Let's Smash The Literary World Into Bits With A Wrecking Ball!

THE WOLF LARSEN MANIFESTO



1. All great Writers should gather at the entrances of the major publishing houses and urinate on their doorsteps!



2. All great Poets should use the pages of the country’s most prestigious literary magazines as toilet paper!



3. All “poets” that rhyme should be castrated at once!



4. Poetry and prose should be immoral and blasphemous! If your poetry shocks and offends religious extremists, puritanical feminists, politicians, black nationalists, white supremacists, and everybody else than you’re probably doing something right! The paintings of Picasso, the symphonies of Mahler, and the sculptures of Rodin shocked and offended many people too! The last thing the world needs is more boring polite “literature”!



5. If you write prose just like ten thousand other writers than why bother writing? Garbage men contribute far more to society than “writers” and “poets” that write like everybody else! No two authors or poets should read even remotely alike!



6. From this day forward the words Poet, Writer, Sculptor, Playwright, Painter, Composer, and all other Artists should appear in capitals. After all, some guy named god who doesn’t even exist appears in capitals and since Artists are greater than god than words like Poet and Artist should be capitalized.



7. There is no god as written in the bible. Rather, every Human Being that lives on earth is a god because Humans are the most creative animals on the planet. Therefore, Artists are gods!



8. Who cares about the rules of grammar? Take a baseball bat and SMASH the rules of grammar into pieces! Language must obey the wishes of the Writer. The Writer should take language and mold it and reshape it as he sees fit just like a Sculptor.



9. Poets and Writers need to look at the rest of the art world and learn. Poetry and fiction currently appear to be the most backward mediums of the art world. Painting has raced forward like a fast car, jazz music has run forward like a rabbit, even classical music in the last hundred years has left the writing world behind in both innovation and boldness. Writing and poetry are progressing forward at a crawl – just like a snail. All Poets and Writers should think of themselves as wrecking ball operators – we must SMASH the literary world as we know it into bits with a bold and revolutionary writing!



10. The system we live under has nothing to offer but endless wars, prisons, poverty, homophobia, racial and gender discrimination, class oppression, anti-sex puritanism, and human extinction from nuclear war. The literary establishment has nothing to offer us but airport novels, censorship (in the form of political correctness), pretentious “literary” magazines filled with hack “poetry” that sometimes even rhymes, and the never ending boring banal “well-polished” “well-crafted” “literary” fiction whose main purpose seems to be to help insomniacs fall asleep. Bartok’s symphonies don’t help people fall asleep! Igor Stravinsky’s The Rite of Spring caused a riot when it was first played! Jackson Pollock’s paintings can hardly be considered sleepy! Poetry and literature must become explosive, chaotic, alive, exciting, dynamic, etc. – just like the times we live in!



11. More than anything else remember there is no one else like you on the entire planet! So why should you write like everybody else? Write like nobody else writes! If you’re not creative than why should future generations bother reading your writing? Every Writer should be his own literary movement! Every Writer should be his own literary revolution!



Copyright 2004 by Wolf Larsen

 

get over yourself

 

Yes.


Thats all well and good.

I think I will starts now.

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BANG



God I must be WRITER.

I break all the rules. Who needs sentences...or words...or even letters.

 

Yeah, what the hell ever.

You say yourself writing is all about freedom of expression, so surely there is no logical to making such a manifesto. After all people will either be doing all that stuff already because it's their inherent style/nature, or (metaphorically or otherwise) say fuck you. Even if there was sense to it then what makes you so damn great as to know all the rules and dictate them?

I mean come on; how can someone seriously opposed grammar in article which indeed follows those conventions?

 

some of the points make sense in their own way, but you have missed the big picture. for example, poetry that ryhmes can be incrediably captivating, especially when you get your point across without sacraficing any words you wanted to use. and as randomrules so cleary showed, we NEED rules and guidelines. but the good news is, those don't have to contain your creativity.

 

Of course you have the freedom to write in your own style, and select your own subject matter- Just do it the way I tell you to!

What a joke.

 

!LOL suchanoriginalliteraryworkofartithinkilltryitmyselfimgonnawritethebestfuckingpoemyouguyshaveeverseenheregoes

.

 

Write what you want. Have people read it. If they understand it, you're a writer. If they like it, you're a good writer. If they both like and understand it, you're a great writer.


(Which is easier to write: fiction, non-fiction or manifestos?)

 

Hello.

I have written fiction, non-fiction, and a manifesto. I like to think of writing each different work as a unique experience.

Some of the above people are complaining that I am telling them how to write. On the contrary - I am defending their way to write any way they please.

Unfortunately, the debate here is a lot less intelligent than the debate on the grammar essay. Some of the replies posted here display that the traditionalists are bankrupt.

We need a revolution in the world of literature.

Cheers,

Wolf Larsen

 

Uggggggh...

After hearing what you have to say, I don't really care if you tell me how to write or how not to write or how things are or how they should be or if God exists or if god doesn't or whatever...

