What do you think?

Ok, so i just want some opinions on this. So i'm in my school musical. So were blocking this one scene, and apparently, some girls had helped move some benches on stage, and they directors were telling the guys that in the 1800's, that would never happen. The men would do all the work. Then the female director adds in, "that's when men were chivilrous, unlike today." now, i beleive that i'm in no way sexsist, i'm not even close. I open doors for my girlfriend, and all that jazz. and i do it willingly. but her last statement bothered me. so i said "hey, you were the ones who wanted to be treated as equals." so i got a good laugh from everyone, girls included. Then i got a special talking to after rehearsal, about me being sexsist! so i'm just curious as to your opinions. Lol, is this my hidden sexsist side coming out? Or did my acting teacher just overreact?

 

nope, the teacher was overreacting.

 

I gotta warn ya, dude. This comment, dripping with SEXISM (which is how you spell it) is not going to endear your cause to most of the people who post on the WIF.

If you want to discuss womyn's issues, that's fine. You can express any opinion you want. But, but coming here to only diss womyn is going to backfire. We got some firely ladies and gents on this forum. Also, if you are going to be posting in the WIF, please read the stickies at the top of the page, as well as the Forum Guidlines for the entire site. Just looking out for you. I know these people.

Just a heads up, from the Mod.

Peace.

 

Wait wtf?

 

And yet you ignored what his teacher said.

he didn't come here to diss women, he came here to ask whether his comment was out of line. Apparently, everyone except the uptight teacher(the one who made a sexist comment) took it as a joke.

If any comment was out of line..it was the teacher's.

 

yeah, i'm not trying to diss women. If you read my thread, you would have seen that i do not beleive myself to be sexsist in the slightest. As Megara said, i was just curious as to whether my retort was really that far out of line or not.

 

I don't think it is out of line, I probably would have said the same, 'cept of course "Well, we want to be treated as equals". If anything was sexist it was the 'chivalrous' thing, that implies men should still be doing all that kind of thing... well I don't like it, if I get to a door first I'll open it and if the guy gets to the door first he'll open it, the rushing past me to open a door even irritates me more than anything! If there's any carrying to do we can all do it together, or if the guys are not paying attention I'll do it, I don't care. I doubt I would've been bothered by *any* of these comments though 'cause the teachers could just have been stating the way things *were*, unless it was really clear they meant "....and it should still be that way today" it's just a fact, it was that way in 1800. We're also 200 years further down the line by now I guess I'm just not easily insulted.

 

Agree Myranya, everythings gotten so politically correct nowadays, it drives me mad.

 

How does that make it a "Woman's Issue?" That is what this forum is about. Women's issues, not one dude getting insulted because something he didn't like happened to be said by a womyn. That isn't a "Womyn's Issue" it is a personal one.

 

He asked whether his comment was sexist. How is that NOT an issue for women?

What forum should he ask his question in, if not this one?

 

YES, then, his comment was sexist. It was in the vein of "what else do you all want? God you got everything you asked for."

Assuming that womyn have already "gotten everything they want" and that getting them what they need is a burden to men is sexist to the extreme.

 

alright, fair enough.


do you think the teacher's comment was sexist, out of curiosity?

 

Well, Chivalry is not the same as manners. I think she used the word wrong. Chivalry was actually sexist itself, as it not only put womyn on a
pedestal but also prevented them from doing just about anything other than breeding. So, in fact, she used the word incorrectly. Not what I would expect from a teacher, who should have known better.


From the Random House
chiv·al·ry (shivÆÃl r"), n., pl. -ries

1. the sum of the ideal qualifications of a knight, including courtesy, generosity, valor, and dexterity in arms.

2. the rules and customs of medieval knighthood.

3. the medieval system or institution of knighthood.

4. a group of knights.

 

Point being back then women did a WHOLE HOST of manual labor.

 

Honestly, I don't think his comment was sexist. He said it in a joking manner to retort what his director said. A joke, like any high schooler will most certainly pull at one time or anyother.

We've become so uptight as a society about stuff, how things are said, mannerisms, and such, we're losing any sort of tough skin. It's becoming sort of a "TEACHER! HE CALLED ME A POO_HEAD! " situation. You can't say anything, even in a joke, without SOMEONE being offended. Frankly, it's ridiculous.

I honestly agree that, yes, we got what we asked for. We're treated like equals. I don't think it's fair for women to expect that they be treated as if they can do everything a man can do, but still have doors opened for them, coats held out, chairs pushed in.

But anyway, I'm all hormonal right now. Don't take me seriously.

/rant

 

Freek, I love ya, you know that. But if you really think what you just wrote, you have a lot to learn about equal rights.

When I don't have to get my husband to take the car to the mechanic, so I don't get bullshitted, because I am a womyn, then we'll "got what we asked for" when my dd's don't have to walk the streets in fear of child molesters and rapists, then we will have "got what we asked for" when the womyn who apply for jobs at many places, including where my dh works, and are not steered into the dead end, low paying jobs, while the men, with the same amount of education get steered into jobs with room for advancement and MORE pay, then we will have "what we asked for." When a womyn doesn't have to be afraid to say "no" to sex or anything else, without fear of being beaten, then we will have got "what we asked for." When I don't have to play Police Womyn with a good number of the posts on the forum, because there is so much not even hidden hatred towards womyn, then we will have"got what we asked for." Until then, we have not.

