Is it bad?

Discussion in 'Free Love' started by itsme6526, Sep 30, 2005.

  1. itsme6526

    itsme6526 Member

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    Is it bad to be married and want to find some on the side?
     
  2. DancerAnnie

    DancerAnnie Resident Beach Bum

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    If you want to date other people, then you shouldn't be married.

    Of course, if your partner is OK with it...then more power to you.

    I know if I was married, I wouldn't appreciate it much.
     
  3. lawngirl

    lawngirl Member

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    it's only bad if your partner does not know about it, and/or doesn't want you to be with someone else. how would you feel if your partner was cheating on you? when most people get married, part of the agreement is that you don't act on your urge to "get some on the side." so i guess in most cases it is bad. but not always, depending on what you and your spouse have agreeed on.
     
  4. hippychickmommy

    hippychickmommy Sugar and Spice

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    Why get married if you want someone else on the side? Makes no sense really.
     
  5. ZePpeLinA

    ZePpeLinA Jump around!

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    why did you married in the first place? maybe you should re consider your priorities in life
    particularly if you have kids with your wife.

    would you mind if your missus "found some on the side"?
     
  6. SofiaS

    SofiaS Member

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    yes- bad, bad, BAD, then you should not be married!!!
     
  7. toolmaggot

    toolmaggot Nuts Go Here.

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    Not at all, dude.

    I'd get sick of hitting the same shit year after year after year.
     
  8. wizarddrew77

    wizarddrew77 The Wiz

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    No... as long as you have no problem with your spouse doing the same thing.
     
  9. dangermoose

    dangermoose Is a daddy

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    its not bad to want it, no, its bad to act on it.
     
  10. Baby Fire-fly

    Baby Fire-fly Member

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  11. adameistervousier

    adameistervousier Member

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    ask him if he wants to do a three sum and respect his wishes. if not you gotta problem.[​IMG]
     
  12. curious25

    curious25 Member

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    It is all bad, if you are married don't even consider it, don't fantasize about someone on the side, don't fantasize about former lovers.

    Just fantasize about your spouse... Anyway you want...
     
  13. Trickster

    Trickster Misfit

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    I assume you are in love with your partner? If you are, why aren't you satisfied enough that you have to search for something elsewhere? You're obviuosly not getting something you need. I suggest, before you do anything that will end things in tears, you talk to your partner. If you are simply not the type to commit to one person, i might ask why you got married or at least, why you did not mention this to your partner. I guess there is always the possibility, that they too would like to have "a bit on the side" an open marriage as it is termed. If you agree on boundaries and talk constantly, this can work and does all over the world. The main thing is though, TALK TO YOUR PARTNER BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING. It would be a BIG mistake if you acted first. And remember, if you choose to sleep with someone else, you choose to put you, your partner and your relationship at risk of you getting someone else pregnant. The pill and condoms aren't 100%
     
  14. harry yang

    harry yang Member

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    A happy family is more important than some on the side.
     
  15. Dressed to kill

    Dressed to kill Member

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    Try some anal sex. You might like it.
     
  16. Trickster

    Trickster Misfit

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    So, when there are troubles in a relationship, have anal sex and things will work out? Is that silly, deluded or just plain juvenille. Adult answers only please.
     
  17. gesone

    gesone Member

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    I got married a year ago and I can't help feeling attracted to other women. I haven't acted upon my urges but trust me when I tell you I get urges all the time. I love my wife but I worry that I'm eventually going to get tired of having sex with the same person. I don't know if I can handle that. Why did I get married then? Because I love her and I wanted to take our three year relationship to another level. Did I think things through, especially the sex thing? Yes, I did, but one thing is thinking about what is to come and another thing is actually putting it to practice. Now that I'm in this I try to not think about wanting other women but nature is strong and I can't help it. Some would say that what I'm going through is bad but for the record I haven't cheated on my wife with no other woman. I find nothing wrong with wanting to sleep with other people because as long as I take no action then no harm has been done.
     
  18. cbrmale

    cbrmale Member

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    It's natural to be attracted to other women while married. We really aren't programmed to be monogamous. It doesn't mean you love your wife any less, nor does it even mean your sex life is not good.

    Many societies around the world in the past (and quite a few in the present) accept non-monogamous relationships whether either or both partners can have some sexual relationships outside their core partnership.

    It is really up to each couple to determine how they want to deal with this situation. In my country, Australia, about half of married men and about a third of married women have had sex outside their relationship. It is a surprisingly common desire, and it is also quite a common thing for married couples to act out.
     
  19. springfling

    springfling Member

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    If you're a male, chances are good that you're going to be attracted to women. It's totally natural. Maybe.

    But if you need to think about whether you should ruin a good marriage by following through with sex on the side, maybe you need to find other ways to enhance your marriage. Sex isn't everything. But it is definitely bad to go looking for it outside of your marriage.
     
  20. Anastazija

    Anastazija Member

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    Your family is the most important thing
     

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