Ah, this explains everything

I get it now!

 

Lmao thats great man!

 

LOL! Tell me that's not for real??!!

 

ROTFLAO


I just don't know where to start.... That's just so insane.

 

I'm tempted to download this chart and post it on my office door.

 

And that is why im not Wiccan LOL, Landover is hilarious.

I was a site of some crazed baptist minister who
had some of the same ways about him, but he
was preaching against christians using "jesus fish"
because it was an ancient pagan symbol for a vagina,
when placed vertically. Sounded like a good idea,
so i bought one and put it on my car, vertically.

 

Heron, that was par for the course.

The graphic is from Landover Baptist Church. Don't bother applying, there's a two year waiting list.

Their sermons are hysterical.

 

That is wonderful - it explains everything - you de man!

 

hahaha, n'sync... lmao!

I love me my Landover Baptists

 

I had a little free time on my hands, so I checked the Web site.

That's got to be a satire. It can't be a real church.

 

From Wikipedia - go and give them money at once

The Landover Baptist Church is a web site that serves as the home of a fictional Baptist church based in the fictional town of Freehold, Iowa. The Landover Baptist site and its associated Landoverbaptist.NET forum is a parody of fundamentalist Christianity and the religious right in the United States of America.

The site proclaims, for example, that the King James Bible as written is the literal word of God. It also has beliefs unique to its church only; for example, that holding different religious beliefs from those endorsed by Landover Baptist is grounds for being damned to Hell; that boys should be "de-sissified" and be assigned to extreme gender roles (the website even says that men who wear colored underwear are either European or homosexual, the same thing on that site); and that George W. Bush was appointed directly by God to the office of President of the United States of America to do battle with heathens and other un-American individuals.

The Landover site was created by Chris Harper (head writer and Chief Editor, aka "Pastor Deacon Fred"). Mr. Harper has used his "Pastor Deacon Fred" personna when giving public speeches for such organizations as American Atheistsand Houston Atheist Society

 

RE: The site proclaims, for example, that the King James Bible as written is the literal word of God. It also has beliefs unique to its church only; for example, that holding different religious beliefs from those endorsed by Landover Baptist is grounds for being damned to Hell; that boys should be "de-sissified" and be assigned to extreme gender roles (the website even says that men who wear colored underwear are either European or homosexual, the same thing on that site); and that George W. Bush was appointed directly by God to the office of President of the United States of America to do battle with heathens and other un-American individuals.

Ever been to Memphis? It's not that much of a parody. There are MANY folks in this country who believe that verbatim.

 

Ever been to Alabama? 70% of people here believe the language of the King James version is the language of Jesus and his time, thus the only correct bible is the King James version, which IMO is probably the most poorly translated version. Thats where the whole sect of Jehovah's witnesses came from... a translation of the tetragammaton to Jehovah sparked off that whole new religion.

 

Ever been to Florida? They pray at the feet of the almighty mouse and are rewarded with tourist $$$.

No really.

 

Not quite as bad in Arkansas - we got more real rednecks - I am sure that they think that I am going to hell. However, they have that country tradition of never messing in other folks affairs. You see a lot of religious unrest in the cities around here but not so much were I live. I pay my taxes, go to the local meetings, kick in every year for the fire department and do not cross their fence line. They do the same for me.

 

THere is a member here who has a good sig pic, its of like an invasion of goofys leaded by mickey mouse, its pretty cool and is the truth.

Alabama people are very nosey and want to know everything about everyone.

 

BWAHAHAHAHA!


(and it is satire, duh.)

 

If you guys like the Landover Baptist site you should read the letters they get. He posts all the nasty ones he get's monthly. Some are really funny.

 

Are they the "G-d hates fags" wackos?

 

I had no idea NSYNC was acid rock!