OK, well i read through some of the forums here and i have a question about my friend. We have been friends since we were like 6 and recently he has been implying [sp] that im gay. I told him that i wasnt despite that he found some websites on my computer... and we talk alot....especially at night and in the hot-tub when he sleeps at my house... im not open about me being gay.. my parents are VERY religious.. i go to a christian school AND i was made fun of REALLy bad last year when people just thought that i was gay.... mostly from me hanging out with all girls.. ANYWAY my friend said something like.."oh well i know of 3 people who wear Abercrombie... you.. and 2 other kids that are both gay".. i get the feeling he was trying to imply something..i want to tell him but im afraid it will ruin our friendship and some of our common (sometimes sexual) jokes... so anyway could u give me ur opinion on this?...got any first hand experience. sometimes i think he is Deffinatly straight and other times i get some gay vibes... he told me himself that i send gay vibes.. so what do you guys think..im in NO rush to come out to everybody.. i have only told one person....also im 14 and in the 8th grade.. he is in 9th grade and his goin to turn 15 thank you
You guys get in the hot tub together? I didn't know boys of 14 had such good gaydar. Perhaps he is gay himself and that's why he's so sensitive to it. You're only 14 you don't have to tell anybody if you don't want to. You're not ready to come out so don't. If you think it'll ruin your friendship then don't tell him. You're still in highschool you don't need any major life changes right now because a lot of your friends WILL turn on you. But then again it seems like this friend of yours is pretty comfortable with homosexuality since he already knows a few people who are gay and is obviously good at picking up on it. But don't forget that he will look at you differently from that point on. Seems like he already knows & isn't the type to freak out and if you trust him I don't see anything wrong with telling him. As long as you trust him enough not to blab it around the whole school. But then again, it is highschool..... Best of luck to you, coming out is not an easy thing to do.
Let's see....he thinks you're gay and he spends the night at your place and gets in the hot tub with you. He knows of at least two other people who are gay. There are common (and sometimes sexual) jokes between you. I wouldn't be at all surprised if this boy were more than just "comfortable with" homosexuality.
thank you VERY much for your guys help... ill update u guys if i do tell him....anyone else got any opinions on it???
I'd hold off on telling anyone, you're only in 8th grade. You just wouldn't want to tell the wrong person. In middle school there were people I wanted to tell as well, but when I look back on it now, I'm so glad I didn't. People change, and who knows, you may not even be hanging out with next year. I would just hold off on telling anyone for a while.
not in the hot tub like..doing anything..just... sitting in the hot tub listining to music and talking... its not like a tiny hot tub either..and we dont go to the same schools... thank you very much.. i guess its up to me.... maybe next year.. maybe this year.. who knows..
It's your call man. I mean, he seems quite open about it, so I'd go for it. If he's a good friend and all, I think it'd be okay if you told him. He sounds like my friend Taylor, who I told, and was absolutely fine. In fact, we still make sexual jokes (and he even slaps my ass to kid around- yeah I know its weird, guys at my school are pretty open with homosexuality, althuogh no one is ACTUALYL gay at my school, which is frustrating, but that's a whole 'nother story!). So I think it'd be cool. If you WANT to, then do it. Do you want people to like you for who you are, or would you rather be liked by people for who you aren't? I know it's not always that simple, and I wouldn't suggest mentioning that you're gay as the first things you say to a new friend, but at the same time, you should be willing to let your friends know at some point in time, whether it is now, or sometime in the near future. Just go with how you feel. I guess 14 is a bit young to come out to everyone, but at the same time, if you know that you're gay, then what's the point of not coming out, aside from kids maybe not being mentally mature enough yet to understand/accept it? I thought I was bisexual when I was 14, and I came out RIGHT when I turned 15 as bisexual. Then as my freshman year of highschool progressed, I realized that I was definitely gay. So then, if people asked, I said I was gay. But I wasn't suddenly like: "OMG GUYS, I HAVE AN UPDATE: I'M GAY, NOT BISEXUAL!" People just kind of got to know. And now, my entire school knows, and everyone's cool with it. Whatever, I'm rambling, sorry. lol Cheers, and Good Luck, and Love, Dylan
"oh well i know of 3 people who wear Abercrombie... you.. and 2 other kids that are both gay" I totally didn't just use that to torment a male friend who wears Abercrombie. I'd say, if you really think you ought to tell him, next time he brings it up, tell him. Now, this is coming from a girl who's been trying to tell her best male friend for weeks that she's bi, but hasn't been able to. And, oh Gods, I just had the perfect oppertunity, but didn't. ... But then, he can't keep a secret. If your friend can, go ahead.
lol... ya there stuff can be expensive.. especially the Fitch stuff....but now im wearing some abercrombie..some billabong.. some quicksilver... and Element and oh.. i liker Timberland shoes.... anyway i think im goin to tell him..i really dont think he will tell anyone.., last friend i trusted w/a big secrit though.. he turned out to be a back stabber :/
