Ten minutes ago, a girl stepped out of the hotel room I'm staying in and left in a taxi, throwing a last smiling glance at me standing there and watching her moving out of sight... ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡It is the girl that I have had a crush on for almost two years and tonight, everything seemd to have come to a satisfactory end and yet everything seemed to be just beginning... ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡It all started over a dinner at which I made acquaintance of this adorable and sexy baby that was destined to become an indelible episode in my life. Casting my eyes on her for the first time, I couldn't help noticing she was in a ... really great figure, wearing shoulder-length hair, and behaved in an exceptionally composed manner that did not seem to fit an adolence-blooming age of hers. ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡At first, nothing unusually came out of the acquaintance. The budding crush I harbored for her did not spin out of control and we got along as friends, friends only until one night after a get-together in a karaoke orgy with other friends, I escorted her back and in the comfort of a taxi that strengthened intimacy, the buried love I had for her grew out of control. After arriving home, I sent her a message that was to see the beginning of two years' suffering, struggling, tormenting, puzzling and yet some ecstasy: I like you. ¡¡¡¡No response. At first, everything I said thereafter seemed to fall on deaf ears. She did not reply to my messages and seemed reluctant to answer my phone calls. But anyway, to quote improperly the saying "No pains, no gains", some efforts did pay off and with the appropriate chemistry, we kissed for the first time in a cafe that we had frequented as mere friends. ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡However, things did not turn out as I had expected and except the transit happy moments that I had enjoyed in that cafe, no positive signs ever came from her at all. She seemed to be repelling me after that night and resumed the old practice of falling silent to my short messages and phone calls until I lost patience and ceased contacting her... ¡¡¡¡ Time flied and two years later a phone call from her rekindled all the good feelings I had for her and we started dating again. The difference was this time she seemed more accessible and less detached... ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ Numerous kisses on her red lips, on her rosy cheeks, on her soft hair...My fingers touched her pure and warm body in what was the most exciting moment of my life, her bosom became the ultimate harbor where my heart's ship could cast an anchor, and her moaning touched the utmost of my mind's strings. ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ Unfortunately, as is understood to all adults, nothing in this world was perfect. Please do not construe the above "unfortunately" as implying there was any pity involved in some poor guy discovering that the girl he went to bed with was not a virgin. I'm not into that kind of obsession. ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡ And please allow me to skip the reason why I made the above "nothing-was-perfect" remark as I do not want to reveal too much personal information here. I'm writing tonight because I have just experienced a very happy moment of my life and could not resist the temptation to write down some words. Love is irrational, and love is ubiquitous. It's a pity that it is the first time that love befalls me for the past several years and I can't imagine a feeling that is any stronger.
Brand New Soul: Realy? If so, thank you for the kind words. English is a foreign language to me. I feel flattered.
However, as I said above, nothing is perfect. The problem is: I have a girlfriend, who is now living with me although there is no sex. The life with my current girlfriend is of no passion, just routine things every day. It was in a mood of "seeking a girlfriend because I'm old enough" that I started a relationship with her. How suffering it is now and what a dilemma I have thrown myself in! ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡I couldn't face it. On the one hand, there is this girl that I am passionately in love with, whose smile or even a short message to say "Good Morning" suffices to make me excited for a long time, and on the other, there is my girlfriend that I have spent a year with, who needs my caring. ¡¡¡¡ ¡¡¡¡Please, God, please tell me what I should do, or what I can do. Please. It's really tormenting
Well if its just a routine and your not in love with your girlfriend then its not really worth it. She needs your caring? Well you could tell her that you only want to care for her as a fiend. Now this girl you madly in love with!!!! Don't let her pass you by you might regret it for the rest of your life. Good luck.
