This was originally posted in Random Thoughts by Bedlam.As it will soon be buried and since only people living in Australia will really relate to it and since making fun of Kiwi Speak is a national past time, I thought I would make this thread a sticky, unless anyone objects. How to speak New Zealand Milburn - capital of Victoria Peck - to fill a suitcase Pigs - for hanging out washing with Pump - to act as agent for prostitute Pug - large animal with a curly tail Nin tin dough - computer game Munner stroney - soup Min - male of the species Mess Kara - eye makeup McKennock - person who fixes cars Mere - Mayor Leather - foam produced from soap Lift - departed Kiri Pecker - famous Australian businessman Kittle crusps - potato chips Ken's - Cairns Jumbo - pet name for someone called Jim Jungle Bills - Christmas carol Inner me - enemy Guess - vapour Fush - marine creatures Fitter cheney - type of pasta Ever cardeau - avocado Fear hear - blonde Ear - mix of nitrogen and oxygen Ear roebucks - exercise at the gym Duffy cult - not easy Amejen - visualise Day old chuck - very young poultry Bug hut - popular recording Bun button - been bitten by insect Beard - a place to sleep Sucks Peck - Half a dozen beers Ear New Zulland - an extinct airline Beers - large savage animals found in U.S. forests Veerjun - mythical New Zealand maiden One Doze - well known computer program Brudge - structure spanning a stream Sex - one less than sivven Tin - one more than nine Iggs Ecktly - Precisely Earplane - large flying machine Beggage Chucken - place to leave your suitcase at the earport Sivven Sucks Sivven - large Boeing aircraft Sivven Four Sivven - larger Boeing aircraft Cuds - children Pits - domestic animals Cuttin - baby cat Munce - usually served on toast __________________ If you do not maintain a sense of insanity you will go mad. ¤´¨) ¸.·´¸.·*´¨) ¸.·*¨) (¸.·´ (¸.·`¤... Bedlam...¤ bedlam is online now Add to bedlam's Reputation Report Bad Post View User's Gallery Reply With Quote
I was actually thinking of starting a thread like this one.You managed to list many more than I could have.You missed the following: Dunnesty - US soap opera staring Alexis Kerrington. Sudney - State capital of NSW. Bid & Breakfast - Unlicensed accommodation hotel. Fush & chups - The original takaway food,originating from the Old Dart.
oooooooh, it's so on. http://www.critic.co.nz/showfeature.php?id=2621 Please pay close attention to reason no 7....
Yea ok .I might start another thread on this one. Point no 7. What about the largely unintelligable sowff Lundin (South London) acccent? Point no 6. Afghani is a unit of currency. Would you like to be called a dollar, pound or Euro? Point no 3.That is because so many Australians eat margarine.
hahah nice bedlam and bilby, we know its all in good jeest towards our friends across the Tazmin, hehe
This link has deeper discusion on the subject. http://www.quadrant.org.au/php/archive_details_list.php?article_id=638 A "ductionary" by Alex Buzo was published in 1994. I did not have the money for it at the time when it came out. Kiwese: a guide, a ductionary, a shearing of unsights, Mandarin, 1994
I am dissapointed. I thought I was going to cop a heap of abuse from our cousins across the Tasman. I will unstick the the thread.
CHEERS FOR BOONIE We are all Aussie blokes and sheilas, and we are all best mates. On this soil we grow our fruit and veg and run sheeps and cows as our fathers and our fathers' fathers also did so (note: and before that, the aborigines did it).We are Aussies and we love youse all from other countries, even Kiwis, even though we take the piss quite a lot. We love footy, barbies and getting shitfaced on Friday night, especially on Fridays when the footy's on the tele. We are known far and wide as 'Bronzed Aussies' because we win lots of bronze medals at the olympics. We are the best country ever in the history of the universe. Boonie is a legend. Amen.
Hey FrozenMoonBeam, Now nobody loves a bit of a joke more than Aussies do but for fuck's sake mate, we don't sing that verse of the anthem...I have never heard it sung and I hope we will never have to sing about some dumb pom who claimed Australia for the British Empire. NObody drinks that Fosters Blue Label shite for one reason...it's shit. Fosters have made better beers before, Carlton Draught and VB. Isn't it true that Maoris are the people in NZ who happen to outnumber whites in jails mainly as a result of racial discrimination like there has been in Australia? We dont have guys like the Mongrel Mob and those other guys punching on in the streets..although we have a moment the other year when some drunk fucks went beating lebanses guys. Oh and the other thing...Germaine Greer, I have sympathy to the feminit.
The website bagging Australia was not funny because every point was obvious to any intelligent person.
I remember when the Inside Rugby magazine came out a few years back there used to be a "Letter from over the Ditch" at the back of the magazine and believe me my whole family would pee ourselves laughing over the letters cos they were so funny (cos everything was spelt with a New Zealander accent)...