Also, feminism is a PROCESS. I mean who, in their right mind would say, Well those blacks now have everything they asked for. What is their problem." And then post a story about how some black dude said something stupid to them and want us to GENEALIZE this exchange to all African American people. The fight against sexism is a process, the fight against racism is a process. There are people who think African Americans have all of "what they asked for" and the last thing these people want to be called it "racist."

Honey, because you didn't see things years ago, you don't know. Please read some books on feminism, because feminism is not just a thing where one day everybody settles down and says "OK, now everything is equal." It is and will continue to be a struggle.

Oh, one more thing. "Feminism" isn't one thing. There isn't just ONE version of "what we asked for." It is a living breathing organism, which changes with the times, like anything else.

 

Sugar, I love ya, you know that. But if you really think what you just wrote, you have a lot to learn about equal rights.

When I don't have to get my wife to do any number of jobs, cause "it's a girl thing, you wouldn't understand", then we'll "got what we asked for" when if a teacher or neighbour who molests my ds won't be assumed by the courts to have done him a favor, then we will have "got what we asked for" when the men who apply for jobs at many places, and are not told not to bother to apply cause they're not welcome to, when my son is expected to be content with low paying jobs cause it won't be a stigma to women to "marry down", while the women, with less education and seniority get steered into jobs with room for advancement and MORE pay or else they go get a lawyer, then we will have "what we asked for." When a man doesn't have to be afraid to say "no" to sex or anything else, without fear of being considered homosexual or cheating, and if he says "yes" not to worry about paternity fraud or false rape allegations, then we will have got "what we asked for." When I don't have to listen to misandric stuff all over the place, including malls which sell shirts exhorting girls to injure boys, read Police Womyn censor what they don't want to hear, then we will have"got what we asked for." Until then, we have not.

Maybe when we live in a world where men aren't automatically expected to go into drafts, while asking women to wear a ribbon in their hair to show support for the war wouldn't be slammed as "sexist". Maybe when men aren't expected to pay for everything. Maybe when men don't get out and push the car in the driving rain even though the woman has more endurance. Maybe when men aren't automatically expected to kill vermin, go mining, etc.

Maybe when we live in a world where a man can't lose his job and/or business over a chance remark that offends some passing woman greatly (even if he wasn't talking to her at the time), while a woman can make outright hideous hate speech, and a man isn't called a "whiner" if he calls her on it.

This forum is very level headed, but out there in the real world it ain't so. There aren't abusive husbands, child molesters, etc. on here. Nor are there shrieking harridans and false rape accusers.

I've gone out of my way to call it down the line, including pointing out there might very well be a time and a place to kill someone relentlessly hunting down and abusing women.

Truth is, men and women are crap to each other. I don't see any critique of women being womyn bashing any more than constant harping about how all men suck is a critique of all men.

 

Maybe when, if I'm helping out at my son's preschool, if a child of 4 hurts his or herself and needs to be consoled I won't have to steer him or her to a female worker for fear of "inappropriate touching".

 

Maggie, I've seen sexism. I lived in a po-dunk, southern town for 19 years. I grew up with girls that were conditioned to believe that their place was in the home raising children and getting beer for some drunk jack-ass that doesn't seem to see her worth as a human. I've seen outright crude sexual behavior seen as appropriate in public. I've seen quite a bit. Abuse, rape, incest, low wages, harassment, bad cops, unfair judicial systems, everything.

But I also see where IG comes from. Good men are denied custody of their children purely because the mother wants them, even if she's not a fit parent. Men forced to pay child support on children that aren't theirs, because the mother can put off paternity testing. And when the child is proved not to be his, he's not reimbursed the 4-5 years of money he's paid out. Men are conditioned everyday to try to be more gentle and to embrace their softer sides, but it's not right for them to hug or pat the back of a child. Men accused of rape purely because the woman was pissed off at him for something.

As far as I'm concerned, until equal rights hits every little po-dunk town in America, we've still got a long way to go. Until women can leave their abusive husbands and not worry about him getting his police buddies to track her down for him, we've got tons of work to do. But at the same time that we're working to make things good for women, we need to know where to draw the line between what's going to make things equal for women and what's going to really bring down the standard of living for men as well.

Women are viscious. Men are cruel. It's a hard, cold world outside of this forum. That's the place that needs strict policing and better guidelines. This kid's comment wasn't dripping with hostility or sexism, unless you choose to see it that way. And so far, not many women on this forum HAVE seen it that way. He was a kid cracking a joke. And he was concerned enough to ask us if he was out of line. So, we should be letting him know that he's on the right track, if he's not there 100% already.

And then we should go out and fight our war against sexism on the real battle field: The streets of D.C.

 

RE: And when the child is proved not to be his, he's not reimbursed the 4-5 years of money he's paid out.

Actually it's worse than that. Not only is he not reimbursed, he's still expected to pay for another 13 years.