In fact, it mostly reminds me that most writers are self-absorbed, narcissistic twats. Honestly, you're not going to start a revolution with this crap. In fact, if you really want to start a revolution, the first thing you should try is not being annoying!

As far as I'm concerned, writing is just a job. It's not something you are born with, or some kind of spiritual gift from a higher power, and it has nothing to do with having any kind of vision.

It's the same as any job-- you get out of it exactly what you put into it. If you don't know what you're doing, then you're not going to do well. And there are also the same people you find in any workplace. There are people who know what they're doing, and there are people who don't but survive on style or charisma, and there are people who really suck but they're confident so people assume they know what they're doing even though they don't.

There are so many writers out there who think they're just fantastic people and everything they say is smart and important because they wrote a fucking book. As far as I can tell, the best way to write is to know what you're doing and try to do it well.

You can't just write some horrible obscure piece of shit book and expect everyone to love it if you don't have a reputation. The first thing you have to do is prove yourself... and that means not going wild and crazy at first but starting off simple and then working your way towards that. It's better to be boring than obscure... and better to follow the rules than pretend you know what you're doing. You have to work hard to get to the point where your experiments are worthwhile...

And hey... no copyright on this one guys! Feel free to steal my brilliant ideas and tell people they are yours!

 

I like WolfLarson's post. I think it's a bit intense. But overall I really like it. I am in a total slump right now, and to me it was inspiring. I saw that you were defending the writer's right to write what they mean, irregardless of rules and standards.

After taking a few linguistics classes, my writing style completely changed. Or more so, my writing personality. I started writing exactly how I wanted and stopped trying to be grammatically etc. correct.

I came here for writing inspiration and that's what I got.

 

Originally posted by misterrain: You can't just write some horrible obscure piece of shit book and expect everyone to love it if you don't have a reputation. The first thing you have to do is prove yourself... and that means not going wild and crazy at first but starting off simple and then working your way towards that. It's better to be boring than obscure... and better to follow the rules than pretend you know what you're doing. You have to work hard to get to the point where your experiments are worthwhile...

And yes I totally see that as well, when I submit something to a serious magazine or publisher I don't send them crazy shit they won't accept, I send them what is hot right now, what they are looking for. But I think creativity dwindles if you write everything to be published and it all fits into a nice little package that will please the people that make the rules, standards and trends of what's acceptable.

p.s. I'm glad you're back. Pm me once in a while, if you have time.

 

Hello everybody

The comment of misterrain is some very angry person making personal attacks with endless four letter words. This is all the traditionalists have to offer to explain why authors should follow tradition.

I believe writers should write whatever they want, and that no two authors should read alike. I believe that each book should be a unique and exciting experience for the reader. If the traditionalists want to call me names for saying that and spew out four letter words it just seems like the ideas of the traditionalists are ignorant and bankrupt.

When I walk into the bookstore I see that so many contemporary works of "literature" are so similar. Apparently, the only arguments that the traditionalists have to defend this unfortunate lack of creativity on the bookshelves is four letter words.

I do not feel that readers are served well by a publishing system that spews out so many nearly identical books. The works of fiction on the bookshelves are so similar that the publishers do not even know when the writers are plagiarizing or "internalizing" each other. Perhaps as a result of this lack of creativity on the bookshelves fewer and fewer people are reading every year. If you eat the same thing every day three meals a day all year long you will quickly become bored of your food - literature is no different.

Oh yes - another thing - I do not understand why some literary magazines are considered prestigious and others are not. Often - but not always - when I open a "prestigious" "widely-respected" literary magazine I find horrible "poetry" that rhymes.

However, many excellent literary magazines that publish exciting innovative work are not given the kind of publicity and support that they deserve.
How unfortunate.

Cheers,
Wolf Larsen

 

Hello everyone



One of the traditionalist posters (misterrain) made some noise about hard work - and since when do the traditionalists have a monopoly on hard work?



It is harder to be creative than to follow in the footsteps of others and do what has already been done.



I began by writing in a traditional manner in the early 1990s and I quickly felt boxed in - I felt I wasn't expressing everything that was inside of myself.



Whether composers, sculptors, painters, or poets - all great artists felt boxed in by tradition and they broke out of it. The fact that their work became more respectable with time doesn't change the fact that many of the greatest artists of history were greeted with endless insults by traditionalists when they first showed their work.



Art movements like "cubism" are known as such because that is the insulting terms that the critics and traditionalists gave the work of such pioneering greats as Pablo.



Over the centuries the contemporary work that the traditionalists defined as "good taste" wound up in the garbage, and the "annoying" work of pioneering greats is what survived.



The traditionalists tell us to follow some "path". I say artists should choose their own path!



Cheers,



Wolf Larsen

 

Okay, first of all, what you have to say is not new or exciting. It's not like you're the first person to advocate raw self-expression and denounce the tyranny and oppression of the establishment, whether it's the literary establishment or whatever. In fact, that's a pretty common theme nowadays...

