I got the idea for this thread from "Question for the Men", a post about male preferences for the number of men a woman has slept with. I don't get it. Where do y'all draw the line between "good girl" and "slut"? And isn't it all just a state of mind? I personally have had ... let me count ... six or so different partners? And I will have more. But I am not a slut by any stretch -- I seek the kind of innocence that comes from the first experience with another person ... the way it feels to get to know someone new. (Label me a bad girl if you will ... but I know differently.) So what makes a bad girl bad? The number of men she sleeps with, or her attitude about it? Is it possible to be a bad girl who is also a virgin, and a good girl who has "got around"? (Answer to the last question -- in my opinion, yes!)
First off...no. you cannot be a "bad girl" if you're still a virgin. Because I think you're a virgin in more ways than one. Now with that said,I wouldn't consider a girl who's had LOTS of partners to be a bad girl. I think there's two way to be considered a bad girl. One would be to have that wild attitude where there seems to be no consequences to her actions & the bad girl of the sexual kinky nature. Again,doesn't mean she's been around the block a thousand times,it may just mean she's comfortable in her sexuality & open to experimentation. The kind of girl I would consider to be a bad girl is the kind who likes to party,usually the loudest one in her group,the one who gets the drunkest & kicked out of a bar. Maybe has some tattoos or a wild,spunky hairdo or piercings & may have that alternative lifestyle. And when you look at a girl like that,you immediately think "I bet she's wild in the sack." The kind of girl who won't let anybody tie her down. Those are the ones I'm attracted to unfortunately & the ones that will break your heart if they don't go psycho-crazy on you first. I personally don't have a problem with a girl who's had what would be considered a lot of partners. Mostly because I only date women older than me. I'm 27 & only date women 30 & older. (I didn't say I wouldn't fuck a chick younger than me,I just wouldn't date her). I certainly don't want a novice in bed or one that I have to teach how to fuck. I say that because I've had quite a few partners myself. But it's also a different story if your 22 years old & had 40 guys.
well, heres a 17 year old girls perspective on a 'bad girl.' shes exciting (whether that be in bed or not), shes unappologetic and sure of her actions (however insane or different they may be). It's not that she WANTS to hurt people by eventually breaking their heart, but its just a consequence of what she does. A REAL bad girl cant be made. She truly as to have a wild and thriving spirit. You cant act "bad," because its not an 'act.' anyone can get drunk and sleep with every guy at a party. No, being 'bad' is a lifestyle. The number of sexual partners can actually just be a symptom of the lifestyle; not a deciding factor. but im young. what the hell do i know.
This is cool -- but I think you guys are describing the kind of "bad" that is attractive. (I guess by these definitions I AM a "bad" girl! ) By "bad" I meant, the kind of girl that men do not like. The kind that get shunned, the kind that some people feel are going straight to Hell, etc.
Between the "l" in girl and the "s" in slut. But seriously, there is no line. It's all about perception. One person might think a girl is a slut just because they've slept with 3 people, whereas another person might consider that same girl to be very good because they haven't slept with as many as they have. In my humble opinion bad girls are bad because they are HOT. Not just physically, but their attitude, the way they move, they induce that combination feeling of sexy and guilty at the same time. That, to me, is the difference between good and bad. And I have to say, I love the bad. If a virgin can act with that kind of prowess, sure, she can be bad. But ... can any virgin have that kind of confidence? I doubt it. And yes, good girls can have gotten around. Ahhhhhh ... see, the word you want is "evil." Not "bad." And there is no such thing as an evil girl! (Unless you're a Christian, in which case, all females who have done the unthinkable, or even masturbated, they are all bad and are going straight to Hell.)
Heh heh heh ... no comment. But in defense -- I do know there are plenty of open-minded Christians ... and a lot of closed-minded other people. And I'm admittedly trying to provoke a discussion.
I'd disagree. The bad girl, who no man in his right mind should want to date (except he will often only see and get drawn in by the wild, sexy "bad" girl at first) is the girl who screws him to get what she wants -- be it jewelry, fancy dinners, etc. -- or the girl who uses men, hurting them deliberately just to boost her ego. But then, not being Christian, my values focus on not hurting others, treat others the way you want to be treated. So, having wild crazy sex, having the sexy, attractive "bad girl" attitude mentioned above, having had many partners, etc. does not make one a bad person. Using people -- well, if you're both aware that you're using one another for sexual pleasure, with no further anything, ok, but if one partner is unaware of being used, that's a problem... As I was saying, using people, deliberately toying with their emotions then dumping them for fun, or otherwise hurting people makes one a bad person (not just bad girl, cuz guys do that shit too). Along the lines of not hurting others, if you're having sex with multple partners, yet don't get tested regularly (especially if you are not using protection, but condoms don't protect against ALL stds) makes you a slut. Continuing to have unprotected sex after finding out that you are positive for any infection/disease (before being 100% cured) makes you evil.
Question: there are two women, they are both the same age, lets say 30. The first woman has slept with only 5 men. The second has slept with 15 different men. Who is the slut? The first woman, who is married, in addition to sleeping with her husband has fucked four other men. She slept with the first guy before she was married. She fucked the other three after she was married. She had a one night stand with one of them, and she fucked the other two guys at the same time without protection. They had both anal and vaginal sex and her husband never found out. The second woman has never cheated on anyone and always practices safe sex in addition to being on the pill. She started having sex at the age of 16, and so, by the age of 30 she has averaged just over 1 lover per year. She is not married. Now who is the slut?
I don't consider myself a "bad" girl, but others might see me as such ("bad" in a "good" way though) I've had sex with 2 guys in one night, one of them I didn't even know his name. (Yes, I was a bit reckless) never spoke to him before, never spoke to him after, just danced a bit and took his hand when he lead me out of the club. I think there are 4 I can't remember at all. Then the 3 I've been in LTRs with (each over 5 years) the couple I've messed around with while swinging with my husband and a few chicks in the mix. I don't walk around with my freak-ness hangin' out all over. By day, I am an attached mother of 5, a housewife, a domestic diva. I drive a minivan. I live in the 'burbs. It's always the little bit that's right underneath the surface. My minivan is pimped (not ghetto pimped, just niiiiice), I wear g-strings or nothing at all underneath my t-shirts and jeans. I wear heels instead of sneakers. Subtle sexy. If that makes me "bad" so be it. I don't think I'm "bad" in any way. I'm "well rounded". People who flaunt it have attention whore syndromes.
I like that hood of a car thing-But it has to be in a really bad neighbor hood too! LOL Or on a Pool Table in a Biker Bar!
I never thought I'd say this, but: Awesome, Jester, right on. In this case, I am officially a bad girl ... and I like it. Now I just have to work a little more on the sexual side of my deviance.
