hey....see i'm a 22 year old with two kids from failled relationships. i seem to have a bad time in the dating game.....and although i have two kids i have never really been settled. i love my free spirited life and wish to live like this forever, but with my kids i'll have to be settled for a while. so my thing is that i dont ever seem to date other hippies, none ever seem to take that kind of interest in me. i'm not bad looking, but my guy friends all look at me like a little sister or one of the guys. i'm starting to think maybe i will never find a hippie to chill out with like that. and although i like that knowing my friends think like that means i'm not really pressured that way. i hurts when all you've ever done is casuall dating and have two kids out of it. when all you want to do is find that someone that you can connect with, that can hold you, even if there is no sex envolved, just to tell you everything is gonna be alright. where's that someone where's that best friend when you need them, when even your closest friends don't seem to notice that you've been crying yourself to sleep, cause the guy you always counted on stepped on you. where do you go?
i think i know how you feel girl. i don't have kids though and that might make it all different. where do you go?---i dunno...i'm trying to figure that one out myself. maybe don't go any where. maybe don't pay any attention to it. at least don't blame yourself. *big hug*
Whoh sister! You have friends and 2 kids and yourself. Honey your not alone at all. I know it's hard for you to understand now but your wanting love for the sake of love. Love finds you. I am 43, raised 2 sons, now 22 and 18 and have been single for 11 years! I love it! I have hip friends and date casually from time to time but am happy with my life and my 2 blk lab/shep mix dogs, who are my best friends. Take it from my years of experience...Most all the time that you go searching for love, you force relationships because you want it too bad. You see things in the guy that aren't there because you want him to be the ONE. This almost always causes sorrow. I'm not saying it's better to be alone (for me it is in this stage of my life) Just that "needing" a companion is the wrong way to find one. you need to learn to enjoy yourself and spend time with your kids cuz you never get another chance to watch them grow. You need to learn that you don't NEED a companion but if you meet some one and you feel a connection then slowly explore a friendship first. Now if you want to meet guys then open your eyes! They are everywhere! The gas station, the store, the park. Don't be afraid to go up to someone and say hi and some small conversation. It will happen when it is time. But please take your time cuz breaking up sucks. Good luck sister!
She's right. Don't be with someone just for the sake of being with someone. That can only lead to problems. Use this time to figure out what you're into. Enjoy your kids and your friends. Figure out what your interests are. Have you ever been hit on or pursued by a guy who is desperate and needy and has no life of his own? It makes my skin crawl. People who have their own thing going on are much more attractive. So, focus on what makes you happy and let love happen when it will. You'll be alright.
see, I'm only 17 but I think that I'm right-The people who are hard to understand, who are complicated don't find easy the man they can really love.
Stonimama, Don't depend on a man to make you happy, that seems to be our worst mistake. Try and find happiness within, love yoursef and your kids. And you know what ? The day you stop looking is the day when he will find you. good luck sweetie!!! Love and peace
