and if i never woke what would happen next

My insides keep pouring out
all over these electronic pages
I dont think I can even write anymore with pen
and paper
I keep looking to my head to find answers
but I can't even find my head most of the time
its probably in the clouds
like usual
i just need to bring it down
to where my feet trample my own heart
like its fun to be better than someone.
i say hello there,
who do you think you are?
I'll give you a piece of me
If only I had one left to lose
I'd put it on the table
I never was a poker player.
I lost myself
bit by bit
over time, over wine
I never had the heart to judge another human being
or animal for that matter
i refuse to use my anatomy
to take advantage of a life
that can not even argue with me
I guess it doesnt really make a difference
my two cents arent worth me opening my mouth
because when I do nothing comes out
except jumbled words
and thoughts I never thought
I would end up this way
but what can i say?
nothing
I am disconnected.

 

I won't say I know exactly what you're going through as no one ever does but I'm feeling very similar at the moment and this poem helped me see I'm not the only one so thank you.

 

It's not the answer that enlightens,
but the question!
Turn eyes inward,
around,
dream my loves.
Dream, O Dream
and rest-

 

Oh, come now, let's pull the thorn from the Lion's Paw, already! He's usually such a noble animal!

Best wishes!