I want to have a baby...

thanx for the support, i trully apreciate it
hugs to all

here's whats going on
I spoke to my BF yesterday about having a baby (we have spoke about it before but he would always say he wasn't ready because of the money issue)
the conversation started out like all the other times, but then i talked about how i trust we can do it, told him everything i had posted and my positive points of view... still he was a bit uncertain and said he would have to get a better job and that he hasn't finish studying and that he would have to work his ass of and wouldn have enough time to spend together as a family and he just started to get a little frustrated.

then i told him about this parenting forum, and how all you ppl talk about your babies and how a lot of mamas here had their babies at a much younger age that me and are very happy and dont regret it at all. and he said ok but what jobs do they have, and that jobs pay better in other places. so i told him what all of you told me, about the money, saving, and all the other nice things you all said. and that some of you were in worst situations than us and pulled through.
his atitude started to change after sharing a few touching stories i read on this forum.
finally he said, LETS HAVE BABY!!!!
at first i thought he just said it so i would leave him alone (he was at work at the time)
but then he gave me a sincere smile and a nice hug and said that we could do it, that he doesn't need anyones aproval, that he doesn't care if we have to make afew changes and adjustments, this baby is going to be happy and healthy and is going to have everything he needs.
then he said, common lets start trying now!!! hahaha
but we talked seriously, today we are going to make a list of things that need to be done.
were gonna start saving up for the baby, start fixing a few things in the apartment, sell a few things we don't need or even donate them to ppl who need them more. clean up our system (no more weed or alcohol... (wine is ok though) i would like us to have a good detox before concieving...

so now he's even more excited than i was. keeps talking about how cute he will be, and started thinking of us playing together, what name we should choose, walking hand in hand, saying his first words and all those beautifull things.

i am very happy now... i wish i could have friends here like you, you see things so positive and i don't know how to describe it but you are very nice people and i wish you the best! you were the first to actually tell me i could do it

sorry about the mushiness, hehehe
anyway... gotta go make some coffee... work work work!!!
thanx again

oh and by the way, as soon as the line shows up on the stick i'll let you know!

 

(((hugs)))

That's awesome!

 

Sounds like you have everything planned out. The only thing I have to say is please not even wine. I would rather see you smoke weed every day than to drink even a glass of wine while you're pregnant. And since you never know when you are going to get pregnant, it's best to stop before you conceive. I work in addictions and I see the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome all the time. It's a myth that a little alcohol is okay while you're pregnant. I would rather see a baby addicted to heroin than to alcohol. The results are much shorter term. Most of the problems that baby's born on heroin or cocaine have they will outgrow before they are 5 or 6 years old. The effects of fetal alcohol are lifelong. And the problem is that no one knows how much alcohol is too much for your baby. Some people drink gallons every day and have healthy babies. Others have had only one drink in the whole pregnancy and have babies with problems. So while you're cleaning up the act, please stop all alcohol. Weed won't hurt the baby at all, but it will get you in trouble with child protective services. A lot of hospitals drug test you automatically now without telling you. And they drug test the baby. Especially if you give birth as a single mom or on state aid. So please be careful.

Okay, now that the sermon part is over. I hope you have a happy healthy baby as soon as you're both ready for it.

Kathi ( who gave birth for the first time at 19.)

 

Kathi, you're so wise

I agree with Kathi's sermon. Ditch all the booze, take a toke a few times a week...and have a homebirth

 

I didn't think I'd ever be saying this to someone on the internet, but I'm honestly very excited for you. Best of luck to you two, and please keep us updated!

 

I agree with everyone you sound like you would make a great parent and it sounds like you have done all the research for this,

my word of advice is keep up everything thing your doing now with your finances and start saving and most importantly believe that you can do it because this is what you want and you can't go wrong because if you believe that you can do anything you want you've already done most of it.

good luck

 

Good luck!

 

Conrats!.. Start taking your prenatal vit! and a B complete since you don't eat meat!. I think you can do it. If you sit around and wait till your ready to have a baby.. Well your going to be waiting for ever. Things just fall into place

When I found out I was preg I had been traveling for 2 years She was conceived in April 21 right by a giant redwood. Found out we were preg a few weeks later in Livingston, MT We didn't have a penny to our name when we found out.Some how we ended up at my mom's house in FL and am sitting here 3 days past by due date and I don't have room to put all this baby stuff it's all been random gift's We plan to cut the cost down breastfeeding. not using store bought baby wipes I made my own cloth diapers. Am going to make my own baby food. And it's true you don't need all the new baby gadgets out in the stores now. I get criticized all the time for not wanting to do what every other parent does. Good luck!..

 

You'll do just fine Our monthly income, strange enough, is also $1200, and our mortgage payment is $350 and we have THREE kids, lol, so ALL of our "extra" money goes to utilities and FOOD. So yeah, it can totally be done! i won't lie, we don't have "everything" we'd like (our house is definately too small for all of us, our cars are falling apart, and our only luxury is a dial-up internet connection), and no savings at all, but with some creativity, and willingness to make mature decisions, we have managed a decent life. We chose to live this way though; my husband had the opportunity to make a very good income with a job that involved alot of traveling, but he turned it down to spend more time with his kids. I could get a job, but again, the way we've chosen to parent our children would be compromised. Like my husband often says, if our kids end up hating us, at least we'll know them well enough to understand why!

 

Those are awesome words. You need to be quoted in a parenting book