scared to life(moments of desperation)

Sometimes the pain is too real to feel, and inside my head lies infinite thoughts screaming...no one hearing....
My mind suffocated, confined.....
A fucking lunatic with a pocket full of razorblades....my own prison.....
I dont say a word ...i cant.....
no, it will all come out all wrong...
I deserve to be alone....and pain is too much....
too much pain inside...
A shattered soul.....i cut once more....i burn this corpse untill i feel "alive"..
It is the only way to release the pain....
IM scared to life once more by death...............


i would say im not crazy but only a crazy person believes they are sane

 

woah...powerful words...you are so great....*silent awe*

 

thats impressive piece of writing, but a very sad terrible thing to be doing

 

i try to write exactly how im feeling at the moment i never quite catch it completely but i do try with the most intensity....and you are nice

 

it is my affliction, and you are right it is/can be terrible.

 

i related to the first half of the poem, but i agree with keramptha... that's not a good thing to do to yourself.

 

yeah not so great of thing but this was the past ..although i still have thoughts of self destruction or reconstruction... i will not deffend myself for such acts....im not proud of some of the things ive done or im sure i will do
..

 

Sweetie, you never have to defend yourself. This may be sad, terrible, and uncomfortable, but it was/is part of you, and you are a lovely person

Like you said, it is your affliction. I'm so glad to see you dealing with it through your poetry, it's always worse when you have no way to express these feelings.

 

thank you so much ...you made me smile...................im still smiling...but seriously ..im glad that you noticed i used the word "affliction" and I am over ecstatic that you seemed to be the only one to think that I meant it literaly "my affliction" (as it reads in dictionary,or as any one whos experienced(ing) knows..umm..shit ..well im rambling...i tend to do that when ive lost track of what my point was...so Ill end it here..honestly thanks...