Not Supportive/ hate feeling attacked (merged)

I was with a friend of mine and it came up that I was vegetarian. She acted really shocked when I told her I don't even eat fish. She repeately asked "but why" "but why", "they're going to be eaten anyways" "chickens dont have brains", "what do you even eat"



errr, I didnt want to come across as defensive but I dont know how else to react when this happens, other than acting like it doesn't bother me

 

My friend is not being supportive of my decision of becoming vegetarian. She said that the PETA movies are fake, and edited, just to make people become vegetarians. I got very mad, I was like, " No, the videos are to EDUACATE people!" Do you know what made me REALLY mad, she said," PETA= People Eating Tastey Animals!" That set me off! I screamed, and got in trouble.



Bre

 

That is exactly what I'm going through! My friend is all what do you eat! I was like anything I want!

 

I just made a similar thread about this



Just don't comprimse yourself, at least you spoke up for yourself

 

I really didnt want to get into an argument over it with my friend, but now Im wishing I expressed how I really felt.

 

I can't believe she said that! She actually knows why i became vegetarian. It is for the animals! I know all meat eaters are defensive because many people in our rural community are meat eaters.

 

I feel that you should have experessed how you felt. I did, and I felt much better about that.

 

chickens dont have brains???? that is one of the most ignorant things i've ever heard. chickens are very complicated animals that form friendships and have emotions.....just like every other animal. get her the book "the pig who sang to the moon" ....there is an entire chapter devoted to chickens. anyway, the best way to be prepared for that kind of crap is to educate yourself so when they say something brainless like that (how ironic, and she thought the *chickens* were the ones without a brain!) you can come back at them with facts and information that will leave them speechless. because you cannot argue with that. and if someone does argue to the point of making you want to pull your hair out just remember that unfortunatley not everyone cares about important issues and that doesnt make the issue any less important or any less real but actually says something about them.

when people ask me why im veg i always repond with "ethical reasons" and figure if they want to know more they will ask. i always get the same reaction to my reasoning......it's always a casual "oh" and then on to the next thing. i dont think people even give my answcer any real thought. i could be wrong but it bothers me. i kind of wish people would ask to know more.

 

I guess I never became a vegetarian for ethical reason, I just stopped eating meat. However, now I continue to be veggie for ethical reason. I never really educated myself about it; seemed simple to me: I have a problem eating an animal that has been killed for me to eat.

Maybe I should start to educate myself...I dont mean to sound ignorant, I really eased into the veggie lifestlye in a really non chalant way.

 

i did too. it was easy for me because i love animals and i didnt want to see them killed or raised for food. it was simple to me too. animals are sentient beautiful and living creatures like ourselves so we should respect them and their lives.....seems simple enough, right? i think to the average veggie it is simple but to someone who doesnt think treating animals with respect is important or that animals are our equals it doesnt look so cut and dry to them. that's why being educated on the issue itself is important because then you can educate others which is important to the cause and to the animals.

 

hey, I hear ya... I have also found that for some reason, when people find out your vegitarian, they think you'll be amused with all the retarted anti-veg jokes.

i.e. vegatables arn't food.. they are what food eats.
... I cant enjoy a meal unless I know something died for my pleasure.

Its really morbid.. and when people do it, they think its like I'm gonna be amused, and laugh with them... funny part is, when family members do this... I'll usually try and attack (or make fun of) something they belive in (church or something) in a similar way.. and they just get so freaked out... and for some reason think its different...

 

(sigh) It's a tough one, isn't it?

I am VERY active with my church, and one of the things they love to do is have dinners together... once, twice, sometimes three times per week. This is awesome, and it's potluck, so everyone brings a dish to share. But between my very real allergies and my food choices, I find that I can't attend most of these events. There is one other vegetarian girl in the church, and that I know of EVERYONE else is omni.

I get a lot of the same questions. My mom doesn't comprehend this either, so I get it when we go to my parents' house too. I've found that it's easiest to just answer "This is a choice. It is MY choice, and I am healthier for it. If you would like to discuss it with me please feel free, but I do not feel up to a debate at the moment."

That works about 90% of the time for me ((((((hugs!!!))))))
love,
mom

 

Sorry to hear about your encounter Alex, we all know how old those comments get... but, unfortunately it happens a lot. How long have you been veggie?
If you're new to it, expect a lot of that... After a while you learn how to handle it, and people begin to either accept it, support you, and sometimes even start seeing your point of view. And other times, there will just be people who don't want to open up their minds, and like to get a rise out of you, and you just have to learn to ignore those people.

