Hugging and Kissing?

Alright, this is just a thought question that was stuck in my mind today as I was watching the TV. You see , we have these Indian channels that my parents watch because they wish to pretend that they are on the other side of the planet, well usually... anyway, there was a scene about two guys hugging or whatever and no it was not a gay scene, but I started laughing for some reason because i thought it looked gay - ( I am sorry if my personal prejudices hurt anyone, I have nothing against it except--I don't think its proper and its my opinion) , anyway my sister laughed with me but my mom was curious to know why... we told her about it in our own ignorance and got the response in Hindi " Honestly , how stupid and immature kids are today , is there no other relationship you people can think of other than that?" "Honestly, we never think like that at all back 'Home'"

First of all, I don't know how India is or how India was, except for a few years when I was a kid, anyway, this is not about India , this is about whether the modern society today here in good old USA is too obsessed with the idea that hugging and lets go to one more step- 'kissing' on the cheek is some how sexual in nature and not anything else? Any points on this... is that the only relationship one should think of when he sees two people of the same sex doing this... can't they be doing this out of brotherly or sisterly (if females) love/admiration (minus anything sexual in nature)?

 

I know what you mean. The first time i was in Europe I was pretty surprised to see fathers & sons kissing each other - on the lips - to say hello or goodbye. Or to see two men kissing each other as a greeting... it seems like only in America we're hung-up on physical contact = sex. My dad would never kiss my brother. They hug, but it's just one of those quick 'macho' hugs & arm-punches, nothing really intimate about it.

 

Yea, we're fucked up.

 

i think it must have a lot to do with the individual too surly? i mean, for some people they just dont need to connect any more than that or just dont feel the need to. personally i agree with you but not every one is that way...

 

Comparatively few American men kiss other men. You might find some men hugging each other, and it's not unusual to find jocks slapping each other on the backside.

In other countries, it's quite different. Honestly, I think other countries are a lot more advanced than we are in this regard.

 

i dont know. I kind of like a nice strong, firm handshake. It's dignified

 

The French custom of greeting used to be Hugging, then doing that kiss sound you see in BAD movies. Even males. Let me ask you. Do you hug your Dad? I bet you even gave him a kiss when you were young.
My point is: It's about affection. NOT sex.
I had a friend die in my arms once. I kissed his forehead to say goodbye.

 

My best friend grew up in Ireland, and her dad still expects a kiss on the lips and a hug from his daughters. He grew up with something like 9 siblings in his household, but my friend is constantly telling him that it's not appropriate and then her dad gets offended - and tells her how many years he spent changing her diapers. He loves her, that's all. And I know she'd prefer that he ask for hugs and kisses instead of nothing at all. I think there is a huge stigma that males can't kiss anyone on the lips, not even their daughters in the Western World. I have seen my best friend kiss both her parents, and have never thought anything of it, until my friend told me how embaressing she thought it was.

 

i find it quite sad that this affection of love and affection has gained the connotation of homosexual sex. i love my friends and family, why should i not display it upon greeting or others.

i do have friends though who frown upon it, so i do not hug them upon greeting because i do not wish to make them feel uncomfortable, but i have many friends who are comfortable with hugging, kissing etc.

but it doesn't bother me if somebody judges us, life is personal man, live yours
hugs and kisses x

 

All cultures are different. Most European countries have a custom to kiss eachother on the cheek. Two men will do it, two women will do it, but RARELY will a man and a woman do it unless they are related or really good friends.

Americans like their personal space. I don't know why, but they do. (Maybe someone could tell me why?) So, to us, that sort of stuff is "homosexual" or just very strange. To them, it's very common...a part of their lifestyle. It's all about how society programs us.

I prefer to hug people...even strangers...upon greeting. But that's how I, personally, greet people. Most people don't like it and they think it's very strange. But if I go over to Europe and do it...it's very normal. It's all about perception and culture.

Maybe that's why people from other countries think we're stuck up.

 

don't worry, not all believe you are stuck up, i do not. as you said, its all about different cultures. it is european culture to act as so, but in many places in the UK, this behaviour may not be so acceptble, as the UK is also quite an Americanized place.

i am in America for most of the summer, working on a camp site and then travelling around, and i may hold back greeting people with a hug and/or a kiss, may just try a handshake, or just stick to the norm and freak them out

 

why is a handshake less 'affectionate' than a hug? Then is a hug not less affectionate than a kiss? a kiss not less than a french kiss? you get the drift...

I dont think a random euro hug means anymore than a good old fashioned american handshake.

 

i do not know, i think it may just be a cultural thing but i feel a lot closer to somebody if i hug them or kiss them, it feels like there is a connection, if i just shake somebodies hand, it feels like its a businessman or lady.

again, each to their own but i love hugs and kisses

 

culture probably.

i hug women(that i know) and shake guys hands. I dont feel any closer to the women than guys because of that

 

yeah i have no problems with that. its totally personal, if you feel that is how you want to go about expression you remotion thats awesome. life is personal what ever makes you feel right.

i do enjoy the fact that i can walk up to a stranger in europe and hug them, in most countries. i don't judge people who shake peoples hand and it sometimes bothers me when people look down on people who may greet others with a hug or kiss.
embrace your culture

 

How i was raised (US) is that when i meet someone i dont know give them a warm hug,and family hugs and kisses.I give me dad a hug and kiss everytime i see him or when im leaving,some of my friends arent like that with most of there parents but they dont find it weird if you love someone express it and if you dont know someone still love them and give em a big hug its nothing homosexual i just think people who think it is are uncomfortable with them selves or are homophobic.Hugs are warmer then handshakes,luv n lite and hugs to all. Randy

 

I never really understood the guys that go around hugging women as a greeting or send-off but would never get near the torso of a man. It always seemed to me that those guys are just trying to get close because you happen to be female. A hand shake is good enough for another man, why not a woman too? Or am I missing something?

Of course I was raised by evangelical baptists, and touching anyone was a BIG no-no. lol

 

I really hate guys that shake my hand all limp-like. At least if you're going to shake my hand, put a little umph behind it!

 

Ewww...the limp, sweaty handshake...the kind that makes Hank Hill question his love for George W. Bush (any King of the Hill fans out there? Hope so, or my joke will be lost ).

 

I dont know honestly. Never really questioned it. I hug my mom and shake my father's hand. I am *not* trying to get close to my mom.

Until i know a girl pretty well it'd be handshake or nothing. Handshake first time and then just a verbal greeting usually. At somepoint that turns to hugs. Even then, its not an everytime thing. Sometimes it feels right to hug a girl you havent seen for a bit or when she leaves. Ya know? Its not like its a run up and hug every girl who walks through the door at a party

Hugs for guys just seem to feel natural a lot less often and usually only happen when you wont see someone for a long time. But yeah, guys get their handshaken more by me than women.

Thats just me.