aight so I finally get the house to myself today, and I was about to rip a bowl when someone parks in my driveway so I stash my shit and see who it was. By the name of the thread you've already guessed who it was. Well I was outside barefeet and very cold shivering for 20 mins while they talked me bout it all.. They seem to really take a liking to me, And asked me a bunch of questions.. like Who was higher in evolution.. and my dog was right there so they said Dogs or humans... and I said humans.. then they try to go oh but they have great hearing and sense of smell, well hmm see what the dogs have accomplish through there evolution and we've been to the moon ect. And then they were bout to leave and they asked me if I wanted them to come back.. and that just put me on the spot out of no where.. 2 random strangers askin to come back to my house and talk about god... even thoa I told them I don't beleive in god, so I said no and closed the door. The good news of today thoa is.. I got a new pipe for free from my buddy. and I got weed for 420
thats good i'd like to mess with them a bit though bring em in and start doin wierd stuff mumble alot stand really close to them while they talk burst into a yelling fit or maybe even a seizure display multiple personalities, one of which happens to be extremely violent
ugh, i hate evangelists.....they always try to force their religion on you, it's really annoying. they've got those heavy southern baptists that come by your house all the time here, so when they do come, I like to tell them I'm gay and look at them all lustfully....the same people never come back....
all you have to do is just go "no, i don't want to listen to your religion, stop trying to push your beliefs on me and go away." I saw a good sign on someone's door once that said "I don't try to push my beliefs on you, so don't try to tell me what to believe." We used to play games with them too, like they'd knock and me and my buddy would scream "IT'S THE JEHOVAH'S, RUNNNNN" then we'd bust out of the garage and run to my house. I do feel kind of bad for the kids though, 'cause they have to tag along all the fucking time. That sect is intense, though... my dad always compared the committment to Jehovah's as the same kind of committment someone makes to a gang. lol, my grandma thinks that if a Jehovah LOOKS at you you're instantly converted... oh man, not to be a dick but it is funny to screw around with the Jehovahs - i'm just sick of this conversion/missionary crap
They used to come out to our place alot over the summers... But we fixed that. Just kept messin' with them over and over, they eventually stopped making the trip.
you should have invited them in for a bowl or answered the door with a joint... oh mAN! someone should make a pan of special brownies and invite the guys in and give them some get them fucked... and have a nice conversation with the dudes... lol me and my friends kind of fuck with em... one person talks to them while everyone else in the next room pretends that they're having a fight... cursing at the top of their lungs and shit
you want to know whats funny? about 45 minutes after i read this thread(i didnt respond cuz i had nothing to contribute) ...2 jehova's knocked on my door! i didnt answer it though. lol first one to get some of em stoned will be my hero
my friend was jehova through his mom... and I toked with him all the time.. thoa His mom told cops I was a apposable drug dealer.. fuckin bitch he hated her and now he has moved out to his dad who support what he does.
I'd answer the door with my 12 gauge and be like "Get the fuck off my property" I bet you'd never see a Jehova's witness run that fast. either that or invite em in and give em some tea thats spiked with acid. And just keep talkin to em til it kicks in.
Kind of on topic: I was in the mall with a friend of mine, and there was this Scientology booth set up. The guy just opened his arms to us, welcoming us to come over and listen to him talk about his faith. I grabbed my friend by her arm, and took off, yelling "Run!" as loud as I could. He looked nonplussed.
scientology took our chef away from southpark.. or so he says.. he didn't beleive with there beliefs..
^yeah, i mean, he happily did the show when they took the piss outta every other religion under the sun, muslim, catholic, you name it - but taking the piss out of SCIENTOLOGY, well, that's just disrespectful.
tom cruise said he was goin to eat katies holmes.. placenta and the babys embilico cord.. thoa after the birth he told the presses that he didn't know what they were till someone told him so he didn't.. wow that guy is fuckin nutcase..
Haha, around christmastime some evangelist dude came to my door and was very fervent about being heard out. He kept asking me if I believed in jesus, like he didn't believe me when I told him I did for the first time. He asked me if jesus lived at my house (I said yes, but that's a lie, jesus moved out with his brother jose and his compadre carlos a month ago) but I think he thought jesus took up more conspicuous residence in his humble abode than mine, because once more he seemed like he was prompting me for the same questions again and again. Last time I indulge some poor fundementalist soul's whimsy as part of Christmas goodwill. Anyway, when he finally backs far enough out of my doorway for me to close the door, I see in a mirror in the front room that I'm wearing a shirt with a Star of David on it.
I wanna trip on acid and talk to some jahovias... "So... like god is... in the sky with jesus... and he like.... OH MY GOD THE SKQUIRRELS ARE BACK SHHSKKSHKSSHKSK.........did you hear that?"
