Help from the homebirthing mamas out there

this is exactily why i'm going to school to be a midwife.
when i had leane, i had her at a hospital. granted, it was the best ones around, birth-wise, but i was still stuck in bed for hours with the damn fetal monitor machine wraped around my stomach. most of the "pushing" part, i had a nurse and a resident doc standing in front of each of my legs while they had their backs turned to me and were talking to eachother. I just let them know when I had a contraction, they counted with me, and then turned around again. that sucked.
then they kept leane in an incubator for a half hour before i was able to hold her. i stressed that i wanted to hold her, but i wasn't able to. there was nothing wrong with her at all, no one even looked at her after she was weighed and had her apgar tests taken. Thankfully, my dh was there beside her, but that is one of the biggest things that made me mad.
My next pregnancy, i'm definately doing the midwife thing. We actually have a hospital which soley specailzes in midwives and natural births.

 

i am still ng..i told brighid this as well, that what if something is wrong with me while im pregnant?..what if they find something wrong with me and its harmful to the baby?..i dunno im paranoid

 

that's when they get you to a hospital pronto. If you're high risk, it's generally not advisable not to do the home birth thing. It's ultimately up to you, but if everything looks fine, there's really not much to worry about.
There's more intrusive, unnessecary medical treatment in hospitals leading to more complications in births than there is with home births. Women are generally more relaxed and more tuned into the experience with a midwife, as they are there to support you. You're in charge of your expereince instead of having some doctors and nurses running around deciding what's best for you.
Birth is a natural thing, not a medical procedure, as I'm sure you've heard a zillion times.
If you do have to go to the hospital, then you have to go to the hospital. Then that's what is supposed to happen. That's for the best then.
But majority of the time, everything goes as planned and all is well in homebirths. The midwife will know what to look out for, so don't worry.

 

Whether a mother chooses a midwife or a hospital to have their baby doesn't really matter. It's up to them. But prenatal care is paramount in determining whether a midwife is a safe and viable option.

 

But my thing is i do not like hospitalsi am very uncomfortable in them and i refuse to have my children in them...still, my worst fear is not being ble to do homebirthing and having to go to the hospital..either that or learning that somehting majorly is wrong with me..i dunno, i guess maybe i am just paranoid

 

There are also many midwives who deliver in hospitals or the few birthing centers that are left (what happened to all the birthing centers, anyway?)

I didn't have a "nightmare" hospital experience. No one tied me down, in fact, the nurses encouraged me to walk around in my two labors. The monitor was only used for a few minutes and hour, until I was pushing, (couldn't have walked around then, if I had wanted to) and I didn't feel like anyone was mean to me or anything. (With the exception of one nurse, who kept yelling 1-2-3 ect, while I was pushing) And that labor was almost 20 years ago.

IF you have a hospital birth a GOOD birth plan, OKed by your midwife or doctor and signed by them by 34 weeks of pregnancy, (my doctor wanted FIVE copies, for every place in the hospital Sage and I might be, and it was ALL honored) Don't walk into a hospital, in labor with a 10 page birth plan in hand. Two pages should do it. And even if you are planning a home birth, it is better to have a Hospital Plan you never use, than to have things done, that you don't know about, IF an emergency happens.

Birth plans shouldn't be too demanding in language. MIne was full of "we request, if possible, the baby not be given any artificial nipples of any type, for any reason. We request, if I am unconscious, that my breasts be pumped and the milk given to the baby with a feeding cup, not a bottle. We request, that a Board Certified Anesthesthialogist insert and attend my anesthesia (we knew I was having a section the 3rd and 4th time) not a Resident. We request the baby not be given any tests, medications or vaccines without Maggie's written consent, or Bear's, if Maggie is unable." EVERYTHING in our Birth plan was honored.

Anyway, a plan is good, even for a home birth. There are always things going on, and you will not be in any position to advocate for yourself WHILE you are in labor.

 

lol...i dunno why but i was reminded by this...the other day i was talking to my husband and he asked me what if we have a baby and u have to leave it with me and i dont know how often to feed it or what if its sleping and quits breathing....oh hes gonna be fun to deal with =D
Anywhoo...i remember when my sister had my nephew in the local hospital...she was so full of drugs she wasnt even coharent..i want to be fully alert when my baby is being born...my sister has issues..she said she didnt even know what was going on...i seriously dont want that

 

The whole thing is, if you're educated on the issues surrounding your labor and delivery, you're more likely to get what you want. And if you realise the importance of a birth plan and a birthing advocate (a doula, preferably) then you're even less likely to have interventions you don't need.

And if you have to have your child in a hospital, at least you know that you did everything to have the birth YOU wanted. And everything was done for the safety and security of both you and your baby.

