The taste of her kiss still lingers on my mouth. Her presence is still here. I can feel her everywhere. I feel her in every sentence that I speak, every sentence that I write. She holds on to me with a grip so tight that it is not visable to the naked eye. This forebiddon love lingers upon me. If not meant to be why do I feel so deeply? Why am I completely lost and found all at the same time, with just the sight of her? The butterflies nesting in my stomach are in an uproar. They feel it too, making sure to let me know. An oath i made to another is what is keeping me from embracing my secret pleasure. A vow made to a kind man that has never done anything to deserve this. I have his heart in my hand, and he is slowely taking it back piece by piece. The pieces are fitting together, but do not attach completely as they were. His heart is damaged by my selfish acts. His pain i feel deep with in myself. His pain fights back with sharpened nails that scratches at my soul with every thought I have about her. The women that I can't live without and the man that I love, fight inside me. They pull me back and forth. Tug of war keeps me up all hours of the night. My life is in complete chaos.
Sorry. This poem is amazing. It feels like you've looked inside my heart and found my greatest joy, but then you've looked inside my head and found my greatest fears. Your words are those I have used in pillow talk, in my head, in my dreams of dying. The madness of my sleepless nights there, on the screen. Thank you for putting them so wonderfully on paper in a way I never could. I want to buy you flowers!
Thank you all...this poem and your responces are a kind of therapy for me. I am lost in my own head right now stuck at an intersection. This poem represents what paths I can take, they are both beautiful and at the same time ugly if they don't exist together.
Wow...it is amazing and yet a little sad if one can relate to this poem. I except the flowers and in return send you some back. I fealt alone when writing this and just to hear that someone can relate gives me hope and will help me rest easier tonight....thank you
Thanks for the flowers, I've never been given any before ) It is sad, but when I see her smile all is forgotten and for the time that we are together I am blisfully happy. It's a rollercoaster of a ride. I've kind of accepted that until it levels out I'll put up with the lows because the highs are so, so good. I guess that only time will tell if I end up floating on a cloud or falling to the ground. My only wish is that the nights were not so dark.
Your welcome for the flowers...I feel honored to be your first flower giver...lol The way that you write is beautiful....I can tell that you are a person that feels things very deeply . Peace and Love are sure to come your way.
Thank you, I hope so. I think that I feel things too deeply, sometimes that's a good thing - I can find beauty in the strangest of places - but at other times it is the cause of my nightmares. I wish that during my sleeping hours I could focus on the things that I had found beautiful during the day. When left to think doubt always uncovers my fears and buries my hope. Writing helps, something that is relatively new to me. It allows me to put my joy and saddness, my hopes and fears, there, on paper (or screen) for me to see. It organises them and makes them easier to understand rather than having them flying around in my head. I hope that the chaos in your head is starting to ease so that you can sleep easier. If only we could be stuck at the top of the ride! It should be so easy...
I can understand what it feels like to feel TO deeply. It can cause emotional bliss and emotional chaos all in the same day. Even in the same hour for me. Writing has always helped me. Unfortuntly I have writers block unless I am in the peak of some kinda of chaos, which is often, but I long to write happy thoughts. Thanks for all the feedback...we sound like we are both stuck on the same ride.
