I knew something was bothering my boyfriend recently So I asked him to come round this morning. Then he said it: I'm not sure what I want but,there is this girl in my class and we've become very good friends and she has feelings for me,but I'm not sure what to do,we don't know if it's friendship or love. Those words were so hurting,I've been crying all day,I haven't eaten anything. He still has feelings for me ,but I just feel so depressed right now. Sorry to bother you all,but I had to tell my story
I'm sorry to hear that. He doesn't sound too devoted to you. Let's switch roles: let's say that you told your boyfriend that you met some guy that you have feelings for. How would he react? I wouldn't waste my time with someone who doesn't care that much about me, especially when he says he has feelings for another girl. That is, if I am in a serious relationship. If it was just sex, then I probably wouldn't care. What's your relationship like? Did you think it was serious before he broke the news about the other chick? If so, it doesn't seem like he is a very good boyfriend, sorry to say. That's really shitty of him and I hope you can get through this. It might take some soul searching, but in the end, I hope you decide that you deserve better. And maybe, once this "fling" bores him, he'll come crawling back to you so you can say, "Um, I still have some feelings for you, but there's this other guy and he treats me with respect..." peace and love
Shinta, It sounds like a terrible situation, and it hurts like no other because it's the equivalent of unfaithful. Yet he had the guts to tell you the truth, even though he knows he could lose you. I disagree about the maybe him crawling back to you part. Don't count on it, and wasting your time thinking or hoping of such things is only going to turn you into someone you probably don't want to be. I wouldn't black mark him and call him shitty either. He's confused and just as you deserve a right to find happiness in life, so does he. It's terribly painful but if it isn't with you, then it just isn't with you. Maybe in the future you'll be able to be happy for him. Just try to take care of yourself now, trust in whatever love you shared and honestly, not to get overly cheesy, but somehow love (in one form or another) will pull through even if it's not the kind you and him used to have.
at least he told you up front and didn't run behind your back with someone else. be happy about that.
i think while it sucks that this girl seems to compare to you, it was very honest of him to let you know. it is better to find out that way then discover you guys were being kept secrets from eachother. good luck with everything
Hello Shinta, I am very sorry to hear this.. Love is a strange emotion.. The fact your boyfriend has been honest with you he deserves credit in that sense.. I know when the truth comes out it hurts to start with but it will get easier.. Your depressed feelings hopefully will stamp out over a couple of days.. Now you know the truth maybe accepting what has happenned could be easier and to try to move on.. Dont ever feel bad about spilling your feelings its better to tell than to keep and suffer alone.. We are all here to help Regards The_Warden
Is this the first time you have ever heard of this girl, or were you aware that they were friends? If you were aware that your boyfriend was devoloping a friendship with this girl, then it's a good thing he is expressing his feelings honestly with you. Although he may not be sure what his feelings are, there is something to work with there between the two of you. It still may not work out, but at least he is being honest with you. You would be more hurt to hear this news through the grapevine. If this is the first time you have heard about this girl then I would really be questioning this guy's devotion and commitment to the relationship. If he is keeping you in the dark regarding other relationships he is persuing (be it friendships or more), and people who he is friends with, then there is definitely something wrong.
I'm sorry to hear how you feel. But, you have to let him know where you stand. Yes, he did own up when you asked, but that to me is not enough. If he was truly into you, nobody else would matter. I'd ditch him if I were you, maybe then he'd realise what a mistake he's made, but he doesn't sound that worth it to be honest.
