Women tell me I'm not big enough to be pregnant....

I'm still in a size 10....sometimes an 11....that's the same size I wore before. And, only recently have I had to start buying some maternity pants....and that's because they're just more comfortable.
I've gained 13 pounds....well, actually only 11 being as I've lost 2 pounds this week (Is that bad? ). I'm not big, just have a baby belly. I've seen women bigger than me right now when they were only 3 months along.
So, while at a family gathering today, my mom was introducing me to the older ladies there (As I have no clue who any of my stepdads family is) and they all told me that I was WAY underweight and would have a lot of problems with my baby. They basically told me that I'm terrible for actually eating healthy and staying active (I walk about a mile to a mile and a half a day) instead of gaining 50 pounds like they all did back when they were young and spry.
My doctor told me at my last appointment that I'm healthy, and the baby seems to be doing perfectly.
I've always read that gaining a lot of weight is unhealthy on both me and baby....am I wrong? Or, just like all the other times, just letting what people say get to me too much?

 

Hon, you're doing just fine.

Social opinion of pregnancy and weight gain varies depending on the generation. Brian's mom was told by her OB not to gain more than 20 lbs and she basically DIETED to maintain a weight gain of less than 20 lbs.

Every pregnancy, every mother, every baby is different. You don't have to gain a ton of weight to have a healthy baby. As long as your belly is growing as it should and your baby is maintaining her normal activity level, and you're not feeling abnormally tired or sick, then you are FINE.

Don't let some old uninformed birdies make you paranoid. You KNOW you're doing right by your baby.

 

get this jesterguy off here. These topics are way to serious for someone like that. Grow up man!


Don't worry about that. Eating healthy is the best thing you can do. It's way better then eating fatty stuff to gain weight. Your baby needs Vitamins and Minerals, the Good stuff, not empty calories .

A girld from my School got pregnant, she just gained a little weight, as some people just to from time to time, and nobody knew she was pregnant, until she suddenly gave birth. Ok, she was a smoker, and the baby was a little on the smaller side, but healthy! (And still is, and the little guy is now 7 years old!)

 

you know, everyone is different. when rainbow is pregnant, she shows superfast, but her mom said she barely showed until she was like 6 or 7 months. as far as gaining wieght, relax. most of what i hear lately, people have dropped that " too much wieghtgain talk". eat healthy and drink lots of water. stay away from junk and stay active ( your labor will progress better). i coached my wife at our first birth and look forward to the next one (it's getting close!)

so, don't sweat the small stuff. if you feel good, you're doing great!

 

My maternity pants didn't fit until I was 7 months pregnant, don't worry! Some people carry the baby back more than forward (those ladies you see with the humungo bellies ) Times have changed since all those old women in your family have been pregnant. Doctors actually prefer you to stay active and eat healthy... even if you lose or not gain as long as baby is growing everything is fine. I always carry my kids like you are. I actually lost inches while pregnant... when I started being pregnant I was more in larges and mediums and while pregnant I went into smalls and mediums... it was strange but hey, we were healthy. It sucks but now that your a mommy you'll be critizied and bugged and nagged for the rest of your life. Just ignore 'em or take the good advice and shrug off the bad.

 

Well if you're not pregnant... then what ARE you?

Sounds like one of those silly things people say before thinking. Kind of like "Oh, you can't possibly be old enough to have a 10 year old!"

I guess we're both just having serious problems with hallucinations
love,
mom

 

I think I've come to the conclusion that when it comes to pregnancy, everyone has an opinion. Some people say "wow, you're huge" when they see me, and then others are worried I haven't gained enough weight (I've gained 15 pounds and have 6 weeks left before the due date).

So... buck up. As I said, everyone has an opinion, but everyone also has an asshole. If you feel good and healthy and the kid is moving around then all is good!

 

I am 23 weeks pregnant and I have only gained 9 pounds. Usually people don't know that I'm pregnant unless I tell them or I am wearing something very obvious. If I wear my regular clothes, no one knows. I have had 3 ultrasounds and each time the baby measures bigger than my due date, so I know the baby is growing just fine. I feel like my bump just keeps moving up instead of out and I am carrying her much different than I did my son. Like the others said, every pregnancy is different, and there is no perfect amount of weight to gain!

 

I agree with what the other mamas said. If you are healthy, and feel good and the baby is doing well, it isn't a matter of the weight. Every womyn is different. I gained 35 to 40 lbs with my first three and then only about 27 lbs (the least my doctor will "allow" you without sending you out for "a big carb rich meal....") with Sage.

Yeah, I get that with my 20 year old. OBVIOUSLY I am old enough, she's here, has been for 20 years..... I just kinda take it as a compliment, even if that wasn't what the person meant.

Moon, if you are feeling good, and growing along (occasionally you do lose a lb here and there while you are pregnant, especially when you start to get bigger and it effects your ability to move around as much) you two are OK. Some mamas gain most of their weight in the last 12 weeks or so.