 

sweetdreadlover, a good hospital will not drug a womyn out of her mind. I've had four very hard deliveries. Two of them, I labored in, and I was, although in terrible pain, never drugged out of my mind. Also after the births, all C Sections. They will give you demerol or morphine or vicodin, but a good doc should make sure to control pain without messing the womyn up, so she can care for her baby.

I had trouble even getting enough morphine for the pain the second time, until the Charge Nurse came in and fixed the PCA machine. Before that, no one knew how to work it and, if anything, I was UNDER controled for pain.

Your sister must have been pretty pursusive to get that much drugs. OR, she was such a pain in the ass, they knocked her out for thier own releif. This does happen sometimes.

 

my hospital birth experience with DD1 was every bit the nightmare I feared it would be. Part of what made it so bad was my own fear and anxiety. My away-from-home homebirth VBAC was every bit the wonderful empowering experience I hoped it would be. And most of the reason it went so well was because I felt so much more comfortable there, I felt supported, my wishes were respected. I didn't have to fight to have the birth I wanted. Nobody should have to fight for the birth they want, but in the hospital, if you don't want all those interventions, and you don't have a supportive care-provider, you will have a big fight on your hands when you should be peacefully laboring. Only you can decide what is best for you. Hospitals are for sick people and people who need surgery. I would never have agreed to go to the hospital to give birth to my second daughter unless I were absolutely convinced either she or I would die if I didn't go.

 

Looking at high risk births. I met Ina May Gaskin years ago (before I had Sage) and she reviewed my history and told me she would probably send me to the high risk OB at the hosptial if I had showed up at the Farm for a birth. Now, that gives you confidence that your high risk pregnancy REALLY was.

 

has anybody ever heard of unassisted pregnancy and would anyone ever do any such thing?..and if so what exactly does it entail?

 

I could never do such a thing. First of all, women throughout history have used a strong support system of mainly other women to get them through their pregnancies. Women just seem to do better when more experienced hands are around to make sure things are progressing well and that there are no problems.

Second of all, especially in a first pregnancy, you don't have a strong base of knowledge and experience to guide you through. You only have intuition and even that sometimes needs something more.

 

I'm planning a UBAC (unassisted birth after cesarean) with my next child. Birth is a very sensual, personal experience. Birthing alone really appeals to me. It's not for everyone, though. You have to be very confident in your body and your intuition. Studying midwifery helps too.

 

yahno ive thought about unassisted homebirth...but arent there laws against it in some stats?..i am just trying to cover all of my bases before i make a decision

 

There are NO laws in ANY states against unassisted birth. If there were, they'd have to prosecute moms who had "oops, didn't make it to the hospital!" births. It's a very common myth, but completely untrue. Some states do have laws against direct-entry (lay) midwives, but only a few.

http://www.mana.org/statechart.html

Here's a chart of the status of direct-entry midwifery, state by state.

ETA: If anyone's interested, I can post some links to freebirth (unassisted birth) websites.

 

awesome to know oregon is the most leniant state on there...lol...i would love to see some freebirth websites..hook me up pleez

 

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/
http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Estates/9015/unassisted.html

http://www.homebirth.org.uk/ofp.htm
Not a freebirth site, but still very useful - all about optimum fetal positioning.

http://mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=306
The Mothering Unassisted Birth forum. A great place for support and information.

 

When I was in hospital after my c-section after the birth and I was back in the room and bub with me it was my choice as to what pain killers I wanted. Tempting though it was I said no to the morphine as I didn't like it being off my head as I was as soon as she was delivered. I took panadeine forte and that was it and had them get that bloody thing out of my back which was freaking me out way to much and making it difficult for me to hold and learn to feed my baby as naturally as I could at the time considering she couldn't go anywhere near my tum. I think that I definitely found it disconcerting to be off my tits when she was born and having had previous experience of similar drugs I decided that I would give it a go and see how bad the pain was without them...it was however left for long enough to help me make that decision and there was definitely times I wondered what the hell I was thinking (particularly on days when I was reminicing my slightly naughtier self!!! ) but I do think they gave me the control which was best for everyone all round!

 

and in reply to the original post...

my pregnancy was a high risk one and is in no way indicative of what has happened to most people I know.
In fact my mum has helped her friend have all four kids at home. They live in the country about ten minutes from the local hospital and two hours from the lady who was the midwife. The oldest child is now about 21 and the youngest 7 and they are amongst the luckiest kids I know having been born and bought up in such a brilliant family environemnt. With their last child the bub came too fast and had the cord round her neck before the midwife had time to arrive but they all remained calm and managed to do everything they were meant to, whilst the second oldest cooked a happy birthday cake in the kitchen. Seriously, if I ever was to have babies again I would wish that I could do it in such a way as it seems to be so more normal than what I went through and I do believe that there are many many people out there who are prepared and experienced and happy to be with you and help you and your family!
good luck and go for it is all I can think!