okay, i have a question about this guy i have been friends with for 6 years. when we were first friends it was because he liked me but i never let it be more than friends. we have always hung out (his parents have a 2nd house where i live, but his 'home base' is 2 hours away). he travels alot. last summer i saw him on my birthday at a bar and we slept together. we talked for a bit after that and stayed friends. he was in colorado over the winter and now he is staying at his parents place here 2 to 3 days a week. 2 weeks ago we slept together again, and it was much more intimate than the first time and we have talked since and i he seems to want to be more than friends. i called him this week and was expecting to leave a message and he answered so i was thrown off, he was very chatty and detailed about his life and i kinda blew him off without meaning too. see the thing is i sense he wants to take this further and i need advice on how to turn this from a fuck buddy thing to an intimate relationship. i don't know how. for example, when i was talking to him earlier this week he was saying he wanted to see me but his parents (who are in there 70's by the way) were going to be down (which means i am not trying to stay at his house) and he was trying to find a way to see me and when i got off the phone i realized i never even suggested him coming to my house (i live by myself!)! and i felt so rude, totally without meaning too. see he used to come to my apartment years ago, but since i have lived at this place he have never been here, so it was like it didn't even cross my mind to have him here. so basically i need advice on how to act and behave and what to do to make this move forward. thanks in advance for any help you can give
tell him! theres no secret forumla or anything like that. he likes you, you like him, tell him you want more and you'll probably get more. it's all about open communication
Girl, "This is something that I want all the time now, with just you, I miss you when you're not around" Me, "Get back on the damn street hoe, and makes me some money - your sugar ain't sweet enough to go in my coffee everydamnday - please, now get outta hea before charise comes on by - you know its her turn girl...shiieeiitt" okay, so maybe my part of the skit is a bit exagerated, but if you go off of what I had the girl say and he truly digs you - then you should be all set. Good Luck - sounds like your on to something good.
sorry I have a sick twisted sense of humor sometimes - please don't take it as a discouragement, you'll be fine with him I'm sure Now go on out there and getem' girl before I's gots to put cho ass backs to work on the corner hear?
i am really, really curious about what other people think about this situation and what they would do, so does anyone else have any opinions or advice?? please. i want to have a lot of info to think about before i make my next move and decide what to do. thanks in advance for any help you can give!
apparenlty, the masses agree with me on this one. I remember seeing you post in the old forums and reading some great things from you. now go get em'.
i guess so! i think i will go get him! no sense in letting my nerves get the best of me! thanks again for the encouragement dhs and that's really cool you remember me from the old forums!
I'll let you in on a little secret. Us guys are idiots. Complete and utter morons. We can't read your minds. We don't see the hidden messages. We can't understand your subtle hints. What I want to hear from a woman is the straight forward truth. No hinting around, just spill it out! That's what I want. It's a lot easier for me to deal with than figuring out some cryptic puzzle. Tell him how you feel. Tell him what you're thinking, what you want out of all of this. Or if you don't feel comfortable telling him, then ask him how he feels about where the two of you are and what HE wants out of this. That's what I would want. Mono
I'd say that's especially true when you're not sure what you're doing, so you're sending mixed messages at best... If he is picking up on any hints, if he's a normal guy, he is feeling rejected that you didn't invite him to your house while overlooking any come-hither signals you think you're sending (or maybe I just tend to find unusually insecure guys as friends?). On the other hand, if you just sit down & explain the situation, you two can figure it out together instead of missing the chance because of missed signals. Next time you are together in a quiet place, say something like how much you are enjoying being with him... If he ever asked you out way back when, tell him you didn't know what you were passing up & ask if you might get another chance... Or tell him that you're not sure, but you're sort of getting a vibe like he might be interested in a relationship with you, & that you'd like to give it a shot if he is interested... Which leads right in to the "ok, so now I'm not sure how to move this from whatever it is we are now into an actual relationship"...
