Should love and sex be seperate arguments?

I am heading out west to visit an ex (and still best friend) I do indeed plan to get thoroughly fucked whilst I'm away. The issue is the man I am with back home. I insist we are free people without labels and he is beating himself up over my planned sexcapade. He lays the guilt like frosting on a cake, says he doesn't want to sleep with others, he is all for me and all that ethereal connectedness stuf (which I am a total sucker for) and why do I need more? Fucking hell! I just want to be me! Not a "girlfriend" When did guys want monogamy? Where was I during that meeting? I don't feel guilty for wanting to let loose, it doesn't change that I love him, but I still love my ex too.

Can't you just love and have sex with whoever and however many? Aren't there people out there with room for more than one in their hearts AND beds?

 

Have been in an open relationship for a lot of years. Sex and love have nothing to do with each other. Have fun and if the fellow does not like it find a man who does. Sex is the friendliest thing I know to do (Grin)

 

...

 

amen .. whhheeew AMEN

(lets just keep things clean and everythings alll good)

 

Arent you the girl who caught HPV off of your partner
oh my god, dont you think you should tell your ex before you shag his brains out

 

I second that, and should you fail to tell him I hope he has a surprise for you as well

 

PS. I didnt catch anything! Best news ever! I would definatly tell my partner (who ever or how many) if I did have something. I play as safe as I know how, accidents happen. I never thought the word 'negative' was so so lovely!

 

hey, congratulations on the news

 

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Monogamy sucks. It puts far too much pressure on the relationship by imposing unrealistic expectations of absolute sexual and emotional fidelity that simply defies human nature. That, in turn, inevitably breeds jealousy and possessiveness, which destroy more relationships than any other cause.

If your current boyfriend cannot handle you being polyamorous, then you're much better off without him and finding a boyfriend who does accept it -- better yet, is polyamorous himself.

-- Skeeter

 

My point - but ever so much better said

 

if you're going to be polyamorous it should be talked about fairly early on in the relationships before things get serious. I'm a monogamy type person, but I know a bunch of people who are polyamorous. Most have one primary partner and are free to do someone else with their regular partners permission.

Even if you're a polyamorous person, you should be able to at least respect the stance of someone monogamous. Fucking someone else without their blessing/permission is cruel to them, unbelieveable cruel. If they can't handle poly-anything, then at least have the courtesy to break up with them before you go around fucking other people

 

Yes.

 

I agree that sleeping with someone else would be very very cruel....but only IF I was in a relationship with this guy. We were just seeing things go and having a good time. It was when I told him I was visiting my ex, he pretends like we were about to walk down the isle! I had no intention to hurt him that way, it was his concealed perception, all the while he's agreeing with my opinions and lifestyle choices (we have no labels, we don't belong to eachother, polyamorous was mentioned SEVERAL times and in understanding) I guess he thought I was bullshitting or hoping I would change my mind or whatever. It kills to have someone look at you through their moral standing. I can't be held responsible for my behaviour when I was lied to about his feelings can I?