intention might help a little...

 

That should work. Otherwise call Spiderman. But call him on his mobile because he has free nights & weekends.

 

unfortunally im being way too literal and prolly tomorrow ill think it's my fault.

since 2000. when dan and i were together on and off, mostly on... got married just over two years ago.. it was cooll...

even though after six months, he used to hit me... back when we sold drugs, it was okay cause you know... i wasnt a victim. so niave. HE PAID ME TO LOSE THAT JOB.

but he kept beating me. i cheated on him. more then once though i usually just say it is once.

we both grew up.... i thought we both changed, ya know? we wouldnt do that, i wouldnt do that.

tonight though, cause i drank and listens to his belittling comments all night (never once said a mean thing back, cept that he was beign irrational and worries me...cept, i guess that was too mean cause it's true)

earlier, when the argument started, i was in the bathroom, sitting on the toilet, - he threw a ketchip bottle for no reasonable reason.

then it got worse about 10 mins. ago, i was in the broom about..

he came in calling me a whore, after i was raped n all *read journal for a short version*, beating me on top the head and i didtn say much

he JUST FINALLY went to bed. but ya know? my mom (i didnt grow up with my dad) LOOOVES him. ya know, he's so sweet and normal. unlike me.

i dont have a job.

i dont know what to do.

id like to get out. im afraid ill change my mind/.

im scared!

 

basically.. i need and want help soooo bad.i need someone to take me in., ill cook, clean, look for a job asap
tomorrow i may be stuborn but im just sayin

this is please

if anyoen can help me

 

break Dan's kneecaps, may solve the problem..

 

hes fine if we're sober but the second he had three beers at the restaurent (and he got a toleranace), that is when he threw the ketchup bottle/.

despite the hitting., the pain (me shutting the fuck up cause he scares me), i shut up more with his comments. the things he says.

 

yeah right. cops AND dan hate me. i aient going to jail, which i would.

 

well if ya can get yaself to aussie land,, ya could sleep in the lounge room i guess, spare bedroom is in use by a sweet lady in the same crap

 

damn! i wish you lived close enough to hitch!

 

real men don't hold their drinks to well, must be a man thing..

 

i just hope i have strength to not back down. dipshit knows that i have changed but dont have a job right now.

i take care of everything round here, his lunches, dinner (i make good ones), dishes, cleaning, etc.

and i do other things for money or small amounts but...

he dont care...

to him HE WORK s FULL TIME AT 18 AN HOUR. you cant get a decent PT job.

oh who cares? im just sick

 

l'm sure he has co-dependant behaviours..

 

i know he has asshole behaviors that i want to killl

 

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