But unfortunately, your manifesto is full of cliches, most of which you can hear in less obnoxious or aggressive form in your standard everyday high school creative writing course. The fact that you take it so seriously only makes it pretentious.

I'm not saying that all modern novels are brilliant, or that the Oprah Winfrey book club is where it's at either... but I think that people would rather read recycled anecdotes about family dynamics, or single women looking for love, or countless stories of ancient mysteries unlocked by one-dimensional scholars than the obscure ramblings of some nobody.

The bottom line is that books are time-consuming and demanding, and people do not give their attentions easily. If you want to be read, then you have to know what people are willing to read... you can't just blindly start writing and think that just because it's unique, people are going to pay $11.95 to read it.

 

And hey... what's with calling me a 'traditionalist'? I definitely don't think of myself that way. I'm not sitting here writing lightly comedic pot-boilers about gifted cryptologists uncovering a secret society of insipid women frustrated by eternally stupid and insensitive men or anything... though it could be funny, so it might be a good idea...

In fact, I think the main issue I'm taking with your post is that you're just telling people to break the rules as if that's enough to make something great or as if that will somehow set you free and make you a genius. Frankly, it seems really irresponsible, especially saying it in a place where people are likely to get the wrong idea.

I'm not saying its impossible to follow your vision to greatness or anything, I'm just saying that a novel has to communicate... the best novels don't fall back on obscurity and go for the truths of the human soul.

However those truths are expressed, as long as they are expressed, it doesn't matter... and no one should be afraid of following the rules if it gets them where they want to go. Unlike you, I'm not frustrated by what's out there now-- whatever is popular is always a reflection of what's going on in the public psyche, which means it can show you how you might tap into it yourself.

 

Like hell you are. I respect my publishers (why not? They respect and pay me and get my work in the hands of thousands of readers) and write entertaining genre fiction and a little poetry that sometimes includes rhyme. What part of your rant defends my approach?

 

Too many books in the bookstore are so much alike. If you pick up a book of prestigious literary fiction by a respected author and you compare it to one of Louis L’amour’s books there often doesn't seem to be much difference in the style of writing - it's like the publishing conglomerates are selling us the same kind of writing under different packaging.

Is the literary world a sham? Many people in the literary world only seem to care about money and prestige. Exciting innovative literature is the last thing on the minds of many poweful people in the literary world.

I was sitting in a coffee shop recently when I heard one writer say to another writer, “The major publishing conglomerates are nothing but whorehouses, and the literary agents are pimps – they’re literary pimps – and many authors are nothing but whores!”

“What a hypocrite you are!” exclaimed the other writer, “You have a literary pimp - and one of your books was published by one of the six whorehouses!”

“I know! I’m a whore!” responded the first writer.

I laughed (quietly).

Cheers!

Wolf Larsen

 

Hello everybody.



In the old days if you wrote a wildly creative novel it would rarely if ever find its way into the bookstore. This is still true today.



Academia, with its emphasis on the classics and excellence in tradition, is usually hostile to innovation in the literary world.



The publishing conglomerates, with their single-minded pursuit of profit are only concerned about money. And they certainly aren't going to risk money by publishing innovative literature.



My guess is that the greatest and most innovative literary works of mankind ended up in the garbage. My guess is that the celebrated classics of "excellent literature" that are part of the canon are NOT the greatest works ever written. Why did the greatest works of literature probably end up in the garbage? For the same reason that Vincent Van Gogh's paintings would have ended up in the garbage if he didn't have an appreciative brother named Theo who later pushed Vincent's Van Gogh's work after he died.



Today writers do not have to be slaves to academia and the publishing conglomerates. With print-on-demand, the Internet, and Amazon.com Writers do not need the publishing conglomerates or academia or a review in the New York Times or any of that.



In addition, with word processing Writers are also freer to be creative and experiment than ever before.



The time is ripe for a revolution in literature. In this revolution there is no need for isms as in cubism or impressionism. In this literary revolution every Writer will be his own ism - every Writer will be his own literary movement - every Writer will be his own literary revolution.



Cheers!



Wolf Larsen

 

Isnt it strange how the thread starter seems so frustrated about not being a clever writer and yet so many ambitions. People like this are called -projectionists
they project their own failuires and fallbacks onto other people.
The poster believes or assumes that writers want fame and success as a writer and ignores the fact that most people simply want the feeling of expressing themselves. They leave the poserish stylisation and cheap travel guides to those who write books so that students can buy them to analyse to death the work of DA MASTER ! The great writers say it because it sells - most people say it because its true. Truly great writers say it because they know it WILL BE true - they are artists that actually have the need to express themselves a desperate urgent need to say it how they say it - not everyone can be that
What a shallow person to believe writing is an expression of ones desire to be famous.
Almost makes me wish I gave a fuck what they think I would get into a big argument but as it is - I'm off !