Teaching (minimum) manners to neighbour children

Discussion in 'All in the Family' started by GermanLoveMachine, Aug 27, 2006.

  1. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Say youd live in a neighbourhood with a difficult social background. How would you try to teach the children of your neighbours some minimum manners ? Im not talking making them say hello when they pass me by, but Id be glad if they would stop insulting and pestering me !

    Im just asking this in this forum because I hope someone here has some experience in dealing with difficult children. Obviously I have no right to beat them up, and they know this, too ! So there must be some other way !
     
  2. mamaboogie

    mamaboogie anarchist

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    the best you can do is to lead by example. Be polite and respectful towards them. They probably have never been treated like that in their lives, and it can make a big impact.
     
  3. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    They are not your kids. You have no right to "discipline" or "teach" them anything unless the parents ask you to. Like boogie said, teaching by example is your only alternative to simply ignoring them.

    What does a "neighborhood with a different social background mean"? I am a little stumped by this. We live in a very diverse neighborhood. Two parent familes, mommy only families, a daddy only family, a lesbian family, some caucasion families, some African American Families, some Hispanic families, people living alone, some DINKS (Double Income No Kids) families ect. Just about everything. It is one of the reasons we moved here. The diversity. There are rude people, kind people, many inbetween ect. You can't control how your neighbors act, or how their children act ect. Just be kind and polite. That is really the only act you can take.
     
  4. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    In fact I said "difficult social background" a more accurate term would be "scum" :X , but I didnt want to hurt anyones feelings. And I did not move in to study their diversity, but because my parents home is just a bit too far away from Munich where I study Physics, so I cannot commute every day, and this house is very conveniently located. And I try my best to ignore the people their, in fact I usually dont mind the noise and everything, just put on my headphones and everythings fine. But I cant just ignore beeing insulted and pestered ! So its not about "controlling" anybody, Id just like them not to molest me !
     
  5. erzebet1961

    erzebet1961 Senior Member

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    Germanlove machine, they are children, when theyre bothering you, theyre just playing ! They might like you and be trying to get your attention, by teasing and chilish insults..smile and say hi to them..
     
  6. Haid

    Haid Member

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    If its bothers you just move. You can't control others children even though it would be nice at times.
     
  7. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    This might well be true and be good advice for the children YOU know, but I guarantee you, this wont work for the ones Im talking about, THESE are small-scale criminals so to say !!!
     
  8. Brand New Soul

    Brand New Soul Senior Member

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    exactly what I was going to say.

    How old are these kids?
     
  9. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    Ah, boy........I'd say, if you can't stand the heat, get outta the kitchen, or the neighborhood. You move somewhere where you feel superior to the neighbors, then complain when they act the way you EXPECT them to. Ever hear of the phenomenon where people actually start to act the way others percieve them? That is most likely what is happening in your neighborhood.

    I think this is more you than them.

    Example, lead by example. If you think these children are "scum" and criminals, do you think they don't KNOW this? Hell, my kids, who are well behaved, don't like to be around people who behave as if my children are "criminals." Some people think Hippies are "Scum" and my kids can spot these people a mile away. They do NOT abuse them, but they KNOW when they are being disrespected. Maybe show some respect for the kids, and they won't act the way you obviously expected them to.
     
  10. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Great. Lets assume for a moment that this "lead by example thing" would work. Some months ago I have been lying in the gras in the front of our house and had taken my books outside because it was too warm for studying in my room. So, according to your theory, the kids seeing this would have follwowed my example and made their homework next to me, right ? WRONG, they have insulted me in such an unrespectful way that this and some similar incidents made me show up outside ONLY WHEN I HAVE TO !!!
     
  11. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Didnt ask them, but I think the ones most pestering me are probably 10, 11 years, although there is a girl that actually THREATENT me who is definitely older. And not to forget the younger ones down to 7 years or even younger, I would not consider them to be a problem on their own, but when their older siblings start insulting me, and then they start to join them laughing at me and its 4 or 5 of them, then they ARE a problem !
     
  12. bigdickcharley

    bigdickcharley Banned

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    Children dont have same rights as adults. If they are pestering you call child protective services on the unfit parents.
     
  13. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Well, if your children ever get sick of beeing identified as hippies so easily, youd better tell them not to pose with a fucking "peace" sign right in front of a fucking TANK ! :p (Just kidding, had a look at your galery, theres nothing wrong with them !) And thanks for your advice, but as I said before, not applicable in my case....
     
  14. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Well, I guess I might call them for the complete NEIGHBOURHOOD at once, just to save them time..... But seriously, thats actually a good idea, if theres a way to do this anonimously this might actually be the way to proceed !!!! Thanx dude !
     
  15. cutelildeadbear

    cutelildeadbear Hip Forums Gym Rat

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    Sounds like the problem is you, not the children. Which one of you is supposed to be the adult here anyway? How can a bunch of kids affect you like this? Grow up.
     
  16. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    CPS will hang up on you. ( I doubt they will care if the kids are making fun of someone, this isn't part of what is considered "poor parenting" by CPS, and making things up WILL land you in jail) IF you think this is the way to go, then OWN your actions and don't do it anonymously. Sheesh.
     
  17. mamaboogie

    mamaboogie anarchist

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    How do you know it won't work? Have you ever, once, tried showing these kids the respect you expect to receive from them? Have you ever, once, tried being friendly or just spoken to these people as equals? Nah, I didn't think so. You think you are so much better than they are, they can tell it, and they are out to prove you wrong. Seems like they are doing a good job of it already, if they have gotten under your skin so badly already that you have labeled them scum and criminals. Your prejudices are the real problem, not the kids.
     
  18. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    Its NOT about making things up, on the contrary, telling them what they did to ME would almost certainly make them do something, but it would also make me a fool before all of my "neighbours" or at least the childrens parents (and you can bet your ass that they would spread the word !!!) when they ask them questions about it ! So I have to tell them about events where I was NOT involved and there its more difficult to convince them ! (Dont know about your CPS in the US but I think our burocracy here is much more lazy) And its anonymously or nothing !
     
  19. cutelildeadbear

    cutelildeadbear Hip Forums Gym Rat

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    Umm.. that is because you are a fool. You are supposed to be the adult here like we have already tried to explain to you. I suggest you seek therapy from a psychologist or something because you are never going to function in society if you are this upset about some little kids. Man I want to slap you.
     
  20. GermanLoveMachine

    GermanLoveMachine Member

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    OK thats a little of topic now but just for your info Im not only going to FUNCTION in society, I will be the very basic of society, Im studying physics right now and once I have finished it will be people like ME who keep society working at all, OK ?
     
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