Ask Stereotypical Christian Anything

Discussion in 'Christianity' started by Portalguy, Apr 16, 2006.

  1. InfluentialHarmony

    InfluentialHarmony Member

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    do you resent Jews??
     
  2. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Influential Harmony, if God wanted people who gave a pain in the butt he woulda kept Satan around.
     
  3. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Busmama, it's called a trinity. Don't confuse it with the threeways you like to have.
     
  4. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Libertine,Mocha colored? Get outta the Starbucks and into the church you communist loving no gooder.
     
  5. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Varuna, turn Christian. If God wanted you to care about politics he would've made you smarter.
     
  6. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Not as much as I resent teenage girls who dress like they just walked off the set of a hip hop video. Here's a little advice...Clothes are your friend.
     
  7. Professor Jumbo

    Professor Jumbo Mr. Smarty Pants

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    Dear Mr. Christian.

    I consider myself to be a Christian, but I consider only the Gospels (both new testament and Gnositc) to be the word of God. The rest of the New testament Paul &c. is as much the word of God as the nutritional information on a twinkie wraper. Am I'm going to hell or will I be okay?
     
  8. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Hi, I'm Professor Jumbo and I like to make up my own rules! You know where I'm going? Hell.
     
  9. rg paddler

    rg paddler Senior Member

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    Well I got the rubber suit - I'm wearing it now - but for some reason they wouldn't let me into church.I'll try the other end of town they might not mind in there..
     
  10. rayne_lyric

    rayne_lyric Member

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    I never really renamed myself (although I have and am considering it) so thus no shame on my mama. And I don't think she'd care anyways.
     
  11. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Paddler, go to an Episcopalian Church. They'll let anybody in there.
     
  12. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Rayne, talking to you reminds me of the resurrection. I nail you with an insult and you don't comeback for three days.
     
  13. Sera Michele

    Sera Michele Senior Member

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    OH! BURN! lol [​IMG]

    Someone here's got a little wit about them!
     
  14. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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  15. InfluentialHarmony

    InfluentialHarmony Member

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    do you ever get lonely?
     
  16. Varuna

    Varuna Senior Member

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    Dear Mr. Stereotypical Christian:

    What makes YOU laugh?

    If God is Omniscient, Omnipotent, Omnipresent and Omnibenevolent (and Omnitranscendant) then doesn't he also love a good Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, Sikh, Zoroastrian, Rastafarian, Jain, Shaman, Wiccan or any other non-Christian?

    Jai Vishnu

    Peace and Love
     
  17. Zoomie

    Zoomie My mom is dead, ok?

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    Dear Incorrect Katrina Survivor,

    Prithee, what exactly makes you a "Stereotypical Christian"? Do you have an extra stick up your ass or are you thinking about Mary Magdalene again?

    No, seriously...
     
  18. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    No, I don't get lonely. There's always people in the clinics saying loud things and gesturing at me.
     
  19. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Varuna, how nice of you to make a post where you can say the word Omni a whole bunch. What makes me laugh is when people use big words to tell me other people beside
    Christians are going to heaven. LOL That's a good one.
     
  20. Portalguy

    Portalguy Member

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    Zoomie...Read the first post. Take your meds. It'll be okay. One day you'll find a girlfriend. Or boyfriend. Or slower sheep.
     

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