Ok so when I went out to CO for the Rainbow Gathering this summer I went with my x b/f. Well I was lonely and well I had sex with him out there. I thought it was solely sex and nothing else. Well now I have a boyfriend. I really like this guy a lot. Well my x b/f proclaimed his love for me and i can not accept him back because for one I have a boyfriend that is really cool. The main reason why I could never accept him back even if I was single is because he cheated on me with several girls. I could never trust him. I want to be his friend, but notrhing else. I told him this, but every time i tell him this he breaks down in tears. He is friends with my friends so if I bring my new man around and the x b/f is there then I feel really uncomfortable. I feel bad that he is suffering, but why do I feel this way? He cheated on me!!! Every time I think about that I get mad. I just feel bad about the situation I put my new b/f in and seeing the x b/f go crazy. What should I do? I hate drama!
ARRGH! I feel your pain! I've been there too. But support is all I can offer right now, because I haven't found a solution either
well, ive never been in a situation like this. so from a TRUE outsiders standpoint; all i can do is tell you what I think... i think that you should look at the facts for a moment. he CHEATED on you, and its apparent thats not alright with you. You moved on, and now your X cant handle it. Though he may still have real feeligns for you; I do beleive that he may be playing the game of "chase," and he just wants what he cant have. The fact that you guys had a 'meaningless' (or so you thought) contact, and he didnt want you for anything more at the time while you were single, but instead when your interested in someone else, says that he doesnt truley want YOU. he probably sees how happy you make the new guy, and realizes what he's lost. do what youd like, but its always good to look at the situation without your inner feelings involved, and those are the facts. good luck with everything hun, i wish you the best!! ( haha, us crazy geminis )
There are advantages to not running in a pack especially if One insists on 'carrying' the emotional baggage of Others.* * Clarification: Agreement w/wizarddrew77's post... *c*
you may feel uncomfortable becuase you cheated on your current boyfriend with your ex-boyfriend who cheated on you(now im cross-eyed lol) i hope everything works out for you all~
no, I was not with my current boyfriend when i fucked my x b/f in CO. I'm VERY against cheating because it broke me in so many pieces when my x did it to me. wizarddrew77, I know I'm not responsible for anyone's feelings. I've been telling myself this constantly. It's slowly sinking in! I want to thank everyone who gave me advice! I hate being in these types of situations. Have a blessed day!
Thanks from here too. I have a "love helix" myself ... Boy loves me and I love him, but he says the love is hurting me so he leaves me for another girl he doesn't love but who worships him. Other boy comes along as my diversion from the first boy, and is using me to divert himself from other girl, but ends up jealous and resentful of my love for the first boy and sets about being an evil bastard. Third boy enters the scene as a casual interest, but because of my feelings for the first boy I fuck up an encounter and possibly scare him away. Yikes. I think we all need to form a club or something.
I think the reason you feel uncomfortable is simply because of the possible drama your ex will crate if he's around you and your new bf. If I was you I'd tell the ex you dno't want any more contact with him and that he needs to move on. Then don't respond if he tries to contact you for a while. That may sound harsh but like the wiz said you're not responsible for anyone's feelings but your own.
your ex might say he loves you, but he's just playing you. Those tears? They were just a cruel manipulation of your emotions. He isn't sincere, just lonely and horny. You've already layed down the law, and he refuses to listen. I'd cut off all contact with such a weaselly guy, personally, were I you.
