So I'm not very popular with the ladies, or anyone for that matter. I'm not much of a social creature. However I do know a couple girls. One, who while I must admit isn't quite attractive to me (I try not to be shallow), WAN'TS ME BADLY!!! She's had boyfriend problems in the past, and has quite a strong sexual drive with nobody to help her with it. Even when I'm joking about anything sexual, she fires up. I've suggested she try masturbation, but she thinks it's gross if she does it to herself. She says it's perfectly fine if a guy does it for her, though. Anyways I hang out with her when I have time, and when it gets late and she gets hot, I keep talking myself out of it every time. I don't know what keeps stopping me! I want it deep down, but I'm still a virgin and she's been around a few times. That thought in the back of my head keeps bothering me, and also that it's MY virginity!!! I know it's questionable to be proud of, but I sometimes feel that I want to lose it with the right person, not someone who I'll probably fail at pleasing for a while. I just hate thinking that I'm always going to be new at things like this. I've only had 1 serious relationship in my life, and it only lasted about a month because she moved away. If I went with her, I could have had everything I ever wanted! But I screwed it up and now I might not ever find someone like her again. So back to the present, this girl kissed me once, and honestly it felt like kissing a bowl of Jell-O. She's not the skinny/slender type, and could lose a few pounds. (Please don't yell at me for this, It's just the way i feel.) The only reason it botheres me so much is that it's like a constant reminder of the american filth- the abundance of fat people, McDonalds, etc. It disgusts me! Now it's not like this girl's that fat or anything, but she has slightly let go of herself (stretch marks). (honestly sometimes she reminds me of a chipmunk/squirrel -_-) So I need your advice. What should I do? If I decided to be with her, I would probably get all the sex I could handle. But I don't know if I would be happy with myself! It's so confusing. Please help! I appreciate it!
One negative factor you should think about is she won't masturbate. Now, what the hell? Then she probably wont do anything but like normal sex, no kinky, which would absolutely suck, I don't know for sure, but if she wont touch her own damn pussy it hard to imagine what she would touch. I wouldn't lose my virginity with somebody I wasn't sure of (didn't find attracive or have a serious relationship). I think even if a person isn't attractive, if you have a good enough relationship with them you'll grow accustom to them, and feel comfortable touching their body, and then when it comes to sex, you'll actually be aroused, but where as if you had seen a picture of them before you met them you would really like it. Now, I have to ask, is this girl fat, like I seem to have an idea of what your saying (I've seen girls do that) or is she obese (30 lbs overweight or more)? Or can you tell? If your fat while your 18 you'll probably become more fat even obese, and if your obese you'll become more obese, if your not fat or obese you'll probably become fat, in our society anyway, as you exercise less and less and eat more and more. I don't think you should do it unless you really like her as a person, and also you 18, you could wait to lose your virginity.
Yeah she's like a Nazi when it comes to kinky. She once told me that she wouldn't give head. Yeah you have the right idea. She's not obese, but could get there in no time. She just has a little extra pudge, imo.[/QUOTE] True. I myself am delightfully skinny, and I don't forsee any fat making it's way into this man's ass. I refuse to eat at fast food joints, for that purpose alone. Yeah, but what I'm not sure of is my ability to find another woman. I do like her as a person, and forget about appearances when things heat up, but then again she does tend to be annoying sometimes. (she has this thing for using an extremely high pitch voice when she calls on the phone. It's hard to listen with a bloody ear, you know? It's like, "Hey how's it goin omg hihihihi squeeeeee!!!! kitty* I LOOOVE you!!! omgomgomg!!1!shift!!!") *they started calling me kitty for no reason. It's been like that for 3 years.
hold off for something that feels completely right, you dont want to look back & regret the way u lost your virginity, because that can affect future relationships this girl seems to have body image issues if she finds touching her own body to be gross (skinny girls with issues are the same so it has nthing to do with actual weight, which is just shallow if u allow that to affect your opinions) but to me it seems like she uses sex as a form of vaklidation..like she can make her issues disapear a momment if she can just get a guy hot for her.. so theres no real feelings behhind it you dont want to lose your virginity just to make her feel good about her body do u? unless ofcourse you really really care about her she can find someone else to fill thos e needs, & i bet ya even if u did sleep with her in no time shed just need to find someone else to make her feel ok about herself theres nothing wrong with waiting for the right girl..believe me, when the times right you'll both be glad u did on to other things..u need to work on what ever it is that makes u not get along with people well perhaps its attitude or insecurities or your own self image issues?
