I dated a guy on and off for 3 years. He broke up with me about two weeks ago. He works at a restaurant (and lives about an hour away.) Often, I would hang at the bar and wait for him to get off from work. During that time, I enjoyed talking with one of his co-workers, with whom I have a lot in common. This co-worker and I speak via email about favorite musicians (like Devendra Banhart) and he likes to talk about religion (which is also a topic I am deeply involved with.) Is it tacky/wrong/too fast to be checking out this guy?
The only one who can really decide whether it is or not is you. If I was you, I'd wait for a few months at least, but like I said, it's up to you. You're the only one who knows whether this feels right or what is right here.
I truely understand what gypsy girl is saying and agree that it is up to you. But you came here for an answer and an answer I shall give you. He broke up with you. He broke up with YOU. You owe nothing to this person. You are not responsible for his happiness. I am not saying by any means that you should go around flaunting this new friendship and or relationship around him but you shouldn't hide it by any means. What it comes down to is that you should be happy. If this new guy makes you happy then I think you already know the answer to your question. Though you just came out of a very very long committed relationship, so be careful my dear. I know everything will work out for you.
^^^ Well said. Ryver's right. You are free to go after this new guy right now, if you wish. Like Ryver said, though, try not to actually rub it in his face. That would just sting like a bitch. Common courtesy is a good thing. Good luck!
I agree, you should talk to other people and get to know them, even if they are friends/co-workers of your ex. I wouldn't go jumping into anything right away, simply because you should give yourself time to heal from the relationship that just ended, but if you like talking to this guy and getting to know him better I see no harm in that. Now that is not to say your ex might not have a problem with it, because more than likely he will (depending on the circumstance of the break up). But that is his problem to deal with not your problem. Like someone already pointed out. Good Luck!
Yes. I like him. But to be honest, I don't think I should be pursuing someone so quickly. But I'm not pursuing because I "need" to have a boyfriend. I'm just plain horny
Yeah...my friends are so sweet; taking me out and talking about pursuing my deeper purpose, and focusing on developing myself as a woman, and I'm nodding and sippin on my coffee, checking out the guy that's walking by.
I really you should let both guys know first, and see their reaction... and you can act on it accordingly...
Ah well, I would rather not speak with the ex at this point for many reasons, but about the original post, it's really a moot point now. I think that we (me and the guy I was talking about) are better as friends. He has good taste in music, but I realize that there isn't too much else I find intriguing about him.
If you are just wanting sex, then don't fuck someone you could actually have a relationship with. That may sound crass and cold... but if all you are looking for is a person with a penis, then don't taint the possibility of things with someone whose mind and heart you like. Pick an idiot with a dick...and then you will have no problems moving on when the need is satisfied.
Yes, you're right. Two things: First, my ex can't stand this guy he works with. Secondly, after posting, I have to admit that I get a definite friend vibe from my ex's workbuddy. I really don't think he thinks of me as anything more than a buddy. In short, I had made a decision right after posting that I am not interested in this potential mess. If I am going to meet someone, I think it is nothing but problems to meet them where my ex-boyfriend works.
I like Devendra Banhart too.... I hope your ex's name isn't will cuz will is my friend Anywho Banhart is the man...get into some Sufjan Stevens, also. I'd start with Seven Swans and Michigan...my fav two albums. He's got Avalanche coming soon though!
haha. I'm not a cold-blooded harpy here. No, his name is not Will. Devendra fan? You might also like Josh Ritter. Josh Ritter is from Idaho, and he reminds me of Dylan and Nick Drake smooshed into one. No one is like Bob Dylan though. He is the king of rock n roll storytelling.
