Mom has questions

thanks and actually i'm 15 lol. think this is crazy check out the thread about the kid spitting up blood and wondering if its anything bad lol.

 

exactly.. ive had a job since i was 15 years old now im turning 18 in december.. i pay for everything i buy w/ my OWN money. damn i dont think i could ever ask my mom for money... thats just wrong man..

 

Yes pot can and does have negative side effects. What needs to be realized here, though, is this kids problems are derived mainly from pot prohibition, not pot. If pot were legal, he would have no excuse not to get a job. It would also be cheaper, so he wouldn't be borrowing and wasting hundreds of his mom's hard earned money. There would still be people with problems directly resulting from pot use, and unproductive people, but all I am pointing out is that prohibition compounds this and creates a myriad of additional problems. Laziness from smoking herb can be overcome a LOT easier than oppressive laws.

 

I've never had the luxury of having a rich, or even financially stable, family. My family is so fucking broke, it's funny. Whenever I have money I always give a little to my mom to help her out. I had to move back in with her after I was kicked out of the ARMY, and haven't been able to hold down a steady job since then. But I feel guilty when I can't chip in a little bit. Your son should be ashamed of himself. You need to be getting money from him, not the other way around. You raised him, and this is how he repays you.

 

Well I'll add that to me it appears his problems are more from issues arising because of prohibition. Even if pot really is fucking him up, what I said still applies to millions of other people.

 

the fact is the laws arent changing for this kid so he needs to get off his ass and do something with his life and if that means giving up pot (sarcastic gasp) than so be it.

 

I agree, but I also passionately believe in ending the MJ prohibition. So I had to throw it out there.

It would be in this guys best interest to either quit smoking completely, or cut down to an eighth or a quarter a week. And get a fucking job! Restaurants NEVER drug test, and everyone working in restaurants has their drug of choice.

 

or go work at a headshop lol but i think he's around that shit enough. whered the mom go anyways

 

I was wondering where the mom went myself..

 

well someone has to say it

You quite possibly one of the worse mothers I have ever heard about!

Anyone in that situation would do the same, hell I probably would. This guy is just doing what he knows to do. Its worked in the past for him so why wouldnt it work again tomorrow.

If the mother expects anything more from her son she is going to have to stop this negative reward system she has going.

Its called tough love now teach your son some responsibility

 

Maybe she's just reading the advice we've been giving, or maybe she made a decision about what to do with her son.

 

She is definitely enabling her son. It doesn't make her a bad mother, she just made some bad decisions. She needs to put her foot down and try to motivate her son to do something with his life. Not to say that he needs to quit smoking, but he definitely needs to become self-sufficient if he does continue to smoke. Using his mother's money to buy weed is one of the most disrespectful things he can do.

 

I agree. And saying that she is possibly the worst mother ever is completely fucked up.

 

This is for the lady if she is still listening out there:

Your son is going through a "dead-beat" phase right now and it has nothing to do with marijuana. There are plenty of dead-beats out there that dont smoke marijuana or have any other bad habits that ask their parents or spouses for money to serve other purposes.

It's simple. many posters here have already explained it but allow me to re-emphasize. Tell your son to get a job or move out.

There are plenty of jobs out there that dont require a drug test and that one can do quite easily even if one is stoned. Fast food, delivery, landscaping, etc.
And they dont pay bad either.

Let him smoke pot for God's sake if it makes him happy. Atleast he's not an alcoholic.

I'm a heavy pot smoker but I've found out a secret. I get high at night........after I get all my shit done. After I know that theres no other tasks for me to complete I smoke a bowl and relax.

Mom would that bother you so much? If not why dont you run that by your son and see if that simple tactic would work for him. Then he might be able to go to school, finish up, get a carreer. He would be making loads of money, probably have his own place, and smoke all the pot in the world and you wouldnt have to buy it for him.

 

agreed, kinda. u should allow his smoking, but things have obviously gotten way out of hand and it may be time for a break on his part.

plus...how often does he go to u asking for 100 bucks or so? i mean if its often enough then he may have moved on to harder drugs, and thats beyond my area of expertise.

 

If he knows the dealer and has been dealing with him and smoked the shit he was going to sell... and it depends on the amount, but if he gets in over his head he could end getting beat up

 

i think some of you younger males have to realise that you cant possibly understand how a mother thinks. theyre biologically tuned to want to care for their children and protect them despite problems. thats how mothers are made! thats why she has come here looking for help. its in a mothers -instinct- to keep caring for their children. however we know in our society that sometimes instincts arent the best for integrated living in society.

 

15- 16... You're still showing uncommon wisdom for any age and yeah I did skim through that thread! *shakes head*

 

You obviously haven't met my mother. She's kicking me out when I'm 16, we don't get along at all.

But yeah, I don't agree with that statement at all, sorry Bill, maybe that's how they're meant to be made, but I know some mothers who couldn't give 2 shits about where there kid is or what he's doing, one of my mates was never cared for by his mum (real mum), he lives with his dad, sends his mum christmas and birthday presents but never recieves one, even visited her house and it turned out she had moved and he had no clue, she doesn't give a fuck, he doesn't even know how many half-brothers/step-brothers he has anymore. quite sad really, it is an extreme case but as for mothers or fathers (given that the father is even known) I know many people who have been neglected and not cared about from both their parents, luckily the guy mentioned still has his dad.

 

we arent talking about those mothers, are we? especially in todays fucked up society there are gonna people people who dont give shit about anything. however this mother clearly is a mother, and has the ability to feel compassion, and thus will want to care for her son throughout a lot.

when people live in lower living standards, or in a world where they themselves recieve no compassion, then their ability to show compassion to the things they would naturally do so to is going to be diminished. however you will probably notice there its rather polarised. mothers either care a lot for their kids or dont give a shit. thats because some mothers dont make a bond with their child. but if they did, the bond would be very strong, as seen in this example in this thread. it just so happens that MOST mothers form bonds, as theyre meant to, but in various societies nowadays, bonds are rare things in all relationships.

as well as this, are you an only child? what are your parents maritual status? economic status? social trends? views on your adolescent changes?