In an ancient European country there once existed a kingdom known as Tridonia. A neighboring kingdom in the mountains to the north, Vlosloc was its name, was the yearly target of well planned military campaigns. The Trids knew that the Slocs hoarded vast caverns of gold and treasure in their lofty climes, so every spring, upon the equinox, the Trids gathered their mounted troops and rode up the mountain paths to conquer, loot, and spoil. However, the Slocs would always beat them back. They had a secret weapon. That weapon was a disinfranchised gargoyle with nothing better to do. The Slocs catered to his every whim, so each spring he took the high ground and put the Trids in their place. Now, the gargoyle had only one eye; he also had only one arm and one leg. When the mounted troops charged up, shouting and waving their swords, the gargoyle would simply hop up on his hand and spin around, kicking all of them back down the mountain side. This happened every year, and after the gargoyle had kicked all of them back into the valley below, he would sit back on his one leg and just laugh: "Ha-ha! Ha-ha!" Then, one spring, came a traveling Rabbi. The military mind was quick to seize the opportunity, for they thought that if a holy man led their yearly charge, surely his God would give them the victory. So gathered they again their mounted troops, and up they rode with the Rabbi leading the way. At the top waited the gargoyle, his one bulging eye purveying all. The troops charged, shouting and waving their swords, and up on his hand went the gargoyle; spinning, spinning, kicking every soldier and horse from the mountain. Then he sat back and laughed: "Ha-ha! Ha-ha!" In the settling dust of battle stood one confused Rabbi. He stood before the devilish beast and asked: "Gargoyle, why did you not vanquish me as well?" The gargoyle laughed again before he answered: "Silly Rabbi, kicks are for Trids."
