probably not even a real poem, but just to get it out my system and maybe someone understands. never was things fall apart and just like that i knew i never existed there were no problems when i was impersonating but now that i recognize it it all falls apart and who i used to pretend to be is irrelevant are you as disappointed in me as i am in myself do you wish i had it figured out or do you want to see me fail this is new to me as i struggle to become me i fail miserably i wish i wasn't me again the history of she and father begot daughter who was nurtured by mother and daughter was prayed upon and grew to obey in the traditional ways and she tried to form herself into that common mold trying to be but continually losing herself how can you grow if you don't know your history if you never let yourself be free but you continue your life never fulfilled you never really could hide it though eventually you break you don't know who you are where you come from your history you let no one in it's called an illusion or just being fake and everything changed you never could be saved from it never worthy enough always thinking your skin was thick but they got to you--pierced you and worse yet--always saw through you and here she presents herself raw and unrefined
I really liked "Never Was" although, "The History of She" is pretty good too. I can relate a lot better to Never Was and if this isn't poetry I don't know what is. Is it just me or does it seem that it was broken into two parts. It might just be me because the "first" part... [things fall apart and just like that i knew i never existed there were no problems when i was impersonating but now that i recognize it it all falls apart and who i used to pretend to be is irrelevant] ...really reminds me of my first acid trip and the "second" part reminds me of the conversation I had with my mom after I got busted for possesion. I don't know if this is kind of what you wrote this piece about or if it has any similarity to what I may have misinterpretated it to be, but it is really a great piece of POETRY and enjoyed reading every bit of it.