 

Ha ha ha...this is so true. I get the same thing with people including my doctors. My one doctor said I wasn't gaining enough weight (this was at around 20 weeks) and then when I finally started gaining weight (it seemed to happen all at once) another nurse told me I was gaining too much weight!! Aargh!

 

You're doing great, don't let anyone bother you--obviously they don't know you well enough to be making judgements about your body and its health!

i gained 50 lbs with my first baby, 20 lbs with my second, and 10 lbs with my third. They weighed 8 lbs 14 oz, 9 lbs 6 oz, and 9 lbs 6 oz respectively. How much you weigh to start with, or how much you gain have little to nothing to do with the baby you will end up with unless you're extrememly over- or undernourished. And you would know it if you were.

You're doing awesome with the walking; i walked before i was pregnant with my last baby, and finally lost some of the weight from my others; i was only doing it to lose weight though, so while i was pregnant i lost that motivation, and haven't seen it (or my waist!) since. It takes alot of determination, and you should be really proud, because it's good for both of you!

 

lol, I've been guilty of this one a lot lately. I think it's because my own internal "old guage" is set according to my parents(as in, you aren't old until you're well older than them), who just keep getting older! Now, they are going on 60 and getting a first grandbaby from my sister. There's a couple of older women who I just can't get past it, it just seems amazing to me. One woman who I'm good friends with, through a big group of mutual friends. And we hung out for quite a while, I knew she had kids but didn't know how old, until we were both at a big family gathering for Thanksgiving and the group of people I was spending my time with kept getting refferred to as "the adults" while this other group was "the kids". It actually took me a while to realize that her kids are my age and older! She's only in her early-mid forties, and I guess now that I know I can see it. But still, I never would've guessed she had 25-yo kids!

My bf can't get over one of his coworkers for the same sort of reason. She's in her early sixties, and really does not look it. He was so blown away when he found out she has teenaged grandchildren he actually called me in the middle of his workday to say, dan she looks so good for her age! I told him to go tell her that, it would make her happy!

 

I don't really have anything new to add, cuz yeah, if baby is measuring properly, then you're fine.
I gained 50-55 pounds when I was pregnant, and Leane was 9 lbs 3 oz, but 2 friends of mine who recently had their babies, didn't gain as much and each were 8 lbs 7 oz. The onle girl didn't even show until she was about 7 months along. Up until then, it just looked like she had a flabby belly, it wasn't round or anything.
Yeah, people are always going to have something to say. My doctors were freaking on me for gaining so much, and honeslty, I really wouldn't recommend it. I ate pretty healthy (basically ate nothing but fruit and veggies, couldn't even look at chocolate and chips), except for slurpees (craved those like mad). I was walking a lot across town on like 4 hour walks, but one day, it came to the point where I was having to stop every 10 minutes, I couldn't see, was dizy, purple and swollen. My regular blood pressure had gone WAY up because of all the weight I'd gained, and when I was out walking like that, it would shoot through the roof! My doc told me to immideatly stop it. So I spent the last 2 months on the couch and gained double what I should have then.
The best route to go is to be active from the get-go, eat well, and all should be just fine.

 

Hon, I dont think your blood pressure went up due to the weight....It might have been more due to something else...If you were eating healthy, it might have just been what your "normal" during pregnancy is...

And the blood pressure had to be something different. I'm a large girl and my blood pressure is perfectly normal.

 

Thank you for your replies, ladies.
I've dropped a couple more pounds, but, Alexis is healthy, she kicked me so hard today it made my whole body jump.
I can't avoid junk food....well, mainly chocolate. Dark chocolate. I drink tons of water, though, and about a half a can of soda a day (I know it's bad for us, but I just can't resist).
But, I'm feeling great. My belly button is almost gone, and my belly is getting rounder and rounder....I think she's dropping a bit....doesn't seem as high up as she once was.

 

My homeroom asshole- I mean, teacher- in high school was still, like, a size 4 when she was 8 months pregnant, and everything turned out okay.

 

Moon flower, the nice thing about the belly getting lower is that you can breathe more easily. BUT you have to pee more......Post an other belly pic, if you want. I LOVE preggy bellies. I didn't get a belly cast with Sage (it was hard to find someone to come to the house in 99 to do it, and I couldn't travel) and I wish I had one.

 

Oh yea....I'm peeing like 4 times in a 45 minute period. She still travels up and gives me a good kick in the ribs every now and again.
I'll post more as soon as my mom gets home....my arms reach just can't get a picture of my whole belly anymore.

 

I dunno, my doc said to stop gaining so much weight because it was causing it to go up..... It was mainly when I was active that it REALLY went WAY up....

lol, gotta love them kicks!
At least dark chocolate is healthier than milk chocolate

 

your blood pressure can be high or low depending on a lot of factors. My BP is usually freaky low, but with the pregnancy, it is now up to a "normal" level for the first time in my life.