If you aren't attracted to her, don't do it. It wouldn't be fair to her, or to you. Everyone I know who lost their virginity with someone who didn't mean something to them (like love) has regretted it.... and I think you would come to regret it in time. Just a quick note about stretch marks. A lot of women have stretch marks. Puberty isn't all that easy on us. For example, I have stretch marks on my breasts. In one year I went from being flat chested to being a D cup. Skin can't adapt and stretch that quickly, which results in stretch marks. So, it's not only "fat" people who have stretch marks.
if you don't find her attractive, don't go for it. In all honesty, I'd be a worried about a woman who refuses to masturbate. I understand preferring to have a partner around, but out and out refusing to masturbate is gonna lead to some problems in the relationship (plus you said she doesn't give head, eep, two reasons to not pursue a sexual relationship with her for your first time) I'm not even going to touch on your fat people comments and stretch mark bits, you know that was unnescessary and rude to those of us who are wide and have stretch marks.
Ahaha, that made me laugh a little... Why don't you et at them if you think it's good? I've been living off Mc D., BK and KFC (lunch and dinner) for a week now while I was in barcelona, and usually I don't eat that healthy either (tho a lot more healthy than that week in barce), and I still have my beloved six pack and weigh 155 lbs; 5'10-11 inches... But yeah, if you even have to ask people about it you're obviously not sure enough to do it either
Ehh... I wouldn't do it if I were you. Your choice though. That's true about the people with stretchmarks, it's not only fat people who have them. I have them on my shoulders, I don't know how they got there... from puberty I guess... I'm not fat or anything though, but not skinny either. I'm about 190 and 5'11", so yeah I guess I am a little overweight, but I've been told that you can't really tell. Most people are just a little overweight though, even though it doesn't make much of a differrence in how they look. Once you get like 30-50 LBS overweight THEN it can make a differrence.. but ehh.. I need to lose some weight anyways I guess. -_-
Oh my bad, I just figured that since you said that was the reason why you didn't eat it, you might still like the taste...
So all the sex you can handle isnt all its cracked up to be, you've got the rest of your life to worry about it. Wait untill your really ready, like maried or at least seriously feeling for a person.
I agree with the others, but perhaps for other reasons. I consider sex to be a sacred expression of love. If you can not give that love openly, wait until you can. Sex changes everything! You can not predict how she will behave after you have sex. If you find her annoying now, you might be in for a very unpleasent time. Also, as a virgin, your chances of carrying HPV are low. Your "girlfriend" is almost certainly a carrier. Almost every sexually active person in this country carries HPV regardless of tesing. The tests can not tell you that you do not have the virus. The tests will sometimes tell a person that they do have it, but that is not even very accurate. There is absolutely no way that any sexually active person can honestly call themselves disease free. Perhaps next month, you will meet a most wonderful woman to whom you pass a virus that could cause her cancer. I am not trying to scare you away from sex, I just want you to be properly informed. HPV is one of those issues that most folks would rather ignore because it gets in the way of their good time, but it is incredibly common and completely uncurable. Once you have the virus, it is with you for life. I will not get involved with anyone of limited sexual experience because i do not want to pass it on. If anyone has had unprotected vaginal or oral sex more than twice in their life, the chance that they carry HPV is greater than 90%. Sex is awesome as an expression of love! You will find many partners in your walk through life. There is not one soulmate for us, there are scores of potential soul mates roaming out there for you to find. Love, and if required, move on and love again, but do it wisely and kindly! Namaste Jim
