Getting someone to tell the truth to another?

Well, more shit with this girl I was dating, am dating maybe, not sure, just really confused. Anyway, we were engaged, then she broke it off and went back to her ex. Well, we just spent about 5 hours together, and it was great! We didn't have sex, just did the things we used to do, and talked a lot. We are still very much in love, I am sure of it. Anyway, her bf called like five time asking where she was, and she lied every time to him, and said she was at a friends house. I askd her what he would do if she told him the truth, and she said he would leave her for sure. I asked how she could be with someone who didn't trust her. When we together, I trusted her enough to let her hang out with him, and I know for a fact she was faithful in every way. I want more than anything for him to know the truth, because it is wrong for him not to. Now, how do I get her to tell him? I have asked her multiple times to tell him about her still wanting to be with me, and that if he truly cares he will listen and not get mad. It has gotten to the point where I am going to tell him myself, no matter what happens. She says she is sorry for causing so many problems, and hurting me, but now it seems that she is going to hurt him and herself if she isn't careful. How do I tell her this? What to do? I don't care if we don't get back together, I want her to be happy and truthful to every one. I also don't want to piss her off, because I value our friendship very much. We are best friends.

 

Maybe she doesn't want to leave him.


Don't tell her boy anything. If anything, your friend will get resentful of you for doing so.

 

She says that there are things she loves about each of us. But, she also says over and over that she isn't getting what she wants out of the relationship. I know she isn't happy, all of us (her friends) do. Women can be so confusing. I am a pretty intelligent person in my opinion, at least not a total idiot. But for the life of me, I am afraid that I will never understand what goes this girl's head.

 

Um, isn't the fact that she actually WAS lying to him proof that she ISN'T worthy of trust?

Sure, I'm sure you meant "doesn't trust her to not be fucking you," but really, if she feels it's okay to lie to someone -- particularly a loved one -- just because it makes it convenient to do other things she wants to, that's a bad sign, a sign of an unethical person.

Your best bet is to move on and forget this girl. Leave her lying and her inability to be straight with anyone for him to deal with. You already have, in my opinion, enough reason to not want this to be the girl for you. I've dealt with those girls who keep everyone around them waiting on tenterhooks for a commitment, and it's just stupid. Get out now.

Blue skies,
-Jeffrey