Most of my family and friends didn't understand it when I went vegan, nor did they want to understand it. But as time passed each of them grew more and more accepting.

My mom is quite interested now, because of the health benefits. She doesn't see the animal cause my way, however she understands WHY I see it that way.

My dad has cut back on meat tons, and doesn't like to hunt as much now. He claims it's because ever since I got my cat, that he has learned how truly emotionally aware animals really are, but I think it also has a lot to do with the fact that he sees how much it upsets me, and why. He will take me out to vegan restaurants, cook me vegan dinners when he has time on his hands, and makes me a vegan birthday cake now, annually This is the most surprising out of anyone I know, because my dad was the most UNaccepting of my vegan lifestyle in the beginning. Now, not only has he learned that there's no way anyone will change my mind, but he's also learned that most of my food is delicious ANYWAY

My boyfriend used to hate hate hate it that I was vegan. When we first started dating I was just a veggie, and he would poke fun at me about it, but it didn't bother him all that much...then when I went vegan he threw a fit. He mainly complained that I couldn't go out to as many restaurants with him and what not. [Which I still do, I just order a plain salad if that's all I can work with] But then, in the recent months he tried going veggie himself. Although that didn't work out for him he now has a new respect for my lifestyle, and tries to work with me in avoiding animal products. Like, if he wants to do pizza for dinner he will help me check into all the pizza places around and make sure that the one we choose has an option of vegan crusts and what not, so I can order one without cheese and enjoy it too.

My friend, Lindsay, she used to make fun of me too, but now she's just come to accept it. She doesn't really care either way anymore. And she makes sure that if we are in a group of people or at parties, that I have an option available to me besides meat, cheese, dairy, eggs, etc. We took a ride on her step dad's pontoon [sp?] boat one day, and he prepared all sorts of little snacks for us because we were going to be out there for a few hours... and Lindsay made sure to tell him that I was vegan. It was really nice of her considering she really DOESN'T understand my point of view at all.

My relatives have grown more accepting as well. I still have one, that likes to pick fights with me, but I've grown as well...to ignore her. My grandma tries to make sure that I can enjoy food with them at holiday gatherings. At easter she made me a mini, personal sized vegan pie which was delicious, and I was very grateful for everyone's help. My aunt had cooked me up a simple vegan dinner, and cut up some fresh veggies for appetizers when everyone else got theirs. Sometimes, I almost feel a little spoiled and inconvenient during the holidays BECAUSE my family is so generous and accommodating about it, but I really appreciate it.

And I can't even describe in words how drastic of a change that is, from the beginning, when everyone I knew didn't want to do anything except try to change me back to "a normal omnivore"

Hopefully as things progress the people around you will become just as accepting and/or supporting.

Good luck

And don't get too angry... the angrier you get about comments like those, the longer it will take for them to accept it and be nice about it as well. Just swallow it down, and take it in stride for the time being. But remember, we all know how hard that is to do sometimes

 

Thank you for the info!

 

Its just a choice like anything else.. Feel no shame if you feel you're eating the way you want to eat. Honestly for me it just kind of grossed me out to eat meat gradually until I couldn't anymore.. Yeah animals are still killed the way they're killed but you're not supporting it..
And I'm pretty sure PETA isn't the most innocent thing though anyway.

 

I guess I'm truly blessed. My dad gave me big ol' bear hug and "congratulations son" when I told him I was returning to a vegetarian diet.btw: My folks are vegetarian as are all the members of the church I attend.

 

95% of my fellow church members are vegetarian and a good number are vegan. I'm Seventh-day Adventist and vegetarianism(and pacifism) is part of church doctrine.

 

why exactly is that? (veggie-ism being a part of your doctrine) i've always wanted to know that.

 

my old friend is unsupportive too and tried to get me to come over and smoke a meat cigar....? My girlfriend and our friends i met through her are all vegetarian though.

 

People will act ignorant about whatever you believe in because ignorant people love conflict,,, They have the damn need to feel superior to you,,, Just tell your friend that at least youre sticking to your morals,,while hes chewing on somethings ass for a treat,,, I think that all us animal lovers out there appreciate you stickin to it